Stormybay's Thread a bit of comfort in a hard world

mandymoo

To dear AnW`sMum, William and Alice
Sending you all lots of love and hugs, and may you find comfort and peace, ( I have just read the verdict)
I agree with one of the ladies on the flylady thread "you just had to smile back at Ian with that big happy smile " a wonderful picture.

Love and hugs to you all
Mandymoo xxxx

Shelanne

AnW'sMum, Alice and William, in my thoughts and prayers tonight. (I keep starting to type something else and then delete the words which are so inadequate). Hugs to you all. Shelanne. xxxxxxx

Stormybay

Anw'sMum, I hope you are ok, what else can I say, I'm thinking of you, William and Alice. I hope you have a peaceful night.
Shelanne, how are you coping, am thinking of you so much too.
Lot's ove love
Stormy
xxxxxx

Stormybay

Anw'sMum, I hope you are ok, what else can I say, I'm thinking of you, William and Alice. I hope you have a peaceful night.
Shelanne, how are you coping, am thinking of you so much too.
Lot's ove love
Stormy
xxxxxx

Shelanne

Thanks Stormy, I'm OK I think. Children still seem to be coping fine, though getting a bit concerned about middle one, Christi, she's six has shown no obvious signs of grief at all. She was so close to her Daddy it's puzzling how she carries on so normally. I know she gets so upset when she sees me crying, like all of her security is threatened so she doesn't talk to me or snuggle with me so much (probably terrified to set me off!). I guess she's just not ready to express her feelings yet.

Three weeks without him and I am bereft. I miss him so much, the look of him, the feel of him, his touch, his voice, his presence. O Keith, my love.

Doing Ok on the form filling and practical stuff, lots of help from friends.

Stormybay

Hi Shelanne,
Well done on getting this far. My youngest daughter who was 11 at the time also showed no grief what so ever, the only time she cried, was the day I told her about her dad, which was 2 days before Christmas. Since then, she has just seemed to have got on with life so well. Children are just so resilient, she is an inspiration. She does talk about him quite often. If we see something to remind us of him, she will say, 'oh, dad wouls love that', or 'do you remember when dad did.........?' After about 3 months, she started wanting to sleep with me in my bed, so I let her for a while, then decorated her bedroom, for her to go back to, and she was fine.
The older ones, who were 21, 20, 19 and 16 at the time where very very emotional, and still are on occasions, especially my 19 year old daughter (who is now 20). She's pregnant and so hormonal, she is all over the place, and misses John all the time, and cries at the drop of a hat.
Try not to worry about your 6 year old, and don't worry if you cry in front of her, she will be fine.
3 weeks is such a short time, you will miss Keith terribly and go through all sorts of emotions. I'm often very angry with John for leaving me, then I feel bad and feel so lost, sad and lonely. It's all a very strange situation when your loved one dies, something we are not used to and don't know how to react, so usually, your body and mind just does it for you. There's no right or wrong way, just 'your way'.

AnW'smum, I hope you have found just a little peace this morning, I have my 2 vases of daffodils on my window sill, shining brightly for you and your family, as well as Ians.

Much love to all of you
Stormy
xxxxxx

Shelanne

AnW's mum, still thinking of you, hope you have recovered some of your strength following the ordeal of the inquest. (((((hug))))).

Feeling quite low myself but I'm still here breathing in and out.

Shelanne xxxxxxxxxx

mandymoo

Dear Shelanne,
Thinking of you and the children, and remember there is no right or wrong way only the way that is right for you.

Lots of love and hugs
mandymoo xxx

AnW'sMum

Hi everyone

Starting to get back on an even keel here, I felt mentally and physically drained over the weekend. We 3 just played together and had a good time ending up at McDonalds for tea on Sunday night I explained it all to Alice including the reports in the press. She was extremely upset, it was like telling her all over again but as ever she seems to be doing really well and no one has given her a hard time at school.

Been thinking of you Shelanne, as Stormy says you are doing really well. It is still such a short time since Keith died. I know for me it took weeks and weeks before I seemed to settle into a pattern and this new normality that is forced upon us all. But you will get there and are doing so well so far.

Have you managed to get all the forms completed, give any of us a shout if there is anything you are not sure of.

Stormy, not long now to the new baby arriving, bet you are all getting excited. Been thinking of you all recent;y. How's Rosie doing with the football?

Take care everyone xx

Stormybay

Hello everyone, just thought I'd nip in quickly whilst I have my tea break in work.
I hope everyone is ok after the wind and rain. Rosie's Guinea Pig hutch seems to still be in tact in the back garden and the shed roof is still attached!
Anyway, how are you all? Shelanne and AnW'sMum, I hope you are managing to cope one day at a time, it must be so difficult for your both. Shelanne, it is such early days for you and you must congratulate yourself for getting by and surviving hour by hour. AnW'sMum, it must be so awful for you re-living the nighmare all over again. I hope you, the family and the children are all ok.
I am meeting the solicitor with regards to John hopefully sometime this month. It's a little awkward as I am in Norht Wales and he is in the south, but hopefully, something may get moving then. At the moment, we have requested John's hospital records, but there seems to be some sort of delay in finding them!!!!
Apart from that, I jusst seem to be getting on with things, I have started sorting out the house and have taken a couple of days off after Easter to try and sort out John's clothing and stamp stuff, I have promised Rosie his bedroom furniture, so I have to do it now. I have also but together 2 MFI bookshelves the other night, and am very pleased with it.
Lately, I've also started to feel a little lonely. I'm not sure if this is normal or what. During the past 15 months, I haven't had time to feel lonely and my head has been full of what happend and I was constantly thinking of John, or making sure the children were allright, buying houses or having holidays, just generally keeping busy.......... Now I seem to find loneliness creeping, the sort of lonliness that you need when you get home form work and need someone to chat to, someone to smile at you and tell you that you look nice, or a hug from a man............you now what I mean. Having these thoughts also makes me feel guilty, like I'm cheating on John....God, the diffiulties seem to arise at whatever stage you are at diesn't it..?
Does anyone have any experience of these sorts of emotions out there???

Hold on tight everyone, keep moving forward one inch at a time, you are all doing so great, thank you for everything, hold your heads up high, we are survivors
Have a good day if possible,
Love and hugs to all
Stormy
xxxxxx