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SAHM paying off debts slowly

edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Debt Free Diaries
889 replies 80.3K views
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  • Honeysucklelou2Honeysucklelou2 Forumite
    2.9K posts
    1,000 Posts Fourth Anniversary Name Dropper
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    Well done on fitting the bike stands! My ex used to do all the DIY stuff so I find my DIY victories are much celebrated !
    paydbx2020 #93 £1765.42/£10,025 . 1 debt 100 days 35 £493/£1820
    EF £160 . SPC 141
    # savings# £63 . Savings 2 £51 H2S £187.50
  • slm6002slm6002 Forumite
    2K posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Debt-free and Proud!
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    I am very proud of myself with any little DIY job done.  The window man has been and managed to open both of the big windows and yes i need a new part for the locking system.  Didn't say how much they were but said it was a simple job so hoping not too much.  I was so excited they were open that i forgot about prices.  I asked him to leave my bedroom window open and now need to hope the weather doesn't change too much before he comes back to mend them.  I know its a little cooler today but can already feel the difference upstairs.
    I'm hoping that we might leave the house tomorrow and do something even if its only for a little while. DD needs to take some pictures for her art lesson so we might take a trip to local museum where we can walk around the field and tick some homework off the list at the same time as getting some fresh air
    Me, DD 15, DS 12, DD 9
    FW Nerd 1103, Debt Free 04/18
    Single Mum since 11/19
  • slm6002slm6002 Forumite
    2K posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Debt-free and Proud!
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    Hi all, can i first apologise for the lack of summer since the windows were opened lol.  Its a little cooler and wetter isn't it.  Still enjoying the fresh air in the bedroom though.  Window men still haven't returned but hopefully will soon.
    Kids went to OH at the weekend, but had to collect DS as he will being sick and wanted me to look after him rather than his dad.  Not surprised as OH has never taken care of any of the kids if they have been ill before.  I didn't mind as it was nice for us to spend some time together and the next day he was fine.  The first thing DD said on her return was that OH cant afford to live in his caravan on site anymore so will be living in a different caravan in his dad and step mums front garden from end of sept.  DD was not happy as not keen on his family.  Anyway, he has also resigned and will be back on the road in his lorry in the next week or so, so new dog will be left with his step mum and he can see her at weekend.  That responsibility didn't last long!  Anyway according to OH its more money so things should improve.  Feel that he is seeing grass was not greener on the other side, and living costs money!
    Right enough about him, i have been thinking about getting the house ready for winter, especially as after the rain i have a dripping gutter above the back door.  It is probably blocked as i don't believe OH has ever cleared them (Its an outside job so i had to leave it for him!).  Anyway as i am not keen on heights my brother has offered to climb the ladder and see whats going on up there.  He is good at DIY so if anything is needed he should be able to help.  I have asked the winter preppers if there is anything else i need to be doing on the outside of the house as things have not been done in the past 15 years.  I dont want any surprises later on in the winter if it could have been prevented.

    Me, DD 15, DS 12, DD 9
    FW Nerd 1103, Debt Free 04/18
    Single Mum since 11/19
  • Kitten868Kitten868 Forumite
    1.5K posts
    Fifth Anniversary 1,000 Posts
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    You are organised! Isn't it amazing how quick we can get things done when it's only you to answer to. I did have a passing thought about cutting back the lavender at the end of the month. That's as far as I got xxx
    Loan 1 £5400/£8000
    Loan 2 £1200/£5800
    Total £6600/£13800 52% PAID
  • slm6002slm6002 Forumite
    2K posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Debt-free and Proud!
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    I have lavender so will add that to the list.  Used to make lavender bags with my gran she her garden was full of it.  Maybe a little project for me and the kids, although maybe small as only a few pots of it.  My neighbor has taken over the gardening side although i feel as if its taking advantage of him sometimes even though i know when they downsized a few years ago he lost his huge garden that he loved, so doing mine as well he loves it.  If we move one day however he will not be there to look after it, so i need to learn now.  Forgot to say yesterday that when OH was here at the weekend i made sure the garage door was open to get the kids sports kit they needed out.  That way i was able to show off how tidy and organised the garage was lol.  I'm so naughty.
    Me, DD 15, DS 12, DD 9
    FW Nerd 1103, Debt Free 04/18
    Single Mum since 11/19
  • Important update! We have recently reviewed and updated our Forum Rules and FAQs. Please take the time to familiarise yourself with the latest version.
  • slm6002slm6002 Forumite
    2K posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Debt-free and Proud!
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    The next set of forms have just been sent off to the divorce people so the nisi should be coming in the next 8 to 10 weeks!  The paperwork arrived a little before i was expecting it so hopefully the timings of 8 weeks is a over estimate of how long it may take for the next stage to be ticked off.  I received them about half 2 and by 3 they were in the post being sent back.  No hanging around my end that's for sure.
    Got our weekly food parcel with some great ingredients in, but again I don't think the kids will eat the recipes they have provided with them.  Plenty of alternative things i can make so not to waste anything.  Miserable weather here at the moment.  Really hoping it improves for next week as we are away for a few days.  The beach will not seem so appealing if its raining and cold.
    Me, DD 15, DS 12, DD 9
    FW Nerd 1103, Debt Free 04/18
    Single Mum since 11/19
  • slm6002slm6002 Forumite
    2K posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Debt-free and Proud!
