spending and emotional issues

skyvicky123

Ha it's like a parallel universe! My DD (2.5) has put something down the downstairs loo :mad:(suspect tampons in the wrappe:eek:r) Now despite plunging, chemicals, my hand down there etc it won't clear properly. Think the only solution is to take the toilet off now!

ceejaydee23

SkyVicky My DD is 9 nearly 10 and my DS is 14 months old! to bleedin clever for his own good lol

MessyMare

Thank you SkyVicky

Feeling a bit low today....the only way to stop myself spendspendspending right now is to stay in...does anyone ever worry that they're going to become a bit of a recluse

Byatt

Hi Colleen, sorry you are low; I'm feeling a bit the same, and have comfort ate for 2 days! I'm still up and wondering what to eat next!! I'm trying to pratice my CBT but it's difficult.

Yep, I have to stay in so I won't spend. Right now it's really cold in my cottage (stone and over 200 years old), so I kind of stay in one room. I can't function when I'm cold. And I get really dopey...

I find I feel really low in the evening/night time and start brooding. I haven't really found a solution to this, although I have learned not to make decisions but wait until morning.

Do you have any interests/hobbies? I don't really. I read and so on, but until it gets warmer and lighter there's not much I can do in the evening. It's pitch black round here, very rural, so can't even walk my dog, who is on loan to my daughter right now.

xxx

bratz81

Hi all. Lots to catch up on for me. I wasn't on for a few days as I was in London for a friend's birthday. It was budgeted for, and I was really pleased with myself for taking out my spending money for the trip from the ATM in the airport, and not spending a penny more. In fact, I even came home with a £10!
The old me would have spent and spent, then spent more and cried at the end of the month when the bills couldn't be paid. So I think I'm definitely learning, although it's taking time!

Agree with you guys about staying in to avoid spending money. I used to love wandering around the shops on a Saturday, but would end up buying something I don't want/need/can't afford so now I just don't go.

ceejaydee23

Byatt i've missed out on a social life for ages now! Until i went out with my folks when we took the trip to the isle of wight at the weekend, we had a fantastic weekend, i spent out on 1 round of drinks in a pub, 50p on a game of pool between my dad n other half, and a drink cuppa, n coffee for me n my mum, we had budgeted to take my mum n dad out for a meal as it was their wedding anniversary but my mum wouldnt have any of it, so we sent them some thank you/happy anniversary flowers instead. We had such a simple day out having a stroll along the beach, maybe spending a few quid on the silly 2p machines, But it was so enjoyable.

But staying in doesnt have to be boring, especially if you have a friend or 2 you can invite over! cook up something cheap n cheerful, or even ask them to bring a plate lol, (saw it on an episode of escape down under) all the guests bought a plate of food and they just kinda mixed n matched, seemed quite fun lol

skyvicky123

Hi all, I do agree Byatt this time of year is particularly depressing as there is little you can do with no money. I find my mood really suffers. Of an evening I have a snuggle on the sofa with a cuppa and a good book, I tell myself that's a treat, or a hot bath (I know that's not poss for all with heating costs etc)

It's easy once you are in a bit of a low mood to sit in and feel down, it's so hard to get up and do anything but if I push myself to get out of an eve with the dog and torch I always feel better when I get back.

Once the summer is here it's so much easier cos you can take yourself off with a pack-up to explore the countryside which always make me feel more joyful to feel the sun on me etc...roll on summer.

I do still enjoy a pootle around the charity shops (looks at me pootling I sound so old but I am only 27!)

Am out for budgeted chinese buffet tonight, but been asked out again nxt weekend. Have decided to drive and not drink to save cash.

