Trying for a Baby Part 7

mrsj28

Sa-ra-ra-ra wrote: »

YES!

I bought a sparkly Christmas Reindeer from BHS at the weekend. It makes me very happy, and I want to put it up NOW but I'm not allowed I keep getting it out of the bag and looking at it

When I told my mum, her first reaction was 'Is it life sized?'. WHY would I buy a life-size sparkly reindeer? That would clearly be excessive. It's only a foot tall. [strike]They didn't sell life sized ones, otherwise I would have one of those instead.[/strike]

I was just walking home and saw a couple of metre high sparkly reindeers in a shop window! I even took a photo on my phone in the hope that I could upload it but can't work out how...

Just had to share that as it really made me :laugh: after all the sparkly reindeer chat on here.

Hope everybody who wants to BD (or needs to and doesn't want to..) has fun tonight! My DH is tired and grumpy so no chance here...

gizmodo_2

divorcingjack wrote: »

Oh no, perhaps I used the wrong term. He's not an "actual" headhunter - he works for this other company and I met him on a course and we got talking.

He is trying to entice me away to his company. To be honest, I don't take much enticing. :rotfl:

He could still be getting something. Agencies take an insane amount of money when you get a job through them, our company offers us perks/bonus etc if we introduce a friend to the company and they get the job.

Anyway, sounds good. I can understand your concerns over the pension and the SMP. Obviously I don't know your financial situation but it's amazing how you adjust. I've taken a year maternity leave, I saved up £5500 to do so as I just got the basic SMP. I'm in my 10th month now *sob* and still haven't touched my savings :T

time2deal

Nicki wrote: »

You tell them before you accept the job that you need to compare the full package, and ask for details of:

holiday
sickness
maternity
pension
PHI
all other benefits

and make your decision based on that. Its what a man would do, though obviously they wouldn't be interested in the maternity bit, and perfectly acceptable in a professional highly paid job, particularly if you are being headhunted.

If their package isn't as good as what you have, or if there is a qualifying period, you have a choice of either staying where you are, or negotiating a better package at the new firm. Which might mean they say no because they suspect you are planning a family soon, but in that case you are no worse off than if you just turned them down out of hand.

Good luck.

I changed job just recently (hence one month on the pill) and it's really hard to find out about Maternity benefits. It's never in standard contracts, and then they say 'oh you can see all the employee policies when you start'. Luckily I knew someone who knew someone there who checked it out for me. No better than my last job, but I did found out I couldn't be pregnant when I started.

Turned out not to be an issue - but it was good to know. But it is really hard when you don't know what is available, and it's so hard to ask.

I think that I may have been a bit optimistic yesterday about OV, still only showing a light line, which may not mean anything. I'm thinking it is a bit early so I will go through the full cycle of tests to see if I have learn more about how my cycle works.

Good luck to everyone else. I normally post in one of the more serious and argumentative forums, so it's nice to find a nice and friendly group! I think someone asked for more details about me - I am 35, so a bit older than the average here I think, especially for number one. But still hopeful. I was told I have PCOS as a teenager, so had assumed kids wouldn't be possible for a long time, but 2 years ago I finally went for another test and they said there was no evidence of PCOS anymore.

So to an extent I only really started thinking that kids would be an option a few years ago. And only just married so time to attempt this seriously!

time2deal

Nicki wrote: »

Bloody men! DH came home last night and we were talking about this trip to India. He had originally said he was going on Wednesday, which will be Cd14 for me but I often ovulate on CD12 so although not thrilled was ok about that. Last night he announced he was going to book his flight for Tuesday morning as his first meeting is actually on Wednesday morning. When I expressed concern, he said we could always do the deed when it gets back (a week later!) as it's not like we only had 24 hours after ovulation!!!!! Honestly, I really give up. We have had fertility treatment spanning about 6 years, where we did numerous monitored cycles, and also had IUI twice where timing was crucial. How in hell has he got to this stage with not even a basic knowledge of female fertile windows. When I explained to him that the egg lived for between 12 and 24 hours and the fertile window per month was usually a maximum of 3 days he was genuinely gob smacked. Men!!!!!!!!

