Bitter sister in law

Alittlesad

I'm looking for some advice please.:o

My husband and I delightedly announced at Christmas that I am pregnant with our third child.:j
Unfortunately my husband's sister has been unbelievable in her response.
She is a single (never married) woman in her fifties who has never had children and claims to find anyone with more than 2 children to be irresponsible.
She always said that she would have a problem with us having another child and has said now that she is very disappointed in us and won't be buying presents for this child as it is just adding to the overpopulation of this country.
I do feel a bit sad for her though as she does come across as very bitter that she is alone.
I have always found her odd to be honest but I am really shocked at this and don't know how to react.

Any help would be welcome.

themull1

I wouldnt have anything else to do with her.

PasturesNew

Why is her opinion/honesty "bitter"?

It's just her opinion, which differs from yours.

BitterAndTwisted

The best thing to do is not react at all. She's not normal as a normal person would be delighted for you, even if it was a choice they would not make for themselves. At least you know you won't need to invite her to the christening!

Plans_all_plans

Just tell her that you don't mind in the slightest that she wont be welcoming the child into the family: it's her problem, not yours. She is clearly very petty. Just look forward to your new arrival and be civil when you see your SIL. Don't let her opinion get to you. I feel sorry for her.

Alittlesad

themull1 wrote: »

I wouldnt have anything else to do with her.

That is my instinct but I know it would hurt my parents in law terribly. She is quite indulged by them as regards her behavoiur and it puts my husband in a very difficult position.
The baby is much wanted and will be provided for finacially by us (no benefits) and we have plently of room for it.
I can understand that she isn't maternal (or never had the chance to be) but I can't understand her not being happy for her brother or her parents who are delighted to be grandparents again.

lostinrates

Its quite possile she does hold those views...I do...but I also respect that not everyone agrees, and they are just my views. Anyway, I'd just let her get on with it and leave her to her own devices and get on with your own lives. What does your partner think?

geri1965_2

So she will buy presents for the other two but miss this one out? How petty, I would be inclined to tell her not to bother with presents for any, as you won't accept them.

whitewing

Congratulations anyway xxx

I would just ignore her bitter comment for now as a one off. If it's continual then just keep your distance. I certainly wouldn't pander to her by making an issue of it.

I wouldn't say anything but in the future if she did just buy for the two oldests, then I would return her presents making it clear that your children don't get treated differently. But you needn't raise this beforehand as a lot of what may happen often doesn't!

tanith

Just let her get on being sad and bitter and eccentric. To be honest I wouldn't accept presents for any of my children from her if she is going to choose to ignore your youngest.. silly woman , she is the one who will miss out on a relationship with her nieces and nephews... how does your husband feel about her?

nearlyrich

If she still buys for the first two but not for the third that's not very nice the child hasn't chosen to be born, if that's her plan I would decline any further contact for all of you. people sometimes say what they are thinking without realising how hurtful their comments can be maybe give her the chance to retract her statement and if she means it tell her to do one her loss.