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Erme wrote: »
Okay I don't see the big deal here that can't be jazzed up with accesories? Some of my church clothes (and yes you offended and hurt my feelings excrutiatingly for using the 'c' word and taking my Lord's name in vain in the above post by Quantic last posted to this) I've had for 10 years and then they were only £1 in a charity shop. Really don't see the prob.....unless it's about trying to keep up with the 'joneses' which is so not worth it..
That is just crazeeeee!!!!. Such a pathetic reason to study. If only I was well enough to study. Boy...that makes my blood boil.
So yeah. Maybe I don't have the fancy job like you do but am just decorating my pad (first time in 10 years. Was an exchange) and noticed B&Q last weekend @ least had 3 for 2 on paint and 10% off if you spent more than £30 for a few weeks (you got a coupon)...so yeah....it's possible...
Compromise and go for the cheaper alternative if possible. One of my aquaintances has not has his LBM and is now on JSA and finding things tough (less than 10% of what he was on)...I told him not to not go for his coffees out but have them cheaper. He ignored me....:mad:
spykey_uk wrote: »
I can totally sympathise with the OP here. We have drifted away from some of my OH's friends who have acted very similarly to the OP's.
They would not accept that we couldn't afford to do the things that they wanted to do and took it as a personal attack on them. Even when we suggested that we do cheaper things, they would ignore those suggestions and then act as if we were being bad friends for not spending money on lavish days out with them.
Similarly, one of the couples lives with their parents (her with her parents and him with his) and have just fallen pregnant. She isn't working and he earns a low wage and yet they are still spending money on holidays. In the last year, they have been to the Caribbean, New York, Paris and Dublin - places we can only dream of. We haven't had a holiday for years, even in the UK. They have booked a holiday to Las Vegas the month after the baby is due and are planning on leaving the baby with her parents. It upsets us so much because we have been desperate for a family ever since we got married but are trying to get debt-free before doing so. They have openly said that they are just planning on getting a council flat and (as they aren't married) just putting her name on the tenancy so that it will all be free and they won't take her partner's income into it.
We fell out with them mainly because our morals conflicted, but also because they couldn't accommodate our needs or understand that we don't have the same "throw-away" attitude to money that they do. We incurred our debts through university study, and a few reckless decisions when we were younger, but are now very sensible (and in their eyes "boring") and are trying to get rid of our debt so that we can buy a house and start a family.
I have to say, if the friends won't accept that you can't spend money like they do, they probably never were friends in the first place. The sad thing about my story is that we ignored a great group of friends for years because the friends who couldn't understand our frugality also demanded a lot of our time and kicked up such a fuss if we couldn't see them (whereas the good friends never said a word). The happy ending to that story is that we are back in touch with our good friends, who totally understand the need to save money and pay off debt.
I hope this all makes sense!
quantic wrote: »
I might be old fashioned, but I like the idea of BEING married, not GETTING married. To me, It is a day to commit to my OH for life, not a spectacle to show how well we are doing.
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