Toddler Toilet Training help! (merged)

Ticklemouse

My DS1 was easy - just over 2, dry day and night in 2 weeks and only ever had 1 accident.

However ..... DS2 was another matter completely :eek:

Started trying when he was 2.5, 3, 3.5 but it was obvious he just didn't care and yes, i did get stressed about it. He's a tall lad and so looked older than his age and I used to get upset that at pre-school or round town, there was this big lad (looked 4 or 5) with a nappy poking out of the top of his jeans.

By the time he was 4, I was really fed up with it so decided we'd have to go "cold turkey". Just took his nappy off him and let him wet himself, although TBH he didn't really care. That took about 2 weeks before he started to get the message and tried to get to the loo to wee. I had taken him to choose new underpants and one of those padded kids loos seats and everything.

Weeing was under control, but he still needed a nappy to poo. He started school and STILL I had to put a poo nappy on him at bedtime - he would disappear into his room, close the door, fill the nappy and then ask for it to be taken off!! If I left it off him, he just wouldn't poo. The one day, whilst rushing around in the morning getting everybody ready for school, he just appeared and said he'd been for a poo in the toilet. Never had a problem since. In fact, he laughs when I remind him he still needed a poo nappy till he was 4 1/2!! (Bless, he's only 5 1/2 now :rotfl:) Oh, and he NEVER used a potty - wouldn't even sit on it. Guess he didn't find it comfy.

So, don't stress (easier said than done) but they WILL do it when they are ready. My consolation was that when other mums were saying how well their little angels were doing, my boy was happily sitting in his nappy, reading, and now they are all toilet trained, but my son's reading age is years ahead of his classmates :rotfl:

Carmina_Piranha_3

:rotfl: yes, it's silly of me but i do sometimes think 'well mine can do such and such and yours can't'.

my boy is massive too, and well built. he doesn't have long though before the largest size 6 nappy i can find won't fit (pampers baby dry - anyone found anything bigger for kids with wide hips? he's not fat, he's built like a rugby player so i doubt he'll slim down any).

he goes to a playgroup for a 2 hour session and i think that might be where he decides to sit on a potty, because the other children do it. if he's having his nappy changed he will see others using a potty or toilet in the same room. most of the children there are already 3 and he's one of the last ones still in nappies.

Ticklemouse

If he's big, he may have to sit striaght on the toilet and not use the potty. I think that's why my DS2 didn't use the potty - he is built like a prop forward too No fat, just big bones, wide hips like your son.

My DS1 is built like a racing snake so his little bum fitted nicely and obviously comfortably on the potty

As for nappies, I just used Tesco value ones at the end for "the poo" cos I knew they didn't have to stay on long. But they are noticeable smaller than branded makes. Can't help re bigger nappies, although they are out there because older children with medical needs use them. Maybe ask a health visitor?

Carmina_Piranha_3

i'll ask, but i suspect that she'll advise me about star charts

i asked a woman across the road whose older buy has medical reasons for wearing nappies, but he's in ordinary nappies because he's slim.

i'm only feeling a bit pressured because of him being a summer birthday and going to nursery in september. i'll ask the nursery what their policy is - maybe they will change him. when my eldest was 3 the nursery didn't take them until they were 40 months old and you had the option of waiting an extra term because they did 3 intakes, but now it's 36 months onwards with one intake a year.

heather38

the huggies dry night go up to age 15 i think, so they might be your next stop

HappySad

Can you help me please!!!!

My 4 1/2 year old son still poos himself. I have spoken to him, given time out and explained that big boys do not poo themselves. But nothing has worked.

I don't know what to do.

He is completely dry and clean during the night and will wake up if he needs the toilet. During the day we have to remind him to use the toilet and he will only agree to use the toilet at the last minute. He has no problem weeing and pooing on the toilet. It is just that he would rather do anything else.

I have been potty training him for over 1 1/2 years now.

Would love advice from other parents who have children who are late in developing this ability.

aligerdie

hmm, have you tried turning it into a game?
Perhaps for every day he can keep clean, you could give him a reward, something which he really likes.

I gave dd loads of praise when she did her stuff on the toilet and she used to be so proud of herself!

Some kids get the hang of it at different times, but i think rather than scold him, you should praise him up when he does do it right.

Maybe instead of reminding him to go to the toilet you could set up a little sticker chart on the wall. Everytime he goes to the toilet, he then gets to put a stciker on the picture.

Just a thought anyway, my daughter is the total opposite, whenever we go anywhere she has to go to the toilet as soon as we get there. She likes sitting on the seat and looking around, she's so nosey!!:rotfl:

dawnybabes

My LO was still pooing in his pants at 4.5 - we had to blackmail him with cars - every time he did it on the loo he got to pick a new car from the stash we had in the garage. It wasn't that he didn't want to use the loo - he just could not see the point in breaking off from play to go ! Eventually he got the hang of it but it took months .....Still occasionally have accidents now and he 5.5 !

I just went to Primark and stocked up on cheap knickers.

One thing we did (rightly or wrongly) if he pooed in the loo we wiped him clean if he pooed in his knickers I made him clean it cos he HATES the thought of poo on his hands

izoomzoom

Has he always poo'd in his pants, or was there a period of time where he never did it. I ask, because it may be a form of disgression - could he be unhappy about some kind of change that has occurred ?

I would definitely advocate the reward sticker thing - everytime he goes to the toilet he gets a sticker and if he goes by himself (without prompting) he could get two stickers or stamps or whatever ...

moo2moo

It could be its a developmental problem. Not a "problem" as such, just a delay. The obvious sign would be if hes surprised that its happened. The simplest way to explain it is that the signal between the muscle and the brain hasn't fully matured. Its very common. My eldest had it. The good news is they grow out of it. The bad news is it could take a few more years. No amount of bribery or reward will change this. It'll just make your son more aware of it, which isn't always a good thing, especially if his body isn't ready. Theres no miracle cure, it just takes time. Buy dark coloured underwear and carry a spare set with you where ever you go.

The other alternative is its uncontrollable as a result of a mild food intolerance. However this usually has a truly unbelievably bad smell asscociated with the underwear!