Stormybay's Thread a bit of comfort in a hard world

Different_Corner

Stormy
Big sympathys re boiler, been there..over Christmas..two weeks..no hot water, heating, won't bore you but safe to say that was a very low point. Hope you get it sorted easily.
I'm okay, can only describe it has still a little tender as we approach the first anniversary. Making little changes in my life that make me feel better, if I'm okay the kids are okay. They never cease to amaze me though.
Sary I hope the move went well, really wish you everything you wish for yourself.
Hope you all have a good BH weekend.

sarymclary

Hello,

Wishing you well for your 1st anniversary DC. They don't necessarily get easier, but you do get used to dealing with them better as time goes by. How are you coping generally now with day to day living, finances, etc.?

Stormy - argh! boilers are a nightmare. I was like DC one year when mine broke down 2 days before Christmas, and we were beyond skint at the time too, but had to find over £100 for a small component that needed fixing. I got insurance on it after that!

Well, I have finally moved in, and I thought it might be strange to share a house again after so many years, but actually, it's really nice. We have both lived on our own for a few years, so I think we are both keen to ensure each other (ie. ourselves too) get some quiet time to just potter and do our own thing. I like to listen to my music, and have a mooch on MSE, he likes to potter in his garage, etc. It's a good balance. The children act like they've lived here forever, and are very happy too. The physical move itself has been totally knackering, as we did it all ourselves, but the exercise has done me good! Now I'm just going through the slow process of wading through the boxes to decide what I really need to keep, and trying to be ruthless and get stuff thrown away, off to charity or freecycled.

I never thought I'd find someone I could share my life with in the way I did my DH. I think I spent the first few years I've been with my BF constantly comparing, but that's really unrealistic. I was a different person all those years ago, and have found the right person for me now and into the future. There is a peace in my life now that I haven't had in a long time, and I am finally able to have some stability in my life, which is what I've wanted all along. Even with DH he was contantly onto a new project, there was always big changes or challenges for us as a family, if often meant living apart while he worked, had me travelling to/fro abroad with young children etc., and he was dreadful with money, so there were big debts for me to tidy up, so whilst there were lots of lovely 'highs', the lows were significant, and long-lasting. I am hoping to just settle quietly now, and that will do me just fine!

Hoping you all have a good bank holiday - the forecast isn't going to be too bad so I understand, so fingers crossed! Thinking of you all.

S xxx

Different_Corner

Hi all

Sary, it sounds good. Comfortable. Aware of each others needs. I'm glad you've found happiness.

Me, we made it through. Close family and friends been around for the past couple of weeks. Yesterday was the anniversary of the funeral. You can't help but relive those moments can you ? I do remember that the the next day was the lowest of the low.

Financially it's still a bit of a struggle. Can cope until things like leccy bills drop on the mat. My budgeting skills really aren't finely tuned. Got my eyes open for a better job. But things are quite scary out there aren't they ? If you've got a job it's best to stay put seems to be the feeling.

Anyway I 'm on a short OU course, have been giving the house a bit of a lick with my primeval DIY skills am secretly proud of myself. Think the kids are too.

On a mission to improve our quality of life, do one little job a day that's been hanging around, be it clear out the shed, or clean the fish filter. Slowly but surely.

Hope you are all okay.

sarymclary

DC, it sounds like you are doing really well. Accepting that there will be low points, particularly around anniversaries (or when an old song pops up on radio 2 for me more often). The beginning of May is the anniversary of my DH's funeral. Monday this week would have been my 18th wedding anniversary, the 22nd May was the 19th anniversary of our getting engaged.... and so it goes on. You never forget, you just learn to remember with fondness, not sadness.

The night before last I dreamt DH was still alive, and we were still living our life, etc., but I was totally confused in the dream, as I felt my loyalties were split, as somewhere in the background I'd left my BF behind. I was relieved to wake up. As much as I like dreaming about him, because that's where he's still able to 'live', and I feel it's like he visits me (if that doesn't sound too wierd), but I don't like the odd ones.

