Relationship advice needed - boyfriend hasn't moved in

Mupette

what is it mother in law doesn't like about you to disown her own son over?

Amy_1984

I don't think it's me. My bf's older brother lives at home with his wife and baby. They announced a few weeks ago that they were planning on moving out and his mother did the exact same thing. So far, they haven't moved out either.

the_cat

Well, speaking bluntly I wouldn't want him to move in now anyway!

Either he is a grown man who puts his relationship first and wants to set up a home together properly or he is an overgrown child still doing what his mummy tells him to! His actions have proved which he is.

You deserve a man, not a little boy

go_cat

Amy_1984 wrote: »

I don't think it's me. My bf's older brother lives at home with his wife and baby. They announced a few weeks ago that they were planning on moving out and his mother did the exact same thing. So far, they haven't moved out either.

Sounds like mummy doesn't want an empty nest and is using any excuse to stop them leaving

Sooner or later one of the sons has to stand up to her wether you wait around for your BF to get the courage is up to you it could take a while

Pollycat

Amy_1984 wrote: »

What's everyone's advice if he chooses his family and refuses to pay anymore?

Thank your lucky stars that you didn't end up with someone who thought so little about you that he chose his mother over you.
You'd have had a lucky escape.

Then look for a lodger.

Amy_1984 wrote: »

I don't think it's me. My bf's older brother lives at home with his wife and baby. They announced a few weeks ago that they were planning on moving out and his mother did the exact same thing. So far, they haven't moved out either.

She sounds a right controlling mare.

Does she really expect to tie her 2 sons to her apron strings for the rest of their lives?

What does her husband have to say about it?

Actually, I've just re-read your first post and something stands out:

Amy_1984 wrote: »

I don't want to issue an ultimatum as I'm worried he would leave me with all of the rent to pay. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Are you really sure he's the one for you?

Someone in love would be worried about losing the person they love - not about how they will manage financially.

onlyroz

I had been married for two years by age 24. Your fella needs to make his intentions clear, and stop pandering to mummy's wishes. Either he's going to move in or not. If not then you need to find yourself a flatmate.

pinkshoes

He's 24, not 14, so he needs to just move out, and tell his mother she's more than welcome to come round for sunday lunch every weekend!

the_cat

pinkshoes wrote: »

He's 24, not 14, so he needs to just move out, and tell his mother she's more than welcome to come round for sunday lunch every weekend!

:eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek: Jeez, how often!!!!:rotfl::rotfl:

Every few months sounds like quite often enough in the circumstances!

heretolearn_2

Mummy's boy. I doubt he is going to change. Give him one last chance - he stands up to mummy once and for all, or that's it. Otherwise in 5 years time you'll still be sitting in your flat alone wondering when he'll move in.

NExt time he comes round have that Ronnie Corbett comedy 'sorry' on dvd to watch, about a mummys boy who lives at home age 40. Offer to buy him a nice beige car coat.

IT's sad but there are men who live like this. I know of one over 40 years old, never had a real relationship, you'd think he was his mum's husband, all he does is 'old people stuff' with her (no offence to older people, most I know don't do that stuff either, but you know what I mean).

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Amy_1984 wrote: »

Generally, the Council Tax office want proof that the person has moved out - I had this problem with a previous flatmate. Plus, there are still two of us on the lease.

What's everyone's advice if he chooses his family and refuses to pay anymore?

Tell them he never moved in and is still living at the place where he is on the electoral roll. They can call and ask his Mummy and she will probably tell them that he wouldn't dream of leaving her.

On the second point, I would say count that as a lucky escape - after all, what would happen if you were to start a family? Either she would demand that he leave you or the child would never be your own.