Nearly 30, in debt, lost and nervous! I need to change.

Lost_and_nervous

I am having a sort through. I am having a sort through of the things which I need to sell that are out at the moment, then I can move on to another place after. I have emailed ebay again as they said I have no limits on my account but its the allowance of items I can sell which is the problem. I just hope they take pity on me. I really do.

I saved a £1 on car park the other day! the barriers were up so I wasnt going to stop!

I gave myself a pamper last night, just a small one, but I am fed up of always being so run down looking so its time I sort myself out and make myself feel better about me. It didnt really work but its a working progress.

I have so much to do and so little time to do it in. But its ok its all a working progress!

I have joined a free bingo website, you get given credits everyday and then when you have enough you can get things like tesco vouchers. I am thinking if there are anymore as I could do this whilst I am at home. Something to look into, every little helps.

Have a good weekend! xxx

girlatplay

Lost_and_nervous wrote: »

but is it that I am making a 'meal' out of it and that actually if I sit back and put a plan into place with achievable small tasks which are going to change the immediate but work towards the future.


My aim is to achieve small little teeny tiny goals. To work towards my big goal - be debt free. xx

Yes!!!! Put a plan into place with achievable small tasks. When you achieve them it feels really good. You need to be realistic with goals. The overall, longterm goal will come but set yourself small goals that are achievable in the meantime. xx

Lost_and_nervous

girlatplay wrote: »

Yes!!!! Put a plan into place with achievable small tasks. When you achieve them it feels really good. You need to be realistic with goals. The overall, longterm goal will come but set yourself small goals that are achievable in the meantime. xx

You are right and thats a very important post to remember. Thank you xxx

Lost_and_nervous

Im taking 5! Yes I am. Its been a busy morning. I have made £10! :j Need to check what else I have made on Ebay. Still not heard from them but am I going to... probably not... well I hope I do with the news which will help me out loads.

Have had to buy DD a couple of things but OH can give me the money for them as I dont have any spare money at the moment (when do I ever but he needs to start paying for more, I have woken up with the attitude of 'HE WILL DO MORE'

He moaned yesterday that all we seem to have is red meat especially mince - well its cheap and I can stretch it further. He said he is fed up of it so I said he will have to give me more for shopping then so I can get the finer variety of meat for him!

I have started a list of everything we have over the month, when its written down its actually quiet scary how much we spend. My aim is for OH to actually pay for more of the shopping and that way I can put more of my money to everything else. I am on a mission! He will be very shocked when he sees it, I will sit down with him and go through everything. Need to think of ways of reducing the actual buying further without him knowing that way I can put money away otherwise he controls it and expects miracles throughout the year! Oh I forgot my bank account is the tree down the end of the garden which instead of giving me interest monthly, all I have to do is walk down the end and pull it off! No minimal amount, it produces it continuously!

The old free bingo is a very slow process but anything is better than nothing and it will all help towards christmas (debt free christmas, debt free christmas, I am determined to have a debt free christmas!)

I went up in the loft again yesterday, I dont know why I do it to myself, its a scary place full of things. Must get into gear for everything in the house then I can start on everything in the loft.

I have joined that website free cycle and things I cant really sell will put on there and also I want to ask for plastic containers etc to see if I can organise things a bit better on no spend. you never know anyway.

Waiting for the snow to arrive! Will it arrive or not? It will cause chaos as always but I feel a bit in limbo this winter, its not really cold but its cold, oh I dont know what I am going on about at the moment. My head is jumbled with so much to do and what I want to do.

Well off I go again. xxx

Lost_and_nervous

I have changed my signature, instead of a Payment a day, I am doing a payment a month, think it will be more manageable for me as I am not sure as and when I can get on here, and plus it seems if I overload myself too much I have a meltdown. Lets hope this is better! xx

Eager_Elephant

Hi Lost

I was just about to reply to yesterdays post about your OH.

I did wonder if you got a second job whether he would expect you to pay for even more?

What did you tell him was the reason for the second job as you haven't told him about the debt?

It is a good idea that he should contribute more to the household as he earns more.

Have you written down all your outgoings as a household - you know like all the bills and the food and then work out what percentage each of you should cover depending on your income. So if he earnt 25% more than you a month then he would pay 75% of the household expenditure and you would only pay 25%.

I think you need to stop buying things which should be paid out of his account and when he moans he can give you more money like he has done with the food.

Hope things improve for you this year:T

Lost_and_nervous

Eager_Elephant wrote: »

Hi Lost

I was just about to reply to yesterdays post about your OH.

I did wonder if you got a second job whether he would expect you to pay for even more?

What did you tell him was the reason for the second job as you haven't told him about the debt?

It is a good idea that he should contribute more to the household as he earns more.

Have you written down all your outgoings as a household - you know like all the bills and the food and then work out what percentage each of you should cover depending on your income. So if he earnt 25% more than you a month then he would pay 75% of the household expenditure and you would only pay 25%.

I think you need to stop buying things which should be paid out of his account and when he moans he can give you more money like he has done with the food.

Hope things improve for you this year:T

Hello,

I have stressed to him (now on a number of occasions over the last couple of days) I NEED MONEY FOR MYSELF! He isnt happy about it but I have told him I am miserable and fed up of never having my own money. I even said, your not going to cough up so I need to do what I need to do. We all know on here the reason but as far as he is concerned I need more money for myself.

Trying to get him to contribute more is going to be a long struggle as he thinks it should be equal, but I am working on it, my list just of food is a joke, incorporating his fussy ways. I am thinking of ways to reduce it further, I have done a basic list, which I need to price check against all supermarkets, find the cheapest but not let on to him, he will get what he wants but hes paying for it!!

In an ideal way thats how it would be split but hes difficult and I am having to work on him.

Thank you, me too! I am determined for things to change and improve!

Hope your ok, its lovely to see you. xxx

ebayqueen_2

you sound alot stronger lost

Do what you have to do to sort our life out.

take care

Lost_and_nervous

Ebay have increased my selling limits! I can sell again! I am so happy and so determined. Its really given me a boost. Obviously I will start off with all the 99p listings and wait for free listing weekend, I feel there is hope for me yet.

Not such good news, the £10 I made the other day, I have £5.87 left after at work we 'had' to go for a lunch. So angry about it. That really didnt make me very happy. But hey its over and done with nothing that would have been done!

The weather is miserable again, but its going to be happy on the inside! xxx

Lost_and_nervous

ebayqueen wrote: »

you sound alot stronger lost

Do what you have to do to sort our life out.

take care

Thank you, and thank you for inspiring me. I am always going to have my down days as we all do, but I must take steps forward even if its just a couple back.

Hope you are ok xx