Help! Daughter and BF booked for *cheap* trip to Dublin!

ahall41116

elvis86 wrote: »

This may work for you, but it's quite a regimented approach to a holiday and won't be for everyone (in fact I don't know of anyone being so organised!). Perhaps not for your daughter and her BF.

It works quite well by way of planning expense, i dont think we've ever done the things planned on the day they were planned, but it gives an idea of cost

elvis86 wrote: »

It sounds to me like you're in a difficult position with your daughter, in many ways you still maintain a parent/infant relationship (eg attending the bank with her, like she's not capable), and it's fair to say that she's perhaps over-reliant on your support. However, she is an adult, and as such, only wants to accept/tolerate your involvement when it suits her, and will rebel by doing things such as booking a holiday. The parents of a regular 21 year old would have no business inteferring, but you feel compelled to because in other areas of her life she behaves like a child and requires (and actively seeks) your support?

We suggested she made an appointment at the bank to try and sort out the mess she has got herself in (she has a HX Cardcash account with £100 overdraft, allowed herself to use it one month, got £30 charge the following month, didnt put money in to cover it, got £75 worth of £5per day charges, paid that off, got another £30 charge etc etc) but i have no intention of going into the meeting with her, for one reason i dont think data protection will allow me to be there, but we all need someone to guide us (it took me a long time to apply for *my* bank charges back)

elvis86 wrote: »

I really would advise you to leave them to it. It's not like they're going to a third world country or the other side of the world. Best case scenario; they have a brilliant time and prove themselves entirely capable, allowing you to feel happy letting go a bit more. Worst case scenario; they mess up as you've predicted, they run out of money and you have to shell out £500 for flights which you make them pay back!

This is what we are going to do.

Hopefully they will not need our assistance!

will report back if anything new comes to light.

Ash

photome

ahall41116 wrote: »

here's the update.

They booked to go to rome, they were always going to rome, they never had any intention of going to dublin.

the wife, me and child no2 was on holiday last week, and we returned to be told child (!) no 1 had booked to go away with BF, and knowing we wouldnt be pleased that she had committed to a trp when she knew she was needed for childcare due to me and wife travelling with work, i guess panicked, and said dublin thinking we would think it would cost less. this deception even went as far as commenting on the daybreak feature about spending a day in dublin for £50.

ash

Needed for childcare ! Is that something she had commited to or were you just expecting her to do it.

You also say about working out a grid with expenses etc and you want her to do the same

It sounds like you want her to be a mini me rather than her own person although I do understand the concern with her being overdrawn.

I really do think you should let her to stand on her own 2 feet

wriggly

poet123 wrote: »

The area around the station in Rome (Termini) is not that safe. I would stay a bit nearer the centre.

The area around Termini is central, cheap and not that bad! Keep your eyes on your bags/pockets, but that's true anywhere near a public transport hub.

How about this place in the Termini area: http://www.popinnhostel.com/

Not stayed there, but I have stayed in similar places nearby.

poet123

wriggly wrote: »

The area around Termini is central, cheap and not that bad! Keep your eyes on your bags/pockets, but that's true anywhere near a public transport hub.

How about this place in the Termini area: http://www.popinnhostel.com/

Not stayed there, but I have stayed in similar places nearby.

After dark it attracts those who you would prefer your inexperienced traveller 21 year old daughter not to have to run the gauntlet of imo. During the day it is fine, but there are safer places to stay. I stay in Rome quite frequently with my husband as he works for an Italian company.

This is a good article with some good suggestions.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/hotels/1308155/Romes-best-budget-hotels.html

nickyhutch

My son's just turned 17. This year (whilst still 16) he organised getting from Rochdale to the South of France - lift, train, bus, hotel, plane, bus in France and the same getting back - for himself and his 2 friends. He sorted out his spending money and even brought some home.

He organised their Glastonbury trip which was 2 days after getting back from France - lift, coach, bus and the same back - and all the gear they needed to take. If I tried to sort any of that out for him, I don't think I could have done a better job.

lfc84

she'll come back engaged

ferf1223

elvis86 wrote: »

This may work for you, but it's quite a regimented approach to a holiday and won't be for everyone (in fact I don't know of anyone being so organised!).

We are - we have more than 3 rows a day too (more than morning/afternoon/evening)...we don't fill them all, not anywhere near...but it does help to slot the must-do things in and go from there...never actually used it for cost purposes but for loose and flexible planning it works well for us...if it's just a general idea/guide it's not too regimented...actually sticking to it might be though.

Pollycat

ahall41116 wrote: »

whenever we've gone on holiday, ive always started with a grid, 1 column for each day away, 1 row for morning, lunch, afternoon and dinner/evening. this allows me to plan what we *think* we might do, when, and put an estimate of cost against it.

We do this too, not on our 2 or 3 week holidays but for me, I think if you're doing a city break for a just a few days, it's important to know in advance what you want to see, whereabouts in the city it is and - very important, when it's open.

No point trekking across the city to visit xxx place to find out it's closed on Mondays.

We landed in Dublin at 07:30 in the morning and by 09:30 we had dumped our bags in the hotel luggage room and were on the Hop on - Hop off bus (tickets booked online and collected at the airport) to get our bearings of the city.

Even on our 2/3 week holidays, I like to do my research so I know what the area and resort offers.

robpw2

ahall41116 wrote: »

if we have anything to do with it, ther'll be 2 single beds!! lol

flat for 6 days for €450? any ideas?

Ash

op she is 21, not 16 fgs ... i appreciate you want to help her find chepa accom but you need to wise up

Pollycat

robpw2 wrote: »

op she is 21, not 16 fgs ... i appreciate you want to help her find chepa accom but you need to wise up

I think to be fair to the OP, his comments about single beds were made tongue-in-cheek.