I had to go back and find this post as when I read it earlier at work I laughed out loud! I do find it amazing how little they know. My OH really has no idea - he just thinks I am suddenly more interested in him for a week or so a month.

You would think teenage boys would make it a point to find out to have their way with teenage girls! Probably good they dont.... :eek:

Nicki

Dreamer_me wrote: »

Sorry, meant to also ask...is there ANYTHING I can do (apart from losing weight) that might help to kickstart my cycles?

Have a read of these recommendations.

http://www.marilynglenville.com/general/polycystic.htm

Marilyn Glenville is very very good with recommendations to improve fertility. Her suggestions are well worth a try.

For weight loss and PCOS, a low carb diet is fab. It can be really hard yo shift the weight due to the insulin problems PCOS causes but low carb diets counteract this. I have had it in the past (mostly resolved by having ovaries drilled) and this kind of diet really worked for me.

Hth

Dreamer_me

Thanks Nicki, I'll check it out

divorcingjack

gizmodo wrote: »

He could still be getting something. Agencies take an insane amount of money when you get a job through them, our company offers us perks/bonus etc if we introduce a friend to the company and they get the job.

Anyway, sounds good. I can understand your concerns over the pension and the SMP. Obviously I don't know your financial situation but it's amazing how you adjust. I've taken a year maternity leave, I saved up £5500 to do so as I just got the basic SMP. I'm in my 10th month now *sob* and still haven't touched my savings :T

Actually, you reminded me - we get a refer-a-friend bonus too. He's a couple of levels up from me.

We're not on the breadline, and could manage for me to take 9 or even 12 months off on SMP. I have the savings, I just hate spending them!! It's silly really, if I take this new job, I'd get a company car and then wouldn't have to buy a new car - which I was going to do in the next couple of weeks! The savings from not having to buy a new car and insure it etc would balance out the lack of maternity pay.

time2deal wrote: »

I changed job just recently (hence one month on the pill) and it's really hard to find out about Maternity benefits. It's never in standard contracts, and then they say 'oh you can see all the employee policies when you start'. Luckily I knew someone who knew someone there who checked it out for me. No better than my last job, but I did found out I couldn't be pregnant when I started.

Turned out not to be an issue - but it was good to know. But it is really hard when you don't know what is available, and it's so hard to ask.

This is what I'm worried about time2deal - we have a company handbook which has maternity details in it, but my current company is blue-chip and very large. New company is much smaller, and might not have the info all together.

I have emailed him back anyway, so we'll see what happens. Fingers crossed!

I don't think i said hi when you joined the thread, so WELCOME! Nice to have you here

dj x

time2deal

I think generally smaller companies have less generous Mat leave. Good luck with the new role though, and as you say you shouldn't get too caught up in the details - you will probably have various pros and cons with the new job. In relation to getting pregnant, I think businesses cope with it.

If you are only gone for 6 months, time flies so you are back before you know it. Plus I think it makes you a better long term employee - because once you have a young child it's much harder to get a new job, and you start to value your job more.

jen77_2

Another one here for the 'Persuade the other half to BD tonight' club...he doesnt finish work til midnight so not fancying my chances .....maybe in morning.:o
Despite my earlier post i appear i may have some ewcm this evening and i did another opk this evening 8.30ish and got an almost instant faint line...the test i did this afternoon didnt come up that quick but when i rummaged in bin for this afts old test the line has come up quite dark... maybe ive been doing them too early in day? This ov thing is a mystery to me.

emsbet

Dreamer_me wrote: »

Sorry, meant to also ask...is there ANYTHING I can do (apart from losing weight) that might help to kickstart my cycles?

Agnus Castus is supposed to help regulate your hormones. Soy, when taken in the early part of your cycle can help with ov.

xx