MessyMare

It's nice to know someone is feeling the same Byatt (not nice that you feel low, argh, comforting would probably be a better word)...I do have hobbies, I make jewellery and I have my pet (domestic!) rats to play with...I'm also very ill at the moment with some horrid bug, as is boyfriend so we've been bouncing off the walls when here together, the only time I get out is when I have to go to work (no paid sick leave ) I just can't get myself motivated to do anything right now except watch my bank account like a hawk. I did push the boat out a little and contact one of our friends who does phenomenal tattoos...

I'm going to get a cricket ball....which sounds crazy but my boyfriend's last name is the same, with an extra t. He's played such a huge part in getting me back on my feet after an abusive relationship that I really want to do it, and hopefully one day I'll be Mrs C... but if not, if anyone asks I can just start singing 'I don't like cricket, oh no, I love it!'..

Off topic a little! I hope the sun is shining for everyone today and we all feel a bit better

Byatt

Hi everyone, how are you this cold March night! I am at my daughter's so keeping warm for a change. For some reason as I get older, I find I feel the cold more, not helped living in a cold damp cottage!! At least my daughter has central heating. It's been a difficult 2-3 days emotionally and I have eaten and eaten...too much cake (my downfall)...got a reduced panetonne from AF and I started on it last night. Big mistake! I know why I'm doing it; trying to fill the void, but still find it impossible to stop. Haven't come to any conclusion about that yet.

Anyway, on the plus side my spending diary is absolutely fantastic! I'm amazed I'm keeping it up because I'm not great at keeping written records, but it's a scrappy thing and I do write all sorts in it and carry it everywhere. I am getting a real buzz from putting things down and today it balanced with my online banking account!!! I know exactly what I have in my bank account. How good is that?! :T

I had a couple of dodgy moments with online shopping, but after I put stuff in the basket, I looked at it and thought, what am I doing?! And deleted everything. This morning I was surprised at how good I felt about that. Taking control instead of lurching along on the roller coaster with no brakes!

I spend a lot of time on the money off coupons forum and I am frustrated with myself for being so wasteful for years!

Really chuffed that £50 went out of my bank today to pay towards CC, as that would have been spent last month without a backward glance. Minimum payment is £17, but as you can guess, that hardly dents it.

I have enough money from eBay to get a birthday present for my very best friend, and then will start saving again for my car MOT in August. That was worrying me to death, but I feel much more in control about it.

Basically I have faced up to a lot of things, but the best thing is the spending diary!

I have had 1 NSD this month, working towards 10.

Vicky, my fish and chip shop has a sign which says fish and chips have less fat than burgers or KFC...plus fish is good for the brain! I think you have to have a treat now and then. :j

Byatt

CJ and Vicky, have you sorted out the loos??? :eek:

Bratz, well done on the London trip and keeping to budget!:T I love London, but haven't been for about 2 years. Tried to get the deal on a travel lodge but it wouldn't work!

CJ your holiday sounds fun. I agree about inviting friends. I suffer from depression, and my home is a mess right now, and I keep trying to tidy, but it's small and somehow it stays a mess, so I won't ask anyone around. Yet. I do spend a lot of time on my own. And can get very reclusive. My daughter needs a lot of support even though she has her own place so I spend time travelling to her and sorting things out etc (she is autistic). I get pretty tired, but we are trying to get out more. We are going on a Sun holiday, next month which isn't as cheap as the Sun imply, but my dd pays her half. (I did it before my LBM). We are taking our dog and will take all food, and it's just a break for a while. Not done anything in for ever. And it's not far to drive as it's in the same county as I live. LOL:rotfl:

Colleen how are you today. The bug sounds awful plus having to go to work with it! I love rats...I have a friend who keeps rats too. My ex was abusive also...I still haven't recovered, but we were together 30 years. It was slow and insidious psychological and emotional abuse and I didn't realise until he left. I'm glad you have found someone who is good. I don't expect to find anyone, as I can't trust anymore. I'm not sad about that. I just feel safer with just me. Did you get the cricket ball?

Well, that's me and my update! I can't use one word when 10 will do!!! :rotfl::rotfl:

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