"so why don't you want children?"

KiKi

DevilsAdvocate1 wrote: »

And then they ask if I wanted a girl because I have 3 boys.

Oh, that is so rude! I actually think that's more rude that asking someone why they don't want kids because it implies that you're not happy with the children you have.

I think I'd have to have some witty comeback ready for that one.

KiKi

Ryliesmummy

I've always planned to have children, but that doesn't mean I am opposed to those that don't, everyone is different, and if everyone decided to have children we would be massively over-populated. I find it disrespectful that some people who do not want children, criticise those that have them, I am a mother for example, but that doesn't stop me doing the things I want to do, If we want to go on holiday, we take our child, if we want to go out for the night, we have a babysitter, just because we have children doesn't mean our lives are restricted. I only have the one, and OH has decided for us that its enough if he changes him mind great, if he doesn't, then he doesn't. I think it is quite an intrusive question to ask, It's like going up to a man and asking how long his penis is!

shaven-monkey

Frugalista wrote: »

Here's a pretty good reason for not having children....

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1346357/World-faces-overpopulation-disaster-number-people-set-rise-75-million-EACH-YEAR.html

Not a very good reason, we live in the developed wealthy nations and have too many bombs to lose our advantages to any of the younger upstart countries in any stand up fight.

Allowing them to win on some sort of democratic basis seems terribly ... progressive. Much better to let them enjoy famines and pestilence to keep things under control.

My companion tells people that she's barren, that tends to stop them in their tracks. 1/4 of my genes will live on in my nieces and nephews, a lower proportion in my cousin's children but importantly I don't have to change any nappies, remember to collect them from school or sacrifice any of my waking free time to turning them into people I would want to spend any time with.

Frankie Boyle had an interesting take on childbirth and infidelity recently but this is a moderate board, so I'll leave you to find it and be offended as homework.

BubblyMumbles

People really just need to learn to be more respectful and less judegemental of people's choices, why is that so hard?

SandC

It tends to be people that you don't know very well who make an issue out of it. Just because I don't have kids doesn't mean my mates think I'm not interested in their holiday pics of theirs or anything like that. And as I said previously I do have to fake enthusiasm at pregnancy announcements but I make all the right noises and say congrats and all that. It's not much to do with whether or not you want or don't want children if you are just downright rude about someone's choices which happen to be different to your own.

CherryRea

From a parent-

I'm jealous of your carefree life. Coming and going as you please. Not being dragged out of bed at 6am because a certain someone needs some cocopops and a hit of Hannah Montana.
Babysitters are hard to come by. So is the dinner money that needs to be paid on a Monday but oh no I've spent my last £20 on a pair of new school shoes for madam. I hate the small talk the other parents at the school gates try to make with you. Sorry I'd love to stay and chat about the nasal fluids that are running down your little cherubs face but I need to get going to work. Need the pennies to buy the expensive school unifrom this school insists on us buying. Then there's the endless kids parties I have to [STRIKE]go to[/STRIKE] buy stupid presents for. Why am I buying a present for a kid I've never even met?? I don't even buy myself stuff but here I am buying a Disney Princess set for that little brat that threw sand in my DD's face last week :mad:
Of course children are great. By that I mean mine

Would I swap DD for a childfree life? Am I allowed to say yes but only if I could have DD back a few years down the line?
No of course not. Saying that makes me a baaaaaaaaaaad parent

Childfree by choice peeps I saulte you!

Fuzzy_Duck

bratz81 wrote: »

I am loving some of the comments on this thread to shoot back at people who keep asking me if I want kids!
I don't want kids, and never really have. When I was younger (about 19/20) I thought I would have some as it's the norm, then realised I didn't really want to.
Don't get me wrong, I've nothing against children, they can be fun and dead on, but I really don't want one of my own.

I also know that at 29 I might change my mind as I get older. And if I do fair enough. I can't see it but you never know. But I really hate people telling me I will change my mind, as if I don't know what I bloody well think!

I do also get the 'smug parent' thing. I seem to be surrounded by people who think they're better because they've managed to reproduce. Wow, well done, what do you want a medal?? And please don't get me started on those people who think cos they are walking about with a pram everyone has to jump out of their way and they've the right to run over your ankles!

Massive pet hate of my mine! Especially as prams tend to be so incredibly huge these days and some parents insist on walking side by side with their prams so they take up the whole pavement. One of my earliest memories is sobbing as a tot after a woman ran her pram over my feet (to this day I hope she simply didn't notice me, although the whole street could have heard my wailing!) , and a few years ago I was walking through town and got caught in a massive crowd of people. We weren't going anywhere and the moron behind me kept ramming his pram into my ankles, again and again and again.

My feelings are if you feel the need to use your child's pram as a battering ram/assault weapon, you shouldn't have had them. Horrible people.

SandC

Ryliesmummy wrote: »

I've always planned to have children, but that doesn't mean I am opposed to those that don't, everyone is different, and if everyone decided to have children we would be massively over-populated. I find it disrespectful that some people who do not want children, criticise those that have them, I am a mother for example, but that doesn't stop me doing the things I want to do, If we want to go on holiday, we take our child, if we want to go out for the night, we have a babysitter, just because we have children doesn't mean our lives are restricted. I only have the one, and OH has decided for us that its enough if he changes him mind great, if he doesn't, then he doesn't. I think it is quite an intrusive question to ask, It's like going up to a man and asking how long his penis is!

Don't suppose you can win either - I've heard it even from my friends that apparently having one child 'isn't fair'. I know my bro and sis in law who have one child by choice (my bro had the snip as soon as my nephew was born, pretty much) and many people feel the need to comment on how he 'needs' a brother or sister. And on and on.....

Dr.Rock

Done_and_Dusted wrote: »

What annoys me is when you have to work xmas because you don't have any children so the people "with" children can have it off. Like their xmas is more important than mine!!

I'd have thought there'd be little chance of that with children around.

pupsicola

CherryRea wrote: »

From a parent-

I'm jealous of your carefree life. Coming and going as you please. Not being dragged out of bed at 6am because a certain someone needs some cocopops and a hit of Hannah Montana.
Babysitters are hard to come by. So is the dinner money that needs to be paid on a Monday but oh no I've spent my last £20 on a pair of new school shoes for madam. I hate the small talk the other parents at the school gates try to make with you. Sorry I'd love to stay and chat about the nasal fluids that are running down your little cherubs face but I need to get going to work. Need the pennies to buy the expensive school unifrom this school insists on us buying. Then there's the endless kids parties I have to [STRIKE]go to[/STRIKE] buy stupid presents for. Why am I buying a present for a kid I've never even met?? I don't even buy myself stuff but here I am buying a Disney Princess set for that little brat that threw sand in my DD's face last week :mad:
Of course children are great. By that I mean mine

Would I swap DD for a childfree life? Am I allowed to say yes but only if I could have DD back a few years down the line?
No of course not. Saying that makes me a baaaaaaaaaaad parent

Childfree by choice peeps I saulte you!

I second all of this