Why do I even bother with internet dating.

JoeyG

VestanPance wrote: »

A lad at work gave up on it after a year of trying. He said it ended up making him feel depressed, as very few messages he sent ever got a reply. That and people that did send a message that would just go awol all of a sudden. I think the poor bloke only managed to get two dates from it in a year and near £120 worth of subscriptions later! He felt it made him very cynical about everyone on there and that's why he quit.

This is exactly my experience

Best just to leave the profile up there as an unpaid member, and basically forget about it (may need to login every now and then to make sure you don't go to the bottom of the search pile)

If you're lucky and get a message or some interest you can decide at that point if it's worth paying the subscription.

sashadesade

The guy wanted to get in your pants, then gave up when he realised it was going to be more work than he anticipated. Sorry to be blunt, but there it is. Oh, and his 'friend's girlfriend'? Yeah, right.

There are a hell of a lot of men like this on online dating sites, so you should be careful. The fact you had pinned so many hopes on a guy you talked to online once or twice is worrying to me. You need to guard your heart a bit more or you're going to get hurt a lot.

zcrat41

Have some fun - don't worry about him - crack on to the other fish in the sea.

And internet dating can work. I married the chap I met online a few weeks ago. I'd highly recommend Muddymatches!

Acc72

sashadesade wrote: »

The guy wanted to get in your pants, then gave up when he realised it was going to be more work than he anticipated.

That is what I thought !

It sounds like he is just playing a numbers game, if he gets any negative vibes he just moves onto the next one until he gets lucky.

As in "real life" there will be people like this as well as the genuine one's.

If you had a bad experience with somebody you met in a supermarket, you wouldn't refuse to go in a supermarket again would you ?

I also agree with the other posts about you appearing to come accross as too clingy. This again will put people off (both the genuine and the not so genuine).

Icey77

I'm with the "Block him and try again" crowd.

I met my DH on eHarmony and had a quite a few match conversations start and finish as well as a couple of coffee dates before I got matched with him. Each time I ended a match it was because I followed my gut instinct - if I didn't like something about this guy I was more than likely not to like it/him anymore if we met.

I'd suggest trying again and not pin all your hopes on one match until that match is shinning so much more than all the rest.

:beer: Good luck

squirrelchops

I met my OH on line and my close friend also met her OH on line so there are plenty of success stories.

However, it is brutal out there! Honestly you have to navigate around the serial daters, the married ones, the wierdos etc etc but it can be such a laugh too. I have had some interesting dates and some terrible ones but you chalk it up to experience and after a while you soon find you can work out the genuine ones from those that aren't.

My OH was one guy who I talked to for absolutely ages before we finally met. We both had other dates in the mean time and I was at the point of giving up on the internet dating due to a bad experience but he persuaded me to give it one more go and I am glad I did!

SandC

He could well be an old hand at internet dating and doesn't see the point in long, drawn out online conversations when you can just meet up and see if you get on or not. It is 'dating' after all, not just meeting someone on a forum.

As for the friend's girlfriend thing, well if there was something dodgy going on why mention it at all? But then again I had a lying, cheating toad of a boyfriend who sussed that one out - he always said if you were cheating then you would never mention 'that' person, which makes things look odd so you would get suspicious. So if he did mention a certain person I would think nothing of it, if that makes any sense?

Anyway, I do understand where you are coming from as I would be very sensitive too (that's why I don't do it, among other reasons).

VestanPance

zcrat41 wrote: »

I married the chap I met online a few weeks ago.

That was quick!

bacardi66

I would go along with what most of the other posters on here say - you really do need to take things far less seriously and not read too much into things.

Ive been internet dating on and off for quite a few years as I know several people who have found their special someone that way - hasn't worked for me (yet!)

I never meet anyone in person unless I have been chatting to them online for quite a while and am fairly certain they are genuine. I have seen a couple of men on dating websites who I know in real life and I know for a fact are in relationships - you have to be very careful. If someone wants to meet up pretty instantly I would imagine they are after one thing, when Ive told guys I would rather wait a while the genuine ones have been fine and waited until I was ready whereas the others have disappeared (for obvious reasons)

And you don't really "know" someone unless you have talked to them over a period of time and actually met them. When you are just chatting online you have no idea whether they are in fact married/attached or they are lying (as some do) about their age, height or have even put a fake photo up.

Ive met some very nice blokes via dating websites but sadly with internet dating its only when you meet them in person that you realise there is no "spark" there. Its all the other way round from how it is when you're younger and meet men in pubs/clubs have a lot of "sparks" :rotfl: and then realise they are complete and utter pillocks.

Just keep an open (slightly cynical) mind and enjoy yourself. Some of my friends have had great experiences and settled down/married/had kids with their internet dates - so you never know!

Magicboo

VestanPance wrote: »

That was quick!

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:
That's what I thought when I read it!