Ladies do you receive house keeping from hubby?

pimento

Not being a sexist, I work and my husband (never a "hubby", I hate that word, makes him sound like a cuddly toy) doesn't.

My money goes into a joint account and he can draw from it as required.

We're married, what's mine is his and vice versa. There is no mine and his, it's ours.

pigpen

Sounds like he is being a tightwad and keeping you controlled

We had a joint account.. everything went in.. the bills came out, the childrens needs were met then whatever was left either stayed there or was spent on the house or stuff we wanted.. days out etc..

If either of us wanted a specific thing it was discussed and budgetted for.

I did have the responsibility of doing the actually paying of the bills etc but at least we knew they were paid... food was bought and nothing was ever missed.

With OH I pay everything and he has £50 a week which goes towards his credit card/overdraft/fuel/subs for his stuff.

shelley_crow

pimento wrote: »

Not being a sexist, I work and my husband (never a "hubby", I hate that word, makes him sound like a cuddly toy) doesn't.

My money goes into a joint account and he can draw from it as required.

We're married, what's mine is his and vice versa. There is no mine and his, it's ours.

exactly how we do it in our house. I would find being given - or having to give - housekeeping money demeaning. Money goes into one account and we both draw from it accordingly.

I know of relationships where one partner pays for x and another pays for y but it seems a disjointed way of doing things, life's too short.

Errata

It's a great pity that people who are partners don't deal with matters as a partnership and joint venture, because that's all that running a family home and family is.

threemuttleys

We both get "pocket money" here...Everything gets worked out on the budget planner (paper and on PC...I really am that sad) and of what is left 1/3 goes into savings and the rest we spilt between us to do with as we please. I dont have access to the main account (cant be trusted:o) but I have the grocery, Childcare, pet and Money for our DS into my account

Darlyd

OK I have had a chat with him, never lasted long. I said when we married we did nothing official, such as having a joint bank account, he said I know where this is going, I said look, Why can't we have a joint account, have all our money paid in, pay all the bills and what is left put some into a savings and split for our pocket money. He said a BIG NOOOOO. Actually he said to me, I earn more than you, my bills are paid, your a kept woman. Omg this so got my goat, I am not a kept woman, I asked him for more money every week then, he said He gives me enough now, not his fault I spend it all. ? I spend it all on shopping !!!!!!. I only earn £400-£600 (a month) paid monthly (I am a care worker, half hour calls here and there, which messes the day) He gives me £60 a week. Oh come on. Then I went on and said Why can't you put me on your mortgage, he also said a big noo. I just walked away saying "this is why, this is why". ( I am pulling my hair out, so better off on my own, both financially and mentally, from sheer frustration).

My mum bless her, has sent me a parcel (I just opened it) and it has an outfit each for the girls and a few notes for me. She so feels sorry for me.

LittleMissMPB

Lol - my OH's card lives in my purse. Occasionally he will ask me how much money he has lmao, but he gets a lot more money than me and he hates shopping. Even for clothes. Anything he buys for himself is always ordered online or he asks me to pick it up next time I'm that way... but he will always ask if the children need anything first and put them ahead.

However, in my logic of saving money - I get £140 a week, so I try not to use his card at all at the moment. The only times I will need it that I can plan for are things like buying a highchair, childrens clothes when needed, MOT on the car etc. Also the bills come out of his account, car insurance, rent, council tax, phone/broadband, water bill, gas bill.

I suppose I'm lucky that my OH is really laid back when it comes to money. He is very good at organising it and if I ask for help budgeting he will if I show him where the money is going, but he's happy for me to be in control of it. I do regularly get told I spend too much on the weekly shop (I like buying crisps and yummy stuff too) and that if he did it he would get what we needed and nothing else - so I suggested he do it - he laughed and said no as I would be miserable - eta the weekly shop is now down to £45, including 'yummies' and nappies.

HappyMJ

Then don't buy the shopping. Feed yourself and ignore him. Buy him beans on toast maybe. He'll probably stop the £60 a week so stop paying the electric bill and let it be cut off. It won't be it'll just become a prepayment meter. Are you prepared for a war.....

pigpen

And you backed down?! For goodness sake.. you back down he has won nothing changes.. tell him if he is so independant he can buy his own food etc... You don't just accept what he is saying it because it is him and he will kickoff..

tell him to go do the monthly shop and he can start paying for it because you aren't doing it an more until he grows up and stops being such a greedy skintflint and realises his family need more in the cupboards.

How exactly are you a 'kept woman' if you are working and also paying for everything.. in what way are you kept?????

You are now sounding like it should say 'welcome' on your back!!!! Go hassle him some more..

anderson8

darlyd wrote: »

OK I have had a chat with him, never lasted long. I said when we married we did nothing official, such as having a joint bank account, he said I know where this is going, I said look, Why can't we have a joint account, have all our money paid in, pay all the bills and what is left put some into a savings and split for our pocket money. He said a BIG NOOOOO. Actually he said to me, I earn more than you, my bills are paid, your a kept woman. Omg this so got my goat, I am not a kept woman, I asked him for more money every week then, he said He gives me enough now, not his fault I spend it all. ? I spend it all on shopping !!!!!!. I only earn £400-£600 (a month) paid monthly (I am a care worker, half hour calls here and there, which messes the day) He gives me £60 a week. Oh come on. Then I went on and said Why can't you put me on your mortgage, he also said a big noo. I just walked away saying "this is why, this is why". ( I am pulling my hair out, so better off on my own, both financially and mentally, from sheer frustration).

My mum bless her, has sent me a parcel (I just opened it) and it has an outfit each for the girls and a few notes for me. She so feels sorry for me.

i wouldnt worry about not being on the mortgage, doesnt make much difference if youre married.
id be livid if i were in your shoes.