Nice people thread part 4 - sugar and spice and all things

zagubov

Kennyboy66 wrote: »

I don't mind but would much prefer them to study away than stay in their home city despite the extra expense.

Liverpool, Manchester, Sheffield all fabulous cities to be a student in.

One of those has made her an offer; I like all three cities, but its not what I like that matters!:)

I went to uni at 17 (normal for Scotland) but went away from home (not so normal!).

Now living in England, I've met loads of people who've studied in another sometimes very distant city. It seems absolutely routine down here. Wondered about the advantages.

One of the places she's applied to is here in London but a bit of a hike so not sure if it's commutable.

Obviously we'd like DD to become more independent which was something I valued duirng my studies. On the other hand I was lesss than 100 miles from home and could be home by train in an hour and a half.

zagubov

lemonjelly wrote: »

With hindsight, I think the local university was better for me (but I stress the "for me" bit). I say this, as related to the earlier "not a morning person" discussion, I'm not 100% I'm well enough self disciplining to get my lazy !!!!! outta bed to attend lectures on time all the time. I also think that for an 18/19yo there is a massive learning curve in the difference in learning culture, together with the learning to live independently on your own & be responsible for managing a house, budget, bills etc.

So, you need to consider the quality of the course at the uni.
You need to consider the quality of local accommodation.
You need to consider what support students at the said establishment have (v important & under-rated usually imo)
You need to allow your offspring to get a sense of independence, together with knowledge a safety net is there.

Have you spoken to DD about what they would prefer? Or is the question about what you would prefer? Because that then leads to the question of wheteher a 17/18/19yo young un knows what they want!:eek:

There's little else to choose between the courses, facilities, standards. She is torn between a very distant and a local one and not sure she's made her mind up yet- it's a close call!

Did any other NPs who went to HE go local or far away?

lostinrates

zagubov wrote: »

There's little else to choose between the courses, facilities, standards. She is torn between a very distant and a local one and not sure she's made her mind up yet- it's a close call!

Did any other NPs who went to HE go local or far away?

dh came to UK from italy, and I went 100 and so miles away. (but had been in Uk for school while my parents were on t'other side of the world so it didn't matter so much to me') it was better when older because I had a car!

edit: worth pointing out dh felt very at home in oxford hving spent a lot of time there s a kid and knowig lots of people there,

Davesnave

My DD2 is 100miles away, but it's about 4.5 hours by train, minimum, so it might as well be further. She is OK with this, but at 22, hardly a youngster. My other DD went 100miles too, so she could be home in 90 minutes or so, but didn't particularly want to!:rotfl:

For some courses, the student will know exactly where they want to go. My DD knew that she could go on one course in a familiar city and have an easy time, but she chose to go somewhere new because the course was more demanding and, ultimately, better for her development.

I chose the college with the nicest environment and views.

LydiaJ

I went to Oxford because of what it is rather than where it is. My parents were in Bristol. I found the distance was certainly enough for independence, without the travel being seriously troublesome at the beginning and end of term. But then I had spent a year working (and living away from home) between school and uni, so the independence thing was already pretty sorted.

lostinrates

LydiaJ wrote: »

I went to Oxford because of what it is rather than where it is. My parents were in Bristol. I found the distance was certainly enough for independence, without the travel being seriously troublesome at the beginning and end of term. But then I had spent a year working (and living away from home) between school and uni, so the independence thing was already pretty sorted.

fwiw I chose my course because it was meant to be the best in the country for that subject. In retrospect I would not hve chosen that college again, and would have chosen a more sociable location with less good course content. thats probably a bit contraversial, but while dh still goes to Oxford stuff now, round the world even, I only go back if an event I ant to go to happens to be happening on the property...that about three times since I guess...

chewmylegoff

zagubov wrote: »

There's little else to choose between the courses, facilities, standards. She is torn between a very distant and a local one and not sure she's made her mind up yet- it's a close call!

Did any other NPs who went to HE go local or far away?

I went to UCL (london, not bladdy lancashire) and my parents were in birmingham. I found that to be far away enough, but in retrospect I would probably have had more fun in a proper campus university.

Anyway, I would never want to live at home whilst being at university - having already boarded for a few years I was used to not having my parents around anyway. I also think that if you're not staying in halls in the first year you are likely to find it difficult to make as many friends as others and end up a bit isolated.

neverdespairgirl

zagubov wrote: »

There's little else to choose between the courses, facilities, standards. She is torn between a very distant and a local one and not sure she's made her mind up yet- it's a close call!

Did any other NPs who went to HE go local or far away?

I was brought up in SE London, and went to UCL (central London). My sister did a foundation course at Camberwell Art School, and then her degree at the University of Kent, in Canterbury.

My other sister didn't go to uni, and my brother went to Sussex, near Brighton.

I didn't live at home when I was at UCL. I was in halls for the first year, then a shared flat, but when home in the holidays.

Edited to say - BIL went to Oxford, did his undergrad, then went back there to do medicine as a post-grad, and is still there.

neverdespairgirl

chewmylegoff wrote: »

I went to UCL (london, not bladdy lancashire) and my parents were in birmingham. I found that to be far away enough, but in retrospect I would probably have had more fun in a proper campus university.

When were you at UCL?

lostinrates

chewmylegoff wrote: »

. I also think that if you're not staying in halls in the first year you are likely to find it difficult to make as many friends as others and end up a bit isolated.

I think living in halls is a greater part of the rite of passage: and then a flat share....including a period of time where people fall out/don't gel and learn to cope with that...especially for those who haven't boarded.