spending and emotional issues

Byatt

I'm feeling defeated right now. The high of the past week; the feeling of at last taking control has plummeted. I know I can't, overnight, make everything alright, and until I am on a more level footing with my finances, it's going to be a roller coaster. But the simple fact of one DD going unpaid (I thought I had calculated exactly what I had available, but missed this one) and the bank charging me yet another £8 has emphasised the chaos of my life... has been and still is. I saved £6 on my shopping and end up paying £8 in bank charges! :(

What with an abusive ex stalking me (and he left me!!), my daughter who is autistic (she lives on her own, but I support her several times a week, involving travelling), and no hope of a job (combination of age/where I live/poor health), and ebay just barely bringing anything in, I feel like I'm hitting my head against a brick wall. Also just found out that the HB I get will be reduced because of the new govt regulations, and I live in a run down 1 bedroomed cottage and can't get anything cheaper.

Sorry, just feel so down tonight.

I need chocolate...:EasterBun

stubruscooby

in the darkest of nights. when the blackness is so dark it feels thick and viscus. you can feel it wrap its cold dark hand around your neck and slowly drain the life from you and you see it affect those around you

sometimes all you need is laughter http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ENo7seJScgU click this lick and watch the darkness fade away for those few seconds...it might only be a few seconds but its long enough to let you see the faces of those you love and support you..to let you see that there still with you..dressed for battle and ready to fight with you no matter how hard it gets

in a world this big your never alone...theres always someone do pull you up when your down

all you need to do is smile

Byatt

I LOL, thank you!

katebl

Hi Byatt, didn't want to read and run, just to say keep your chin up cause it can be a struggle, and you have our support! Look at how many of us you've inspired so far, I for one am grateful for your thread x

bratz81

Byatt, keep your chin up. Rome wasn't built in a day, and ok you got a bank charge, but I bet that's less than what you normally get charged so it is an improvement. Baby steps and all that.
Every month/week (depending on how your money comes in) you can make a little improvement and slowly but surely things will start falling into place.

skyvicky123

Hi Byatt, I really feel for you. You're having a tough time at the minute and I don't have any miracle solutions for you. I do like the post with the laughter solution. Sometimes you just need to find that chink of light and hold onto it.

I hope you know that we are all here for you to talk whenever you need us xx

BTW I really like the "5 OS pleasures" thread. It might help you find the little joys in every day to keep your chin up.

I really hope things improve for you soon xx

Byatt

Oh wow, I hadn't realised there were posts I hadn't replied to; so sorry.

time4help, I agree, there are lots of ways to emotionally spend. Thank you for sharing. I am sorry about the loss of your father and in such a way which must have been heartbreaking for you. But I am glad you have decided "enough's enough". I wish you the best.

ColleenPamela, I overeat too. Currently trying to change that as well! I come here every day, as it is very motivating, and I feel like I have a whole crowd of people cheering me on and understanding how hard it is at the same time.

Little bit dizzy, I am feeling somewhat better, thank you.

ali-t, that's really interesting; I've never thought of it like that.

katebl, yes, I agree, it's been good reading everyone's experiences and I'm so grateful for all that people have shared.

skyvicky123, your post was such a comfort, because I do have OCD (mildish), and have been doing the exact same thing!! I went to 3 supermarkets on Saturday to try and get the best deals! Then I'm on the OS MS forum looking at recipes!! I also understand the urge to spend, which is only relieved when I DO spend, but that of course is something I must work on. I have tried buying small things, but then I end up buying "small things" from several stores! I just added up what I spent this last month...:eek:

I'll be back, just going to have dinner!

Byatt

ceejaydee23, thank you for sharing How is the bedroom going?

skyvicky123, well done on the ebay sales. That has motivated me to try for when my car is due its service. And well done on only spending £4!

katsu, thanks for the recommendation; I will check my local library.

Byatt

katebl, thanks for the lovely post. I am feeling better, although evenings seem to be the worst time for me. I'll be glad when it gets lighter.

bratz81, true about the bank charge. I found out I have a "free" month in March and don't have to pay council tax. Normally I would be thinking what can I spend that on! But this time I am using it to pay towards my debt.

I think I've replied to everyone; I so appreciate all your support and kindness. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.:A:A:A

ceejaydee23

Byatt, Thanks for asking, Her room took just over 3 1/2 hours in all! 2 hrs 1 day, 1 1/2 hours the next and the last major bit was done today. So tomorrow will be the last touches! NEVER AGAIN! I will be putting up a daily checklist for her, and each morning/evening I will be making sure those jobs are done! The amount of so called socks id found that she couldnt was unreal! why the hell she thought she would need 3 empty pampers boxes and 2 3ltr empty juice bottles in her room was beyond me!