How would you feel

rozmister

You sound like a wonderful step sister and family member to have with your patience and kindness about the whole episode.

I wouldn't bow out gracefully to appease your step-mother, don't even contemplate it. Regardless of what did or did not happen for you to find yourself potentially not invited this day is about your step-sister and if she says she would like you to come then go and enjoy her special moment as the friend and sister you are.

On a slight tangent I have heard of invites going out 6 months before, that was for my cousin's wedding which is this weekend. They ommitted another cousin off the list who is an integral part of my extended family (but not me a mere hanger on to proceedings ) and 2 of her 3 daughters refused to go because of it. Her 3rd daughter and I are still going together because I really want to see my cousin get married and my aunt would be upset if I didn't go and it would be seen as a personal slight on my part which would in turn upset me that I'd upset my aunt and cousin and family.

It seems the guest list causes quite a lot of wedding drama! I'm dreading mine if I ever get married because my dad's side of the family is huge and it's knowing where to stop with the invites and my Mum's side all live abroad. I also have two half brothers and a step brother I don't speak to but that I'd feel obliged to invite. I really feel for brides and grooms making up their guest lists with big extended families and step parents/siblings to consider!

peachyprice

You don't suppose your step sister said to her mum she wasn't going to send you an invite, which is a completely different thing to not inviting you.

If she's not ordered enough invites to go around she knows you won't need one because you know everything about the wedding. She might be keeping some spares back for the 'B' list once the acceptance/refusals arrive. That would also tie in with the cost comment, if she didn't have enough invites printed it would cost to have more done. Could be that your dad and step mum have got hold of the wrong end of the stick completely.

And no, I don't think it's unsual to send out invites so far in advance either, infact more the norm, especially if the wedding is in the summer. Imagine leaving it to 6 weeks before only to find half of the people you have invited have booked holidays already.

People need more than 6 weeks notice to buy outfits and presents, I'd be really miffed if I'd only got 6 weeks to kit everyone out, buy a pressie, book accomodation ect. it would throw my budget completely out of the window and I would think I'd been invited as an afterthought.

pupsicola

Alot of people going to the wedding are travelling in from abroad. Even those based in the UK are having to travel long distances, so hotel accomodation is necessary. I think this is why the invites are going out so early.

On top of all that most of us travel frequently and as someone mentioned in an earlier post I think they were worried about inviting people and being turned down due to other plans being made. People lead such busy lives that its a valid concern.

Ive already seen a gorgeous dress Id love to wear to the wedding. Am going to wait till much nearer the time to get it though. Mainly to see if I can drop a dress size, not now wondering whether I am going or not