DC you sound like you're tackling your jobs a bit like me, bit by bit, slowly but surely. I find that sometimes the most subtle of changes, like de-cluttering, or just moving the furniture around, or just a blummin good clean up can make the most positive benefits.

I gave up going through the boxes any further. There's just not enough room in the house here to put all our stuff in, and we need to redecorate, re-jig, and declutter in order to accommodate more. Jobs I'll need the BF to help out with, so they can wait a while. In the meantime I've been tackling the garden, which was just a bit of a barren mess, and have transformed it into a lovely little oasis, where the whole family like to go sit and spend some time.

The forecast looks to be lovely again this weekend, so I hope everyone gets to enjoy it.

S xx

Stormybay

Hello All,
DC, you are doing really really well, you should be proud of yourself, especially for doing all those little/big jobs that need doing.
I'm having a rubbish time at the moment, the company I work for have not won a contract that they were bidding for, so I'm unsure of my future employment now, and as you sad DC, the climate is difficult at the moment. But at least Rosie has had her dream holiday in the US, so I'm happy about that.
Right, off to take her to football practice, have a lovely sunny weekend
Stormy
xxxxxx

AnW'sMum

Hi all

DC you have done extremely well and I couldn't agree more about step by step. It's 3 years next Saturday sine Ian died and I'm not sure what to do as there will not be school/work to distract us. Last weekend was our wedding anniversary, the first on a Saturday since we got married and despite having a busy day planned I could not help the clock watching 'at this time we were doing this'

The kids have been off school this week and we sorted through the clothes and part of that meant folding some of Ian's clothes away into a box for the loft. I still can't bear to part with them but the act of folding them away was made wasy by virtue of the fact that it was part of a regular job of clothes sorting for us all.

I am really pleased things are going well for you sary and hugs for you Stormy and Rosie. It's never easy is it but job worries at a time like this are made even worse. I hope it all works out for you, glad to see Rosie is still enjoying football.

Better go and get Alice and William ready for swimming, last session so the floats will be out today.

Hope you all have a good weekend, don't forget the sun cream if you are outside. xx

Stormybay

Hi AnWsMum, how are you, how did last weekend go, I so hope all was ok for you, I was thinking of you, as I think of all of us from time to time, and especially at times of my own anniversaries.
With regards to my job, I was really upset last week, but I brought myslef round, by have a quick flick through this thread again, and thinking "hey Stormy, look what you and all the other people have survived, this is easy peasy compared with that!!!"
So.................here we all go, onwards and upwards, today is my birthday, and I've decided to spend it, for the first part anyway, alone and reflective, and so far, I've smiled to myself many times, with past memories, and future plans, so all is well. I'm sure somewhere, my Mum, Dad and John are all wishing me a lovely day, and for that reason, I will enjoy it
Love to you all today and every day, that we go forward and the memories from the past just get better, as we thank whoever, that brought us our late loved ones, to have made sure we had these lovely memories, and made us the strong ones to go on.....
Happy June 5th to whoever you are, wherever you are ....
Stormy
xxxxxx

rog2

Stormybay wrote: »

So.................here we all go, onwards and upwards, today is my birthday, and I've decided to spend it, for the first part anyway, alone and reflective, and so far, I've smiled to myself many times, with past memories, and future plans, so all is well. I'm sure somewhere, my Mum, Dad and John are all wishing me a lovely day, and for that reason, I will enjoy it

I hope you do find time to enjoy your birthday, stormy. :bdaycake:

Stormybay

Aw rog2, thank you so much, just had a lovely soak in the bath, have bought a new outfit and am going for a meal tonight with great company

AnW'sMum

Hi Stormy

Tomorrow is Ian's 3rd anniversary I just can't believe that 3 years have passed already. It's been a long day at work today but I think I was in the best place as I was kept busy, although I did tell the boss not to give me anything too brain taxing!

I hope you have had a nice day (abliet not the the same without John) and have enjoyed your meal out this evening. John will be so proud of all that you have achieved since he was taken from you.