Christmas Escape from Mother in Law & Stepson

Jerryjerryjerry

eamon wrote: »

I'm with jerryjerryjerry on this one. Stick to your guns, google is your friend for xmas's away. Don't forget to send the christmas card. To do otherwise would be seen as churlish and lacking in manners.

thank you so much! Loving your excellent sense of humour. x

mountainofdebt

Jerryjerryjerry wrote: »

Bingo. Hit the jackpot. I would LOVE for nothing more than her not being interested in me. She's almost like a stalker.

Perhaps she knows exactly what you think of her and actually enjoys making your life hell.

Jerryjerryjerry wrote: »

Do you have a daughter in law that hates your guts as well? It can only explain why you sound like you do.

Just accept that you can't force yourself on her and get on with your life.;)

Nah Junior has far too many ambitions in life, as well as being too young, to settle down yet.

BUT I am making it my personal goal for my DIL to love me - by teaching Junior that housework is not just for women and I've had two good teachers on how MIL should behave towards their SIL / DIL.

You've obviously missed my point though....the point I was making was that if my DIL turned out to be a person like you, there's no way on this planet would she get to enjoy any of my money - whether it be while I was alive or after my death

You obviously chose to ignore my comments re being a carbon copy - too close to the truth perhaps?

Violetta_2

And breathe.
Work out your budget & figure out somewhere you & oh would really like to go for Xmas & have an amazing time.
After last Xmas spent waiting on my own MIL whilst suffering the worst flu ever. Slaving out in the kitchen whilst she sat on her bum doing F.all (oh lord I could go on) It will be a long time before I spend another Xmas with her. I finally told her a few home truths on Boxing day & haven't spoken to her since, it's been bliss.
I think I'd go to Tromso to see the Northern Light's

anguk

Do you have children of your own? I ask because you sound a bit like my Dad's wife. She didn't like the idea that my Dad had any family, she thought it should always just be the two of them, she made no effort whatsoever to get to know my Grandmother or me and my 3 siblings. You'll be pleased to know that in the end we all ended up not bothering with them, none of my siblings have any contact with her or my Dad and my Grandmother is in a old peoples home so she got her wish and it's now just the two of them.

Maybe in time the same will happen for you, your MIL will get older & go into a home or die and your husband's children will grow tired of being hated and resented by their step-mother and just cut contact. Then you'll have your wish and it'll just be you and your husband. Of course there's always the chance that your husband will then resent you.

rosevelvet

It's fine to have spend Christmas "alone" with just your chosen family, but the way the OP talks about her mother in law and stepson is revolting.

dirtysexymonkey

funny how the op is happy to criticise her stepson for having no values, but doesnt seem to grasp that it was her husbands job to instil values into his children. i dont think anything could be her wonderful husbands fault. and then she has the cheek to attack her mother in law for making a few comments to her face, but she thinks its acceptable to slag her off to hundreds of thousands of people on the internet! you couldnt make it up. well someone probably has.

op i wouldnt book a holiday too remote, you never know, your husband might read this thread and not take too kindly to such discusting words from his wife about his child and mother.

i cant quite express how horrible you sound. truly vile. i think you probably dont like your mil because she tells you a few home truths, and you cant stand being confronted with the reality of your bitter personality. and its always the ones who shout the loudest who are the most worthless. and you my head shout extremely loudly.

seven-day-weekend

I personally find it very sad that you can't put up with them for a day for your husband's sake.

As for the yong man, well it is your husband's responsibility, as well as the boy's mother, to instill good values into him.

What a dysfunctional family all round, what a shame.

ailuro2

Ignoring your reasons for going away...

we've been away to 3 different places for Christmas/New Year, Florida, Tenerife and Malaga... of the three Florida was the most expensive, nost fraught with travel problems, and also the coldest.

Malaga was warm and sunny and codst less than £1000 for 2 adults and a child, including self catering house rented online, flights, car for 2 weeks.

Tenerife was nearer the £3K mark for three of us, but it was warm, sunny relaxing and 4.5 hrs on the plane. No jetlag either as the time difference is minimal.

Florida cost around £4K plus allt he park tickets etc, ended up we spent £6K in total.

Guess where we're going back to this year.... yes, Tenerife, perfect place to relax in the sun at Christmas, pretty much guaranteed the weather, loads of places to eat decent food in nice surroundings.

misgrace

The only suggestion I can make is to go away over Xmas and if your oh is okay with this then book something.

Maybe I am reading some of the OP posts differently to others, but I dont think she is a horrible person for actually saying she has had enough, and for saying whats on her mind.
She might not want them there at Xmas, but she has had them there every xmas for years, other people wouldnt have them at all.

The other issues the OP has other than the Xmas day dinner will need to be sorted out, but I for one thinks she has done her bit over the years with the Xmas day dinners.
Have this one off and enjoy it with you and your husband.

January20

akin_drum wrote: »

Neither. The OP is honest (brutally so!) and forthright, but I don't think she is a troll or an idiot and to call her so is unfair and unkind. You may not agree with her, but there is no need for the insults, is there?

I agree with this. The OP is very honest. There are a lot of posts on this board of people suffering because of their in-laws and just putting up with it/ being too meek to do anything about it. The OP obviously has strong feelings and it sounds like this board is the only place where she can vent properly, let all the anger out. She doesn't hide her feelings, so what?

I have been riled up by this thread too, but not because of the OP, because of the nasty comments she has received from the usual "oh I am so perfect" brigade. Again, we only have a snapshot of the OP's life and how many of you have read her previous thread about her stepson? Really read it and not just skimmed it to find info to beat her up with? When I read it, I felt she had been tricked by her husband. I have sympathy for the OP. Sometimes, it's like posters refuse to try and understand, refuse to have any kind of empathy!

I don't think the OP is selfish. She has given clues in this thread about all the things she does for her MIL and the stepson, like take them groceries after work. Clues which have been conveniently ignored.

It sound like the OP has hidden the depth of her feelings from her husband and that the in-laws don't have a clue. A truly selfish person would have made clear how she felt.

OP, ignore the nastiness. Life is too short to spend it with people you don't like or make you unhappy. I would suggest you re-post on the travel board - without the family issues.