Being asked for money as a gift

hock79

What you've just said Magpie sounds fine, I don't get the need to dress it up with a poem, I find them quite cringy :undecided

GarryJ68

I think those schemes where they go to pay for a honey or something are okay, but in general i do agree.

I was asked not to buy presents for a relatives son and told that he has enough toys and games and that they just wanted money for him.

Outrageous!

Kara_P

I don't mind giving money as long as they put it to something nice that they want. I generally like to give them money/gift that is at least equal to the cost of them inviting me e.g. I know by chance that my cousins wedding on Saturday costs £50 a head for a full day guest and hence that what I will be giving (for them to spend on their honeymoon). If I am only invited to the night I will probably spend closer to £25.

It does bother me slightly that [STRIKE]some[/STRIKE] most people include gift lists but then I suppose at least I know what they would like rather than getting the double of something they already have... oh it is an akward one!

You can't keep everyone happy so just keep yourself happy.

split_second

last wedding i went to was an old schoolfriend that i now work with, i was happy to give b and q vouchers as they were doing their house up, i prefer when it comes to presents for people to tell me what they want and i get it for them, item or voucher as long as you want it thats what i care about, if its something you dont like it wastes my money and your time

PootleFlump_3

Completely agree with you OP. I dont like the whole asking for cash thing either. Wedding list doesnt bother me at all but if I was invited to a wedding where they asked for cash I wouldnt give them it. I would still buy them a gift but definately not give money.

RainbowDrops

I prefer giving a gift than money, and am always thankful when a gift list is included in an invite as it takes the pressure off feeling unsure about what to get.
But if the B&G asked for no gifts, Id probs give them a voucher rather than cash, as I would feel it was more likely to be spent on an "item" rather than dissapear into an account.


As an aside, we found that the cash gifts we were given were often cheques addressed to MR & MRs Drops, so we had to open a joint bank account before we could pay in the cheques!

Hollie84

Magpie27 wrote: »

We have being having this debate in our house last night as we are getting married next year. Nicola00007 your poem sounds like the kind of thing I suggest which says we really don't need anything however if anyone really wanted to give us something we would prefer money towards something we couldn't normally afford. However I would just as happy that they give nothing and just come and enjoy our day. Would you be happy to share your poem?

Google wishing well poems there is loads

Hollie84

MandyMoo22 wrote: »

i like it when people give money to my son because i save it for when he is bigger, my brother never buys my son anything because he has a bank account c/o my son and he pays into that monthly, and more on occasions, and to that im greatful because at current my son has more money than me, think when his 18!

but people do love buying presents and seeings faces of children with toys, or adults with presents they chose, they like seeing people happy with what they go - so altho im doing the poem for honeymoon cash im quite open to it all.

Same here,any money my daughters get goes into there savings account till there older and any money we put into there piggy banks each week we add up every few months and take it the bank,needless to say they have a very good start so far and there not even 5 yet:)

DaisyFlower

Completely agree OP, i dont attend if the person requests cash unless a close family member and then I take a present and dont give cash.

Asking for cash is akin to charging an entry fee. If people want the money for x or to go on honeymoon then they can either save like most do or spend less on the wedding and not expect the guests to fund it.

Sammy85_2

RainbowDrops wrote: »

As an aside, we found that the cash gifts we were given were often cheques addressed to MR & MRs Drops, so we had to open a joint bank account before we could pay in the cheques!

Yes, and we couldnt pay the cheques into our joint account until i changed my name on the account... It was nice to see my new name written on the cheques though!

We had a very nice bank manager who allowed us to pay them in early because it takes 24hrs for the system to acknowledge the name change. I didnt want to have to bring the cheques back into town again the next day.