Ladies do you receive house keeping from hubby?

LillythePink

How much do you spend on groceries ever week/month?

Do you buy his toileteries?

How much less does he spend out per month to you?

I would cancel his health insurance - if he doesn't agree with it, then fine - he can pay out of his pocket when he is ill as he has so much money

Have you broken down how much each share of everything is? I know that it sounds petty, but have you worked out how much each of you cost? I assume that you get maintenance for your first child but her cost should be worked out as well (just for equality)

If you then see that he is costing you the £60 alone, then you can justify an increase to cover your child with him

I know that you shouldn't have to do all of this, but if he won't listen to you any other way, then what else are you to do?

I would probably leave the house/mortgage alone for the moment - he obviously isn't going to give in, so any "nagging" on that subject will just cause friction between you both.

How do you pay for the christmas/birthday pressies for your children?

Emmzi

feed the family on exactly £60 a week. I have had a look at the sainsbury £50 a week deal and no bloke I know would be happy with it :-)

Obviously then there'll be nothing left for pressies, so lnock that on the head too!

Emmzi

PS I see you say "his DD upkeep". Daughter from previous marriage? Did she fleece him?

Mojisola

BitterAndTwisted wrote: »

YOU PAY MORE OF THE HOUSEHOLD BILLS THAN YOUR HUSBAND DOES DESPITE EARNING LESS MONEY. You need him to increase your housekeeping by a substantial amount and if he doesn't he needs to start paying more of the bills. Leave him to pay all of the utilities at the very least. Stand firm and tell him that you cannot continue as you are at present. If he thinks you're a "kept woman" now just give up your job and be one.

He really needs a wake-up call or this could be the start of the end of the relationship. Now you've woken up to what's going on, you won't be able to accept it any longer.

make_me_wise

We have 3 joint accounts and some seperate accounts. One account pays all the bills which we have set up by direct debit, this covers everything; utilities, council tax, phones, sky, tv licence, broadband, car and home insurance. We also pay in extra to cover yearly expenses like car tax and a back up amount for when MOTs come round.

Then we have a spend account to cover food and petrol. Our other joint account we use to save for any big things we want like holidays etc. Into all the joint accounts we pay the same amount each.

The rest of our salaries we put into our own accounts and we can do what we like with. I like my own independance and dont want to feel like I am taking from a joint pot of money if I feel like getting my hair/nails etc done or splashing out on some girly thing. We trust each other not to go mad and spend recklessly and get into any debt.

I guess it helps that we earn similar amounts and so just split everything 50/50.

Mojisola

Like others have said - forget the mortgage and deeds at the moment. Work on getting him to see how unfair he is being with the weekly money.

savingmummy

I don`t work and my husband dont give me any money, BUT he pays for everything obviously!

When i was working we did half of everything ie, bills split THEN whatever was left was `ours`.

Miss_Marple_2

My OH earns more than me - my salary is what I would call average and he earns about 3 times more than me. We don't have children.

We worked out how much our bills would be in total each month (including food), then he pays in 75% of that and me 25% (in line with our salaries). We each then keep a separate account for doing our own thing - I like this as if I buy him a present or whatever, he doesn't know in advance how much I paid & where I got it from ! We also make savings from our own accounts, but we have joint savings as well

As you are married, I'm not sure what your husband things he's gaining by not putting you on the mortgage, also £60 per month is really mean. I would make a list of your out goings in a month and present it to him. Also, if it has been £60 for a while, show him what prices are like now compared to a year ago. Basically - get all your facts & figures at your fingertips, then he can't deny that there is a problem. If he refuses, show him where you will be cutting down ( i.e. on anything that you spend that in anyway benefits him)

If you are contributing more money to the household, yet he earns more, this is really not acceptable and is making me mad just thinking about it :mad:

ViolaLass

I'm shocked at the idea that your OH gives you money for his child but not for the other. Surely that doesn't follow the principles of good step-parenting? You should be both raising these children together.

MrandMrsB

All our money goes into our joint account, and we each have £20 per month pocket money. I (Mrs keep the household accounts and look after our bank / savings accounts.