Daughter is pregnant - at 15!

Bettybigboobs

Do we know who the dad is yet?

peachyprice

No.......................

WelshBluebird

Errata wrote: »

And do precisely what with the knowledge? Have mass said every Thursday? Sit shiva for a week?

This isn't about the purpose of it. Its about what is right and wrong. As I said, if it was consensual, then the father deserves to know. It is his "baby" as much as hers.

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

Sometimes people are better off not knowing things for their own good.

Sometimes yes. I do not think its the case here.

Person_one wrote: »

Why? What good comes of him knowing that he helped to create a pregnancy that was then aborted? I'm genuinely asking because I can see no reason at all why he needs to ever know if she doesn't want him to. Surely we can all agree he doesn't actually get a say in whether the pregnancy is continued or aborted, that's all her decision.

Best case scenario he says "Oh, I'm sorry you had to go through that without my support, but I would have completely respected your decision", no real gain there. Worst case scenario the OP's daughter gets a load of grief from him and his family for no good reason. I wouldn't take the chance if I were a pregnant 15 year old and not 100% sure I could count on my boyfriend's love and support. This girl apparently doesn't even have a boyfriend.

As above.
This isn't about the purpose of it. Its about what I personally feel is right and wrong.

Of course, if there is a situation where they think the father / fathers family may try to give her grief, then I would agree with not telling them.

But otherwise, as I said above, its his baby as much as it is hers.

WelshBluebird

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

Welshbluebird


I would worry about a baby that was born and that you did not get to see more than anything else.- now that is morally wrong.

Just because one issue is worth worrying about, it doesn't mean you can't worry about other issues too.
I agree that what you say is a more serious situation though.

I think this is going to be my last most about this particular point as its gone way off topic. I'll still keep an eye out on the thread though .

Bettybigboobs

I personally think a decision should of been made by now, afterall each day the baby is growing, and prolonging the ordeal is "battering" the girls head even more. I also truely believe the father situation should of been sorted also. Its unfair to the mother, not knowing, and also a little disrespectful. However, i do wish the girl well.

Errata

Bluntly - a bloke would know early enough when a woman was pregnant if he was around to hold her head when she was heaving her guts up with morning sickness.

Person_one

WelshBluebird wrote: »

This isn't about the purpose of it. Its about what is right and wrong. As I said, if it was consensual, then the father deserves to know. It is his "baby" as much as hers.

(snip)

But otherwise, as I said above, its his baby as much as it is hers.

They both contributed 50% of the genetic material to the baby, but as long as its in her body, growing in her, taking everything it needs from her and changing her physiology then only her decision carries any weight really.

If the mother has the absolute right to abort the pregnancy without the father's permission, why does she have any obligation to inform him of it?

POPPYOSCAR

WelshBluebird wrote: »

This isn't about the purpose of it. Its about what is right and wrong. As I said, if it was consensual, then the father deserves to know. It is his "baby" as much as hers.



Sometimes yes. I do not think its the case here.



As above.
This isn't about the purpose of it. Its about what I personally feel is right and wrong.

Of course, if there is a situation where they think the father / fathers family may try to give her grief, then I would agree with not telling them.

But otherwise, as I said above, its his baby as much as it is hers.

But it is her body and her mental welfare.

Just what is the point of telling someone you might even hardly know that you are going to have a termination - it could be spread around, she might not want anyone to know - he might give her grief, he might put pressure on her to have the baby against her real feelings, he might then sod off!!

vax2002

There is no such thing as "consensual sex" with a 15 year old child, a person under 16 can not legally give consent, it is know as the age of consent, for crying out loud how many times do some people need to be TOLD.

WelshBluebird

vax2002 wrote: »

There is no such thing as "consensual sex" with a 15 year old child, a person under 16 can not legally give consent, it is know as the age of consent, for crying out loud how many times do some people need to be TOLD.

Legally you are correct. However, morally is another matter. A 15 year old certainly can willingly have sex. If you think 15 year olds do not want sex, then you are very naive.
There is a massive difference between two 15 year olds willingly having sex and someone taking advantage of a child.