MONEY MORAL DILEMMA: Should Lisa exchange her gaudy expensive engagement ring?

in-need_of_money

I think she should tell him and be honest. I waited for 20 years for my eternity ring and my husband bought me one as a surprise. It was not quite what I was expecting, and I would have liked the diamonds to have been bigger. Also, one of the diamonds was in at a funny angle, so I returned it. They didn't have another, so I got the money back and we went shopping together, I chose what I wanted. It was a lovely occasion, far more special and we had new wedding rings made as well. Much nicer. Lovely day! Both of us happy.

Mefty

A good start to any relationship is honesty. Lisa should be able to tell the truth since she will have to wear the damn thing for the rest of her life (hopefully) and the boyfriend shouldn't take the criticism personally.

Little_Miss_Moneysaver_2

Without a doubt tell him, if he loves you then he'll appreciate your honesty plus if you are going to be married better to start by being honest with each other. P.s my O.H proposed on xmas morning this year and we're picking the ring together, buying the diamond from a diamond wholesaler then having it set in the style i like - good compromise! Le

Sarahsaver

If he picked something SO out of character it would be worrying. Difficult after 4 years of a relationship tho. After 6 months or even a year I would say the big E. Thereafter really you should never accept 'second best' but time does make these things harder. Honesty is the best thing, and if the ring is the only problem then you would get over it.

wildflower

I kinda wonder what kind of mental abberation made him buy her something 'not her usual style' for starters - didn't want to marry her? bought for flash value not luv? bought what he wanted?

Man proposes. Woman accepts. Surely it's fun going together to look at symbols of commitment and finding out which ones you both like ... not only has she got to wear it forever, he's got to look at it on her aging finger? Gives you a memory of buying it together to cherish too - such memories linger me thinks.

Got a similar situation. 50th Birthday looms in under 10 days. What do I want? Something that will last and give me pleasure for years that I would never indulge myself in so to speak ... an antique (yeah well 50 years and all that), jewellery, digitial SLR? I'd want to choose it with the OH that's going to pay for it out of our funds.

Contrariness not withstanding however, beloved 40th pressie is an inexpensive imported pot that houses a quarter bottle of almost champagne that brings back the memory of that particular day.

Whatever, I'd have sent him back to the shop on his own to be sensitive to what he paid and then go together and make it a special day.

gelato_cat

Blimey - thanks for the education! Did a bit of research and it certainly opened my eyes!!!

Suze

Paul_Herring wrote:

Wow - DeBeers are certainly reaping from their advertising! Everyone on here does realise, I hope, in true MSE style, that diamonds aren't that expensive and it's only DeBeer's advertising that has enabled jewelers to sell diamonds for such extortionate prices?

From http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/De_Beers


My answer? Take it back, get the 2 months wages back. Don't bother getting a replacement - the wedding band should be sufficient.

Alibrad

I have been and still am in this situation. Although my hubby and I chose the ring together it was a choice between two.

I loved a beautiful emerald and diamond ring and he loved a solitare diamond (both were exactly the same price).

I eventually gave in, and wish that I had'nt. Although I now appreciate my ring I have still never forgotten the one I left behind!!

Mind you in true money saver style the ring was second hand and is now worth 3 times what we originally paid for it!

BNU_2

Ah, but Alibrad - you'll never sell it so the increase in value will only ever be a "potential" increase to you fiscally.

Wearing green to a wedding is often seen as bad luck - so maybe you made the right choice after all!

And besides...... isn't it about time he bought you an eternity ring??? .....I was thinking of something nice in Emerald & Diamond...

Welcome to the site by the way!!!