Hubby hit me

sassyblue

JBD wrote: »

Peakma, Mummy29 has 4 children so I think this is another very sad case.
Hopefully Mummy 29 is safe with her children now. I also hope some others may have found support from the messages on this thread.

I agree with your sentiments. I hope mummy29 is safe and l wish she could update, if only to give her the confidence to seek help if she hasn't already left.

Googlewhacker

rozmister wrote: »

I don't think that article could be the OP (thank god) because the husband told everyone his wife had left him before Christmas and the OP posted at the beginning of January. The last sighting at present of the lady in that article is 11th December.

I really up the OP is ok, domestic abuse never gets better but it is terribly hard to leave men like that. One of my favourite quotes from a friend is "You don't get over it, you get through it" and I would say that's something a lot of survivors could relate to. After leaving you realise over time that it doesn't have to be like that all the time.

Best wishes mummy29 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Really never gets better? You can't rehabilitate then? I dn't quite believe that to be honest.

rozmister

Googlewhacker wrote: »

Really never gets better? You can't rehabilitate then? I dn't quite believe that to be honest.

I mean that when there's domestic abuse in a home the situation doesn't get better not a victim doesn't get better. And yes in some VERY rare cases rehabilitation can work but first you need a partner who recognises he has a problem and seeks long term professional help which is something you never really hear about happening. I'm sure it does but in every single case of domestic abuse I've heard of - through the news and anacedotally - it hasn't. And for things to get better you need a massive change in how things happen at home because if you continue as you are when domestic abuse occurs it simply continues.

nerak_y

Just read through some fantastically supportive messages for the OP, it is genuinely lovely to see a community come together like this. Also goes to show how common DV is as so many posters are speaking from personal experience.

My thoughts are with you very much and i do hope yourself and your children are safe

nerak_y xx

headcrash27

I really feel for you, i've been in that situation and i know how hard it is. It used to be the case that you were able to stay in any refuge in the country. It may be possible that they could put you in a refuge near your family. Also don't worry about uprooting the kids, my husband spent a long time in a refuge as a child and it was one of the happiest times in his childhood - his mum was happy and there were always lots of other children to play with. I really hope you can find the strength to leave him, i think that now he's hit you things will only get worse and it will get easier for him to do it again and again. Please think about your kids and try and find the strength to do it for them x

rozmister

headcrash27 I think that's still the case about being referred to any refuge in the country. My friend I went to school with moved to the same town as me randomly (250 miles from where we grew up in rural Cornwall) but when she had to go into a refuge last year because her bf was abusive she was referred back to one in Cornwall that was far enough away from where we grew up that she couldn't easily be found if they went looking. She could still get to her family and friends in under an hour though.

nygel

mummy29 wrote: »

Iam a regular user so have registered with a different name

I really dont no where to start,my husband hit me twice in the face this morning,causeing my mouth/nose to bleed
we moved to a new area last year,so i no nobody,have no friends and noone to turn too
Things are really bad
i feel like ending it all,just so i can get away

Hey there. You have a really bad situation. I think whatever argument you and your husband had he still does not have the right to hit you. I think you should report him to the authorities.

sassyblue

Googlewhacker wrote: »

Really never gets better? You can't rehabilitate then? I dn't quite believe that to be honest.

In a very few cases... the ones where circumstances have made them turn into something they'd rather not been, sort their lives out and they can change.

IMO the majority of bullies and abusers will be that all their lives because that is their personality.

Needhelpsaving

Don't end it all; just leave him you are worth more than being beaten and living in fear. How many abusers (Male & Female) say they won't do it again then do. Draw a line in the sand now.

Go to your parents etc - get out for yourself and your kids (if that applies).

jamespir

i think a lot of you are so quick to judge we dont know what led up to her being hit (not that im condoning domestic violence i myself have been a victim of domestic violence and its a horrible thing for people to go through ) we dont know if she hit him first we dont know if this is a one off


so how you can side with someonoe when you dont know the full story beats me