Less than 12 weeks pregnant club! 2

mishkanorman

Finally I have my scan date :j:j:j:j:j The consultants assistant just called and said next thursday at 10am so a nice early one so I wont have the day getting stressed.

I thought I would be able to relax once I had a date to work towards, but I'm actually so nervous now I could puke NEVER happy :rotfl:

T-sil

hope you got on ok

Candycane_2

Hope all went well t-sil

I spoke to soon about the hospital being helpful about rearranging, they rebooked for literally the only hour OH can't do all of next week, and more importantly when I will not quite be 11 weeks. I am now trying to research private places and how I can combine the NT test but maybe have bloods with the NHS as it nearly doubles the price to have the blood taken as well. This is coming from someone who wasn't even sure about having the nuchal test to begin with, suddenly it seems essential.

There have been tears! I keep thinking it is my own fault, but the holiday I'm going on was booked last July and I expected to be much further on. Sure once I get something sorted I will be fine.

Hope everyone else is doing well

sexymouse

You don't necessarily have to have a blood test Candycane - I had the usual bloods taken with the midwife too, but I'm having the combined test to check for spina bifida, as Moon had a sister who died a couple of days after birth due to this.

Candycane_2

Thanks SM, yes I can see you can have the scan alone, but as the combined is what the NHS in my area recommend I am a bit nervous about going "off plan" if you see what I mean. I haven't been able to get a straight answer if they can use the blood they took last week or do some after 14 weeks - the hospital said doesn't matter what date the blood is taken, the midwife said it did!

Think I will go for the scan only - £100 and can have it in the evening or weekend. I buy extra days holiday from work that cost more than that so actually may work out cheaper in the long run - I will be a nervous wreak so was planning to have the whole day off as holiday.

Thanks (as ever) for the support. BTW did your dates get put back at your early scan, I am sure I remember you getting BFP well before me, but now we seem to be about the same

sexymouse

Yes I thought I was 6 + 4 when I had my scan, but they put me down as 6 weeks exactly. Will be interesting to see if they move me back up again when I have the dating scan.

moneypuddle

Isn't exciting now everyone either getting or getting close to getting their scan dates I'm so excited for us all.

There's only one thing blighting my happiness at the minute and thats my supposed best friend. I told her when I was 5 weeks and the got no congratulations. The only thing she said was 'you're telling people early'. Well to that I replied "No, you're my best friend. I'm only telling you and family", thinking she'd feel special and important, but no. We've now not seen each other since (a month!) when we only live about 3 streets from each other. She's been my friend since we were 11, and my best friend since we were 20 and I feel so hurt by her behaviour.

We work in offices and always have emailed other daily (10-20 a day sometimes if we're in a chatty mood) but she just can't be any more short with me at the minute. Examples of our conversation on email are:

Me: I just got my scan date x
Her: When is it
Me: 28th March! Can't wait x
Her: Yeah 28 is a nice number
Me: Can't believe its come round so quickly! x
Her: Well it hasn't. Its still 3 weeks away

Or my real favourite, a few weeks before. How thoughtless!
Me: We're deciding whether to have the Down Syndrome test
Her: Don't be so silly - you don't have to think about that for ages
Me: I have to know by my appointment with the midwife so it can be booked in
Her: Ok anyway, when are you going to email the rest of the hens about my hen party?

Or another:
Her: How come you weren't at work yesterday
Me: Morning sickness was terrible
Her: Oh right
Me: At least its a bit better today. I'm just starting to feel chunkier
Her: Dont be ridiculous. You can't be putting on weight yet. Its only a few weeks old, and is just a little ball of nothing at the minute. I saw Sarah (another friend) at 4 months and she was flat as a pancake
Me: Well I guess everyone is different

It just feels like no matter what I say, I am almost laughed at and put down and told not to be silly. Its so hurtful. She's the same age as me, has no children, but has plans to have them after getting married this summer. I know people have said before that maybe she's jealous and I'm sure it is that, but I don't see why I should have to feel guilty about being happy about my pregnancy.

I am trying to be sensitive, but the truth is that if I didn't acknowledge I was pregnant, neither would she and I want her to share in it with me. I know from what I've put above it sounds like I mention it a lot to her but I really don't (it makes up about 5% of our conversation) as I'm sick of being made to feel bad about it all. I just dont know what to talk to her about anymore.

We're meeting this weekend with another friend, who doesn't know Im pregnant yet, but who I want to tell, but I just feel like I can't say it out loud in front of my other friend because I can practically imagine the eye-rolling now.

So annoying and hurtful!

sexymouse

Hugs moneypuddle - sorry to hear your friend is being so unsupportive and unenthusiastic. I found out who my true friends were when I got married, and no-one offered to help me organise my hen-do. My supposed bridesmaid ended up pulling out after I'd bought the dress for her etc, and hasn't really been in contact since. I know that sounds harsh, as we got married in Jamaica, but she'd put down her deposit for her hotel etc, and is rather well-off in comparison to me, and she had offered to come with us, rather than me putting pressure on her to come. She ended up not even turning up to my hen-do in the end, but came to the reception back home as it was free food. Oh, and I had to organise my own hen-do in the end.

moneypuddle

Thanks sexymouse. I dont think friends can realise quite how awful they can be sometimes. You friend sounds just as bad! For my friend, I have organised her hen do and all I've felt at every point is criticised. Well, they do say that you find out who your true friends are at the biggest events in your life and I guess having babies and getting married falls into that category! I just feel that I'm going to feel very bitter about how she's treated me for a long time, and when she announces she's pregnant, I'll feel like I want to treat her the same as she's treated me, but I know I won't cos I'm not that kind of person. I mean seriously would it kill her to send me a text asking how I'm feeling?! Just once?! And not too be told that 5 weeks is too early for morning sickness and not to be so ridiculous, from someone who has not even been pregnant! Pfft I give up

Candycane_2

sorry to hear about your friend moneypuddle. I wouldn't stop telling the other friend, hopefully she can set the good example of how to behave.

She does sound like she is being a cowbag, but I would add that I never know what to say/ask people who tell me they are pg. I am a worrier that people will think its tmi or prying so I say nothing - although in relation to lots of things not just babies so hopefully people just realise I'm weird . Also, you were clearly in a conversation and she was putting you down, is she like this normally?

T-Sil

Hi Girls

Everything was perfect! PHEW! Measuring right on at 8+3, and a good strong heartbeat. She let me hear it too, it was amazing. I can start to see the arms and legs forming, eeek! I was convinced it was going to be bad news.

Thanks for all the support

I'm going to read back and comment on what you have all been chatting about now!

xx