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    Hello to you all.  I've been away for a while and then trying to catch up on a whole load of threads.  Think i am almost back up to date with things now.  Me and the kids went away for our sun holiday.  Major step for me driving to a destination that was unknown to me - we had the sat nav and it worked well for us.  Feeling brave enough to go a little further afield next time.  Although the weather was wet and very windy we had some great family fun.  We social distanced most of the time, but the parks restaurant lacked much distancing going on, partly i'm guessing, because of the mon to wed cheap meal deals .  After 2 nights we stayed away from it as the kids were not comfortable with so many people in a confined space.  We ordered in takeaway and cooked ourselves and avoided the crowded places. We spent hardly anything as i had taken some food with us and entertainment.  We went to the beach in the wind and rain (and still had great fun), used the parks pool (covid rules applied and we were limited to time), and explored the local area.  Also treated them to a couple of games of 10 pin bowling and mini golf - our only really expense.  Anyway cant wait for next year now.  I told them they could tell daddy what fun we got up to (while they were waiting to be collected).  DS said he wouldn't as daddy doesn't save his money so might get upset he couldn't do fun things like that with them.  DS knows the value of money but really didn't see how little we spent making our own fun.  Quite sweet really.  
    I think we are ready for the return to school and work.   I am happy with the primary school, but fear the high school procedures may not keep the kids from harm.  We will see how long before they are working from home again.  I was given my work hours today and rather than 2 full days and 2 half days i have 3 full days, keeping the same hours as before.  I am required to go into the office, but think there will be lots of keeping out of the way for the majority of time.  Looking forward to 2 full days off work to sort house out and birthdays / christmas things once the kids are back at school, as i am nowhere near ready like i would normally be by now.
    Anyway i hope you are all ok and snuggled under blankets.  Now off to finish catching up on threads.
    Me, DD 15, DS 12, DD 9
    FW Nerd 1103, Debt Free 04/18
    Single Mum since 11/19
  • slm6002slm6002 Forumite
    2K posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Debt-free and Proud!
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    Well today i returned to work after having 6 months off.  I wont lie it has been a struggle to get me and the kids out of bed in preparation for this week but we did it.  The day went ok, but really there are not many ways to stop virus arriving in our setting other than the usual washing hands and hoping parents don't send sick children in.  We have done as much as we can following the guidelines/  Older 2 go back to school tomorrow.  Still unsure of how safe it really is but will send them and keep our fingers crossed that if there are any cases the school take action.
    It does mean i am working normal hours and September is a full month of hours so next payday will look much better than the previous couple of months.  Today is payday and the only hours included are holiday pay.  Due to the previous months low hours the holiday pay was also lower than before
    Tomorrow i am off shopping for bday and xmas bits.  May meet up for coffee with a good friend.
    Me, DD 15, DS 12, DD 9
    FW Nerd 1103, Debt Free 04/18
    Single Mum since 11/19
  • slm6002slm6002 Forumite
    2K posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Debt-free and Proud!
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    Good evening to you all.  Well work is going ok.  Lots of restrictions in place although still some risks as no masks etc allowed.  The children's schools are mixed re safety.  DD2 is at primary and i think their safety is as good as it can be, but DD1 and DS school lacks quite a lot re safety.  I guess we just need to be positive and keep fingers crossed.
    The divorce is still going through.  7 weeks after it being submitted to the courts i still have not heard when judge will review nisi.  The divorce people are chasing it but after 2 days still no word.  I am hoping the courts don't close down again, or it will take even longer.  OH still dragging his heals on handing over his pension amounts - to be honest i doubt if he has even started looking at them as yet.
    He moved into his dads front garden on DD's bday weekend.  They spent the weekend with him while he cleaned previous caravan and were plonked in front of the tv the entire time.  If i had known i would have kept them home and done something nice for her bday.  Anyway the state of the new caravan has made DD1 say she will not be staying overnight, so it looks like they will just spend every other sunday with him.  I don't think any of them are particularly worried about missing time with him. We shall see - i am only going by what DD1 tells me as OH has been ignoring my calls and texts for over a month now.  Oh and the other day after a lot of nagging and asking by DD1 (saying she obviously wouldn't be able to trust her dad anymore if he didn't tell her the truth) he has admitted seeing the married woman we knew he was seeing all along.  At some point in the next few years she will file for her divorce and eventually they will be together.  'But don't tell your mum' lol.  Of course she did.  We all know he had been lying to us, his family and his friends.  It was so obvious it is crazy.  He had said and made me feel like i was the one who had made his life so miserable that he wanted to take his own life.  He made me feel like that rather than just admit he was sleeping with someone else.  I so want to tell her husband, but cant until everything is signed and sorted, and then only if i have the nerve.  I really want mutual 'friends' and family who believe his story (that i'm a really awful person) to know i wasn't making things up, and he has lied to them all.  I wont be taking 'friends' back as i know who are my true friends.
    Anyway sorry for rant - i am still feeling very bitter about it all as you can probably tell lol.
    Money wise, things are going well.  I am hoping to start up a universal credits savings account.  I had to wait for a full working month before i earnt enough.  This month i managed it so can apply.  The interest is great over the 4 years.  I am still looking at moving house but i keep falling in love with them and then they sell.  I cant move until after divorce is sorted.  I know i shouldn't look until then, but i just want my 'new start' to be able to begin.
    I am off to bed as kids have activities in the morning.  Sorry to have posted such a long negative ranty post.  Positivity will resume soon :)
    Me, DD 15, DS 12, DD 9
    FW Nerd 1103, Debt Free 04/18
    Single Mum since 11/19
  • Four_SeasonsFour_Seasons Forumite
    3 posts
    First Post
    MoneySaving Newbie
    Hi, I have read your diary from front to back and you are a good strong women and an excellent mother you should be very proud of yourself. sending you hugs!!
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