Stormybay's Thread a bit of comfort in a hard world

AnW'sMum

Keeping_Motivated wrote: »

AnWsMum it seems to have been such a long time after you lost your husband that they had the inquest so no wonder you feel you are reliving it I haven't read all the way back so I don't know why that is your experience but hugs to you xx
Km xx

Thanks, went to get the final death certificate yesterday which was not easy. Seeing it in black and white was very difficult to read. That and the fact that they just leave you in a waiting area whilst they print the copies and its all so matter of fact, who died, when, give us your money, there you go thanks and bye seemed so impersonal. A very good friend came with me so at least I wasn't there alone.

Hope everyone else is doing ok, on the brighter side Ian's daffs are all coming through and it is a riot of yellow

Take care xx

lil_me

((big hugs for AnW'sMum)) never easy collecting those, I know exactly what you mean about the matter of fact way it's handled. Give yourself some time, these are all steps that unfortunately you must take but you need to give yourself time making each one x

cornish_lady

Big hugs to you all, you have all been so brave and I feel like a bit of a coward, as I went up to Scotland for a week, to avoid yet another first (our wedding anniversary)

I went to stay with my father-in law who has been so brave despite losing his wife and his only son in the same year, he is an inspiration to me (as are all of you).

I now need to remember how to cook :rolleyes: as Dad is a retired chef and he has waited on me all week, 3 course dinners every night so the trousers are a bit tight too! It was lovely though.

I need to get rather fitter as my Daughters and I are going to do the "Race for Life" together in July and at the moment the race for the train was rather too much I'm really glad we decided to do it as it's actually something that I'm looking forward to, which makes a change.

sarymclary

Hello All,

I have been thinking about all of you, and just wanted to check in to make sure everyone is OK.

Half term here for my brood, so it's noisy, chaotic, but I like the lie-ins!

Taking the younger 2 off to Liverpool to my goddaughter's 2nd birthday bash, leaving the older teenagers with my BF, although they are self-sufficient, it's just I don't trust my 14 year old one bit!

I'm wishing the weather forecast was better, because I love driving over the pennines in the sunshing, but we won't see them in the rain.

Anyway, hugs and best wishes to you all. Have a good weekend, whatever you're doing.

Sary xx

mandymoo

Hello everyone,

I hope that you are all well.

Where does the time go? not been on here much, but that does`nt mean you are not in my thoughts.

Special thoughts for Shelanne,Stormy,AnW`sMum,Cornish Lady .


Love and hugs to all
mandymoo xxx

smokybabe

Hi,

I remember popping in sometime at the start of this thread many, many moons ago and popping in from time to time for a read but I never thought that I would be posting with my own circumstances.

My OH had been ill for a while with a faulty heart valve, last year involved 3 stays in CCU in Glan Clwyd, 2 angiograms later he was scheduled for surgery at the Manchester Royal Infirmary. He was admitted on the 7th of Feb this year and the op took place the next day. He recovered well from the surgery but on the 2nd day after complained of chest pain and was diagnosed with a partially collapsed lung. Following a spell on a peep mask he became exhausted and was admitted back in to CICU to be put under a tent. An hour later they came back and told me he was simply too exhausted and they had sedated him and started ventilating him and as far as they were all concerned all would be well and they would sort him out and wake him up a few days later.

I came back to Wales and within half an hour of getting home I had a phonecall telling me he had crashed and they needed me to return. They did not think he would survive until I got back but they managed to stabalise him and so began 6 weeks of hell. They diagnosed ARDS http://www.ards.org/

The first week he seemed to be recoverig, his kidneys had failed as well as his lungs but both appeared to be making good progress, they tried several times to wake him up but he had a tube tolerance problem and they had to keep deepening his sedation. The following 4 weeks - looking back, he deteriorated slowly. The staff in the CICU tried everything even unorthodox last ditch things to turn around his condition but in the end he went in to multi organ failure. 6 weeks to the day I gave permission for them to turn off his life support as there was no longer any hope of recovery. They informed me that only the deeper functions of the brain were still working and that even if he recovered (0.01%) chance he would never wake up and could spend months on intensive care until and infection finally took him.

We have 3 children, 3 and a half, 6 and a half and 8 years old. Getting up to see him those weeks were a nightmare on the train and organising someone to pick up the kids from school and look after them until I got home.

I am devastated, and if the kids were not here to make me get up and sort them out daily I don't think I could even see each day through. It all seems so pointless, he was only 56. I really don't know how I am going to cope without him. I am slowly sorting out the financial side of things as it is the only part of our lives that I feel that I have any control over at the moment.


Sorry it's a long post.

Smoky.

boredofbeingathome

Oh Smokybabe. I can only extend my deepest sympathies towards you and your family.
I know the hospital well, and hope that you have been treated well by the staff.
Itis early days i know, and you do the right thing to take each day as it comes.
My thoughts and sympathies are with you and your family.
Bobx

Snaggles

Smokybabe, I am so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine what you are going through. Thinking of you xxx

taxi73

My heart goes out to you Smoky at this very difficult time...you must be so exhausted by all the travelling and worry and little children to look after and your loss.i don't know what to say but am sending hugs for you and your family xx

Triker

Smokybabe, I don't know what to say.......I'm so sorry for your pain and loss.

We're here, we'll listen, anything we can guide and advise on, please say.

love to you and yours. xxxx