I need to leave so what’s stopping me? (very long sorry)

nomuny

I've already got my own account, have tried women's aid to no avail, and doc won't give me anti deppressants or offer any help but I'm not giving up and thanx for thoughts - trouble is at the moment I feel so lonely I have no one to turn to and I oh i just wish i coulkd go away and think wiyhout th other pressure of life.

life_in_termoil

NOMUNY
If the only reason you are staying is because your skint and cant get the money together for a deposit on a house then most councils have deposit schemes. Contact a local lettings agency or your local council and see what they can offer you. After that there is always housing benefit, income support or job seekers allowance, childrens tax credits and working tax credits.
Im sending you vast amounts of courage and some virtual hugs.

nomuny

Thanks life in termoil,

I do have my name on housing list but have been told it could be years before I get anything. Ideally he'd go but thats not gonna happen - have looked in local paper but deposit thing has held me back -will look into if there's any help with this thanx for tipoff. Another issue is I'm not willing to leave my dog (at th moment -feel like shes only friend I've got)and some LL don't want pets.

pigpen

Local councils don't usualy want deposits and even as a stop gap option it means you could save for somewhere else.. I think ours have a years tenancy agreement then it is a rolling tenancy.. I found pestering the same person daily worked well.. give them a ring and update circumstances.. need to leave breakdown of relationship .. slots you straight at the top of the lists here etc.. or contact a refuge for support and they might be able to help.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

nomuny wrote: »

Thanks life in termoil,

I do have my name on housing list but have been told it could be years before I get anything. Ideally he'd go but thats not gonna happen - have looked in local paper but deposit thing has held me back -will look into if there's any help with this thanx for tipoff. Another issue is I'm not willing to leave my dog (at th moment -feel like shes only friend I've got)and some LL don't want pets.

If you're at risk of domestic abuse, then you are effectively homeless. Many councils help with a private deposit scheme.
Dogs can be foster cared for this very reason.
And there are plenty of landlords who will accept well behaved pets.

Don't let false barriers get in the way of your escape. Keep pressing on and you will get out.

nomuny

.. give them a ring and update circumstances.. need to leave breakdown of relationship .. slots you straight at the top of the lists here etc

They already know why doesn't make any difference - you are given bidding points and up to yet am never the winner cos aven't enough points! just feel I need to point out hes not violent just name calling, etc and blows his top for what I think is no good reason. I'm gonna look at private rent if I can get help with deposit. I'l let you know how it goes can't carry on like this too much going on in all ares of my life none of it good.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

nomuny wrote: »

.. give them a ring and update circumstances.. need to leave breakdown of relationship .. slots you straight at the top of the lists here etc

They already know why doesn't make any difference - you are given bidding points and up to yet am never the winner cos aven't enough points! just feel I need to point out hes not violent just name calling, etc and blows his top for what I think is no good reason. I'm gonna look at private rent if I can get help with deposit. I'l let you know how it goes can't carry on like this too much going on in all ares of my life none of it good.

Is that intended to sound aggressive/sarcastic? If you are responding to genuine attempts at making helpful suggestions with sarcasm or hostility, I think it shows that he is damaging you more than you realise. If I've misread it, then I'm sorry and I apologise.

The homelessness register is separate to the general housing list. Whatever they tell you at the council. I suggest you contact Shelter for help with that side of things. They can give extra advice on deposit schemes as well.

nomuny

Originally Posted by nomuny
.. give them a ring and update circumstances.. need to leave breakdown of relationship .. slots you straight at the top of the lists here etc

They already know why doesn't make any difference - you are given bidding points and up to yet am never the winner cos aven't enough points! just feel I need to point out hes not violent just name calling, etc and blows his top for what I think is no good reason. I'm gonna look at private rent if I can get help with deposit. I'l let you know how it goes can't carry on like this too much going on in all ares of my life none of it good.

Is that intended to sound aggressive/sarcastic? If you are responding to genuine attempts at making helpful suggestions with sarcasm or hostility, I think it shows that he is damaging you more than you realise. If I've misread it, then I'm sorry and I apologise.

The homelessness register is separate to the general housing list. Whatever they tell you at the council. I suggest you contact Shelter for help with that side of things. They can give extra advice on deposit schemes as well.




sorry

no intention to be any of those things just know that its not that easy because I ve been for advice from several places and in my area if you leave you've made yourself intentionally homeless and this doesn't count in your favour - know of one lady thatwas being hit by her hubby but it was still several months before she was given anywhere and unfortunately the housing availability situation is much worse now. I've been told to stay and keep bidding, they just don't seem to understand -they were told not to phone me at home regarding my housing application and yet have still done this. Thanks I will contact Shelter and see what they say. once again sorry for any offense caused.

jinky67

once again Womens Aid may be of more help, as they know all the ins and outs of the local housing regulations

ladymarmalade1970

MadameCholet so glad you did it :-) Massive congratulations, well done you. I guarantee you won't look back. In a years time you will be wondering why you didn't do it years ago and your children will now respect you more and know they don't have to put up with crap no matter what!
Wish you all the best and remember, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. xx