Christmas Escape from Mother in Law & Stepson

Gigglepig

the_cat wrote: »

It might be cheaper to just tell the truth!

Chances are they will only try to arrange a 'mock christmas' get together for a date near to when you are away. Then you have the ludicrous expense of holidaying at the most expensive time of year and STILL have to either meet up or confront the issue

That is a good point :-)

The OP mentioned that the MIL is a strict vegan. Is this the source of problems OP?

Another thought - some times it is easier to get along with in-laws if you invite them to your house (your house, your rules hehe)

Perhaps there are some travel bargains for Florida, have you tried the travel board on MSE?

arbroath_lass

TBH I think the OP really is coming across as the wicked stepmother here. Hopefully that is not the case and she does have valid reasons for not wanting a Dad to spend time with his son. Either way running away will not help. What will you do next year?. Can you not discuss it with your family (and they are your family now, too)?

Gigglepig

puddy wrote: »

whats his age got to do with anything?

Because he is a young adult who might not yet have established his own family, perhaps he is at uni or somewhere and dependent on staying in family accommodation during the Christmas holiday, he also has a stepmum who doesn't seem to like him very much?

I know 21 year olds who would be really hurt and upset and feel quite alone in the world if they were not invited to spend Christmas with their family, perhaps the ones you know are a lot more independent/well established and don't give a toss.

As I said, if he can spend Christmas with his mum's side of the family then all is well :-)

balletshoes

I'd second the idea of a rural cottage somewhere in the countryside in the UK . Remember the terrible weather we had last December, I was driving up to Scotland in -11 temps on Christmas Eve morning. I'd rather be able to get there by road, than spend thousands on a trip abroad and possibly not make it due to bad weather closing the airports.

scheming_gypsy

Gigglepig wrote: »

Yes, really. If he can stay with his mum/that part of the family then all is well. But if not, then imagine being 21 years old and alone for Christmas?


Then gain, perhaps he is delighted at not having to spend Christmas with stepmum ;-)

Not just stepmum!
Imagine being 21 and spending Christmas with the family including your vegan grandma. He'd probably prefer to do his own thing but does the 'family thing' to keep them happy.

kavics17

Come on, 21 is old enough to make his own plans for Xmas! If he knows they won't be here than he can already arrange something for himself.

I haven't been spending Xmas with my family since I was 21 because I can't take any days off over Xmas and they live abroad. I actually quite enjoy being just with my partner and no one else, it's quiet and relaxing (and yes, we do visit them in January or early December when we can take holiday). I am not scarred for life because of this!

Maybe you should try Tenerife or Lanzarote? We went there on 2nd January and had 24-31 degrees all week. It's much cheaper.

Gigglepig

kavics17 wrote: »

Come on, 21 is old enough to make his own plans for Xmas! If he knows they won't be here than he can already arrange something for himself.

I haven't been spending Xmas with my family since I was 21 because I can't take any days off over Xmas and they live abroad. I actually quite enjoy being just with my partner and no one else, it's quiet and relaxing (and yes, we do visit them in January or early December when we can take holiday). I am not scarred for life because of this!

Maybe you should try Tenerife or Lanzarote? We went there on 2nd January and had 24-31 degrees all week. It's much cheaper.

I think it is a big difference to not spend Christmas with family due to having your own work/travel/life/practical reasons compared to if they did not want to spend it with you?

Some people have partners/friends/other people but many people are lonely at Christmas.

Like you I am also an independent person but not everyone is, and Christmas is family time for many people. I don't know the OP's stepson or MIL but there is a possibility that they may be quite upset if they don't have other people to spend Christmas with.

littlerat

Hmmm, for years my family was obviously selfish as my grandparents had to spend it alone, we should've gone to them.


Of course... then the other set would've been alone, so we'd have still been selfish. Huh.


As to the 21 year old - he could be married with kids for all we know, although it seems unlikely. If so that's very different from if he and his dad will want to spend it together and the OP is truly being an evil stepmother!
But yes, most 21 year olds I know still choose to spend it with their parents.

lurvlyloz

everyone thought i was selfish last year because i chose to spend it at home alone. it was the nicest stress free Christmas's i'd ever had. and i had pie & chips for Christmas dinner

you need to do what makes you & your husband happy. sod everyone else x

LEJC

we havent spent a christmas at home for many years now....and have tried many different holidays over that period on various budgets...you dont give your budget but the types of things we have done include

An early booking to the caribbean to secure the best discount...although this was expensive when we factored in how much we would save by not buying christmas presents and all the trimmings it worked out quite reasonable

We have done the christmas in Florida...did that this one just gone...we booked it as a package flying with virgin and staying at a cheap hotel on international drive with car included...again was very reasonable in cost as we didnt have presents to consider...our price per person came in at what yoou have been looking at for flights only...one word of warning though...its pleasent weather there at that time of year but certainly not hot...more like a spring day than summer...but as its not high season there its less crowded...

We have also just taken a 2 day break in the UK whereby we've booked into a travelodge or holiday inn express for christmas day and the 26th then booked a christmas meal at a local resturant or pub...these do need to be booked in advance but dependant on where you go you can get some very good 3 and 4 course christmas lunches for £50 per person ...travelodges again are very cheap especially if you choose less popular ones...between £9-15 per night is easily achievable if booked now...one year we stayed at the one in Glastonbury in somerset for £9 per night and had a lovely christmas at the bear in Street a marstons pub..plenty of other options on their website for christmas day around the country and usually updated in about september for the current year..the whole thing costing just a little over £100...


Hope that gives you some ideas to think about so that you have the christmas you want....