Please please please help! Pregnant & suicidal over debts, redundancy & illness

RAS

vicxzy wrote: »

I did the cccs budget planner & am minus £943 per month now which includes my debts, repayments on which total around £950 per month, so basically all my income goes on paying rent, mgt, council tax utility bills, ground rent, site management fees, fuel for getting to work is £5 per day as I work a good hour from where I live & parking (costs me 2.50 per day) I dont spend anything on myself apart from £25 every 6-8 wks for my hair
When I go on mat leave all we will be able to afford is the rent & council tax here by the skin of our teeth, Ex has said he will cover the mgt while Im on mat leave but only when im on stat pay x

You need to talk to CCCS then. In the short-term, going to them takes the pressure off you.

It may well be the creditors need to get £1 per month each, as you have nothing to pay them.

dancingfairy

o.k your options appear to include
a) keep paying the mortgage on the mortgaged property with a view to selling it and offer token payments to your unsecured creditors or
b) look into the possibility of not paying the mortgage, letting the house being repossessed (you need to concentrate on your new family right now) and going bankrupt.
There may be other possibilities as well but these are what spring to mind. I would have a chat through all the options with one of the debt charities.
df
P.S I've got to go now but I hope tonight is more restful for you.

Nargleblast

Vicxzy - well done for posting, and I hope you have gained some useful info and reassurance from people on here so far. Do not rush into anything like debt repayment schemes or IVAs until you have drawn up a clear statement of your financial situation as it stands now, plus a statement of what it is likely to be once you are on maternity leave. You then need to talk with one of the recommended organisations (eg Citizens Advice, CCCS, Payplan for example) and see what they advise. As far as your boss is concerned, she was on dodgy ground visiting you at home, and it is unlikely she would be able to use anything against you that was said at that meeting as it was not an official meeting in the workplace, and you did not have a representative with you, which is your right. Take union advice as and when things develop, March will soon be here and disciplinary proceedings tend to be long winded things at times, even if there are grounds for the disciplinary route. You still have a job and you have rights which cannot be pushed aside, so concentrate on your health and getting the financial issues sorted. There is a solution to every problem, you just have to find the right one, and if your current partner is worth anything then he will be right with you on all these issues.

oweido

hi so sorry to hear the trouble with work on top of your illness etc.. not sure if this has bene mentioned before, as only had a quick scan through posts. but ref your work, if you are not well enough, please do not go back.. you wil be entitled to claim Employment Support Allowance, or SSP, depending on your contract etc, that in turn wil entitle you to claim other benefits... at the moment it sounds like work is the last thing you should be worried about. if you want more info please P M me.
thinking of you...

yellowduck_2

Vicxzy I have quickly skipped through your thread and just wanted to say that two years ago I was in a really bad situation, bullied at work, seriously depressed, pysically ill, facing redundancy, owing money to Nat West (still owe them money) and feelling like there was no point in going on. Two years down the line I have a new job, the depression was sucessfully treated by my Gp and a great mental health nurse. Still have grief from Nat West but advice from this forum and my local law centre have helped me deal with them.Guess I just wanted to say that you will come through, things often change without us realising how far we have come. I send you a hug and my best wishes

wannaBrich

Hun I 'm new to boards, you sound so fed up

my money probs have got me down
(to extreme of attempted suicide several times) _pale_

I have never called but have emailed samaritans many times since.
they don't have the answers, but writing your feelings and thoughts out really help you gain perspective.

I changed my number and to my creditors gave them a PAYG number but said I couldnt answer it as I mentally couldnt take it anymore.

I see an advisor at CAB and looking into getting a debt relief order and currently paying £1 monthly token payments and ask that all corraspondance go to my CAB advisor.

help this helps you a bit, remember, you are never alone :grouphug:

haycorns

Hi vicxzy,

Sorry life is so tough - but you can get through this will a little help from your new MSE friends.

It sounds like your employer is a reasonable size one with some systems in place and it recognises unions. That's all good. I would recommend you contacting HR about your sick leave and explainig to them the problem you have with the equipment. If they are that bothered about it they will arrange to collect it.

Unfortunately HR can have all the policy and procedures in place but its down to managers to follow it. Yours clearly isn't . You can tell them discretely what is going on with the visit and threats and they can have a bit of a chat with your manager. The rate they are going this manager will end up causing a problem that could mean the company ends up being taken to court by you for all sorts of things but mainly discrimination.

You say you may be made redundant in March - have they put your job 'at risk' or are you on a fixed term contract? If you have been there a year even on a fixed term contract you have some rights.

You don't have to put up with how they are treating you. You really don't need this right now and it is probably making your health worse.

Do you have an occupational health service? This is someone who can chat to you and advise the manager whether or not you are fit to be at work ( clearly you aren't). They will also advise the manager to back off and would probably tell them not to visit either.

vicxzy

Thanks all, Im not sure about Occ health we have a welfare dept but I'd need to go back to work first...can anyone tell me what a debt relief order is please?x

beanielou

You dont need to go back to work to get in touch with your welfare department.
Take care,& please get in touch with ACAS for further advice & support.
Someone has already posted the link for you.

vicxzy

Sorry forgot to add I called ACAs today the guy I spoke to was really unhelpful basically said go back & ask your employer whether they will pay you maternity or not because its up to them! He said if they make me redundant before or during mat leave then I cant go back to work for the minimum 3 months after mat leave so its up to them whether they pay it or not! I spent 6 minutes waiting to get through too, the guy just sounded totally bored & uninterested x