Mooloo's New Home, New Year and New Start part 3

Savvy_sewing

My mr A. delivery has arrived and the fridge and freezer are now full. (freezer is very small one). The cupboards have been topped up with the basics that I was out of. Pasta, tinned beans, tomatoes, etc etc. So with the lovely bits and pieces from my Appr Food delivery we are raring to challenge February to a good menu plan and some more frugal life.

I am now off to do battle with the SW.
I better put some war paint on!

Savvy_sewing

Hello, its been a long and hard day. But I have finally got my Cheque, and I have put it in the post to the bank.
It should have been a BACS payement but at least I know I will get to Pay for my shed now!.
DGD went to Nursery for her 9 - 3, and I went to see the Team Manager in Northampton.
I had to give a bit of a synopsis of the way things were done, and the inadequacy's etc and at the end of an hour and 20minutes she had agreed to look things up, speak to other heads and to try and find some sort of way forward so that our treatment is much more professional. That our current SW is supervised better and that he is doing his job properly. That dispite all the restructuring, it is not acceptable to be treated this way.
I did finally feel as if someone was interested and also "fuming" on my behalf.
I would not go as far as to say that heads would Roll, but there is certainly going to be more discussions about our situation. She admitted that on getting the information, there is yet another person back on the job, and that she was/is caretaking the role, but that the new person started yesterday. My heart sank, but she did confirm that she was going to take action to makesure that this is sorted out.
Anyway the irony of it all was that the cheque was indeed in the post and was here on the door step when i got home after the meeting. I have telephoned and left a message to tell her the same.

She is also going to ask the team that care for DGS's as to why my visits have to be supervised. etc .
We may be too late to do anything now though, as court proceedings etc are on going. But she did agree that the other week when the father of DGS1 was not going to be there for his visit, that the room was booked as was the supervising worker, that we should have been able to stay a bit longer with the boys. It would have done no harm. Bit of madness.

So I am to expect a letter outlining what has happened, will happen and she hopes that they can make the rest of our dealings with SS a better experience, and compensate us some how for the past.

I told her that I had it all catalogued on the internet, and that I had thought I would go to the press on several occasions with it all being such an inadequate experience.

I just got to pick up twin1 and get DGD from Nursery on time. By the skin of my teeth. Then I remembered that i had to go all the way back to Towcester for DGD's dancing lessons! what a day.
Far too much driving for me. My arm is killing me, and for some reason the sciatica has decided that it is to go down my right side now!. so the pain is worse on the right legs, and the left arm! great.
But I feel triumphant that I was listened too, and that I do now have my funding sorted out.

Till the next time?

Thanks everyone for your wishes, support and giving me the energy to say my peice to them. I feel knackered but happy and elated that I have finally received what is due to me.

:T:T:T:T:T:T:T

peppa-pig

good news at last mooloo! lets hope this is the start of things on the up

xx

gizmo111

Good news at last - lets hope she carry's it through.
Unsupervised contact would be great and so much more natural for the boys if you have it at home.

Keeping_Motivated

gizmo111 wrote: »

Good news at last - lets hope she carry's it through.
Unsupervised contact would be great and so much more natural for the boys if you have it at home.

Forgive my ignorane as I am clueless on these situations but wouldn't this make it emotionally harder on the boys? I mean it is going backwards in terms of what the future holds for them and might be more confusing and build their hopes up?

This doesn't help Mooloo I accept and if I was her I would want to see them as much as possible obviously but my gut thought what if the boys think (especially the older one with more memory) that they are coming 'home' IYSWIM.

Like I said though, this is not an informed opinion just a gut reaction?

Errata

It sounds like a positive meeting. I know you often 'write things up' on your PC; do you think this would be a good point to write a letter to the manager along the lines of 'Today when we met we discussed and agreed ......' covering each and every point. Sent by snailmail.

Savvy_sewing

Errata wrote: »

It sounds like a positive meeting. I know you often 'write things up' on your PC; do you think this would be a good point to write a letter to the manager along the lines of 'Today when we met we discussed and agreed ......' covering each and every point. Sent by snailmail.

She is supposed to be doing just that, and letting me know who to contact in future, and i notice that it was very much sidestepping the current SW at the moment. He is to be "guided". Well I am not against him as a person, he is pleasant enough, but he doesnt really know what he is doing.

Right, onwards and upwards. lets hope that some of the hassles are over and done and our lives can become easier.

I can understand some views that having the boys here would be giving them hope, but also that also means that on the opposite they would find it very difficult to adjust to being back in the family as we would be strangers, if they are actually given the chance to be a family.

Twin2's BF asked her to marry him yesterday, and even produced a ring. He is working and he is serious. He has been good with DGd, and I really think that the SS should think about helping them to stay as a family, before they are sent off for adoption.? Is this unfair of me? I am not sure. I do believe in this lad, I do believe that with the right support they would be able to be a family.

One good thing I heard is that the SW that is dealing with the boys, and who was so ruthless in the beginning and will not bend, has finally "retired".
Yipee.
On that note I must ring twin2 and tell her!.

Errata

She is supposed to be doing just that, and letting me know who to contact in future

I hope her letter to you covers all the points, is completely accurate and is timely. Me, I'm a control freak when it comes to bureaucrats and like to get my retaliation in first

Keeping_Motivated

Mooloo wrote: »

I can understand some views that having the boys here would be giving them hope, but also that also means that on the opposite they would find it very difficult to adjust to being back in the family as we would be strangers, if they are actually given the chance to be a family.

Twin2's BF asked her to marry him yesterday, and even produced a ring. He is working and he is serious. He has been good with DGd, and I really think that the SS should think about helping them to stay as a family, before they are sent off for adoption.? Is this unfair of me? I am not sure. I do believe in this lad, I do believe that with the right support they would be able to be a family.

Sorry Mooloo I didn't realise there was still some hope of possible reunion, of course you are right if there is a chance of them coming home they should still keep them ties/bonds.

I will send positive thoughts that this is the way it goes, I really do hope so for yours and the boys sake.

Great news about the funding at last and I hope this woman finally shakes everyone up enough to do their jobs properly.

Savvy_sewing

Keeping_Motivated wrote: »

Sorry Mooloo I didn't realise there was still some hope of possible reunion, of course you are right if there is a chance of them coming home they should still keep them ties/bonds.

I will send positive thoughts that this is the way it goes, I really do hope so for yours and the boys sake.

Great news about the funding at last and I hope this woman finally shakes everyone up enough to do their jobs properly.

Until the final court case in May, we do not know the outcome for the boys.
If we can present to the courts that Mum is in a stable relationship, that the partner is willing to take on the boys, and that as a family we can also support them coming home and the boys are not going t be at risk. It is only fair that we still try. Children should be placed in the family. Mum made mistakes, god we all know that, but before it is too late, we should be able to try to salvege a family don't you think? Well I do. But I am biased. They are my family.
I would take the boys in myself, so often it has been a thought on my mind. But I also have to be realistic and as my health is bad I cannot realistically do it.
But I can support. and i fear that my supporting mum with kids is actually going to be easier then dealing with the system and the stressses that I have had to cope with.
My health has deteriorated considerably in the last 3 years. And I have been told many times that Stress agravates it. Shaz mum of 2, will tell you that one no doubt.
Twin 2 is practically on the verge of a nervous breakdown, but nobody will listen or help her. We are damded.
this is not fair.
It is like our country policy of "innocent until proven guilty" well with the press that is not so. And someone arrested is reported and plastered all over the place. Then ah! m, they are let go. we should not hear this. Only the facts. that is why our world is wrong.

Sorry.
got to get off of here, as my emotions are very high