MSE Pregnancy Club 20

SusanC_2

Sammy_Girl wrote: »

Both mummies and mummies to be - what are you plans for LO/s should anything happen to you and your OH? I've been giving this a lot of thought lately as DH and I haven't prepared any wills - we always thought we would wait for our first child to come along first. I'm thinking that I will probably ask my sister and her OH to have legal responsibility for baby should anything happen to us both - but obv I need to speak to her first! The child will have Godparents that are friends, but I think if anything were to happen, it's best for the child to stay within the family. I know its a bit of a morbid topic, but thoughts please

We don't have any family we think would be that suitable so we have local friends down in our will. We also have life insurance so that if one of us died there would be enough money to pay off the house and to live on until the children were grown up and if we both died then the money would be there to cover the cost of raising them.

nic2075 wrote: »

Sammy, thats actually something I was thinking about the other night. We have nothing in place for the kids. no life insurance, wills or savings.
This will be our year to get it sorted.

I think out main thing to think about is who will bring up the kids. Now we will have 3 its hard who decide who should take them.
My Sil and Bil and 2 kids already (one is 9 and one 6 months old) I like the way Sil brings up her kids and is similar to our values. However OH doesnt really speak to his brother much and they are working hard to make ends meet as it is.

Both my sisters have no kids. One is only just married and is 26 so I feel she should be allowed to live her life a bit with hubby.
My other sister isnt married but has been with her OH for 15 years! She is also skint but I think she is the best person to take them on in terms of being similar to us.

Oh's parents live in a 2 bed flat in Glasgow, and work very hard. I think the 3 kids would be too much for MIl.
so that also leaves my parents. They are the best equipped as far as space, can drive, nice area etc. But its a hard conversation to have as it would seem i favour my family more.

Im worried that if we didnt make a will it would be a huge family fight. Id want to make sure that whoever they went to, the other side of the family would be able to see them as much as poss.

Hopefully nothing will happen to us, but you have to be prepared.

Im not sure where to start with wills. ive never ever spoke to a lawyer for anything. Does it cost a lot? Would one will be enough or do we need one each as we are not married. so many confusing things to deal with lol.

If you have life insurance then you won't need to take into account whether the people can afford to look after the children as you will be providing the money. It isn't actually that expensive - mine is about £6 and OH's is about £10.

We wrote our own wills but if you are not married then I wouldn't recommend doing it yourself. I think there's an annual "make a will" month when lots of solicitors will do wills for free but not sure when it is (and they may only offer "standard" wills for free).

Sammy_Girl wrote: »

ETA: Do you all have a feeling of when you will pop. It's prob just wishful thinking but I'm sure I will go early - not massively - maybe a few days.

I was sure I would be early and I was. Which I was very pleased about as everyone told me I would be late because "first babies are always late". OH and I were both first babies who were early though which is why I thought I would be early.

GarnetLady

Heaven sake I have no memory at all!

Yup, it's the bargain M&S one. It'ss still in it's box, but it has a diagram on it that clearly shows holes in the frame that can only be for adjusting the height.

Chakani

alamaya wrote: »

Is this all normal? Because everyone else i talk to on other forums gets kicking every day all day

Completely normal - and I would be surprised if anyone really had kicks all day every day! Baby might just be kicking towards your back or placenta when you have quiet days, and towards the front, where there are more nerves when you feel them more - there is still lots and lots of room for swimming around in there

galvanizersbaby

Teenie_D wrote: »

What a chatty lot you are this afternoon LOL!

Well that's the hygienist done and dusted for a while, was sick afterwards though _pale_

Have scoured the town for Scampi Fries and I can't find them anywhere have one last place to look though.

LOL @ Giz yeah baby poo is quite intriguing and you will find yourself discussing it with parents/oh/friends I :rotfl:have had some crackers and been forced to cut DD's vest off it was so bad :D

I'm not anti cloth either and in fact all for it, it is just all the extra washing and trying to get things dried that puts me off too. In fact I would say that the ones going to be using disposables seem to be in a minority in this forum.

As far as guardianship is concerned we are a bit stuck too, I have thought about it for a couple of years but I just don't have anyone that could take over that role. We have friends andi family but nobody really suitable, either they are not maternal or have had their own family or not settled enough. It does concern me at times.

Annibee glad you're feeling better, rant,moan, cry away we all do it as some point, and you certainly don't come across as someone who moans all the time, I usually find you quite upbeat

lol Teenie! - that brings back memories of poo squirting up the back of vests and sleepsuits!
Glad I'm not the only one that feels a bit daunted by the washing and drying aspect of the washables.:o
OH works in the city and won't be back until late in the evenings so I'm anticipating the summer hols with 2 kids and baby so don't want to get myself in a tizz and spend all my time trying to wash and dry expensive nappies I've invested in - gotta have some time with DS and DD too!

alamaya

thanks people

I am sane honestly when i feel her flicks lol.
Just go into insane worry person when i dont feel much lol.

Teenie_D

LOL! Of course!!! I was wondering why I didn't have any baby vest/sleepsuits from DD I probably had to bin most of them

SusanC_2

Teenie_D wrote: »

I'm not anti cloth either and in fact all for it, it is just all the extra washing and trying to get things dried that puts me off too. In fact I would say that the ones going to be using disposables seem to be in a minority in this forum.

I think the population of this forum is probably unrepresentative of the general population though.

In terms of drying, unless you have a dryer terry squares are the only practical option. The only time we found drying a problem was when we had lots of rainy days in the summer because without the central heating on things just didn't dry quickly enough to keep up but we had disposables available as a back up option so used them when we were behind. (Although actually that only happened in the early days when we were also using more nappies than average because of doing elimination communication.)

In terms of extra washing, I think it's down to personal preference - I'd rather have a bit of extra washing than keep having to shop for nappies and empty the bin all the time so for me it was less work.

galvanizersbaby

alamaya wrote: »

thanks people

I am sane honestly when i feel her flicks lol.
Just go into insane worry person when i dont feel much lol.

Hi alamaya

I was a bit like this with my first pregnancy - always worried as DS never seemed to move much and I was really late feeling the movements also - in fact DS could not be bothered to move head down in time and was discovered lying breech at 39 weeks with no room to move about in the end.

Get the midwife to check you out tomorrow and put your mind at rest x

Chakani

Azariaz wrote: »

Hi all, havent been on this thread yet but just wanted to say hi:D, i recognise some of the names from 12 week and ttc threads, im 21 weeks tomorrow yay!:) Just need a little support i think, just found out we dont qualify for sure start maternisty grant that we were relying on and my mum hasnt spoken to me since christmas so just having a feel sorry for me day!:o

Hope you are all well xxxx

Hi and welcome - you'll get plenty of support on here, they might all be bonkers, but they are nice really. I exclude myself from that, as I am grumpy and overdue, so not nice at all today

Teenie_D

SusanC wrote: »

I think the population of this forum is probably unrepresentative of the general population though.

.

Oh yes I do realise that, I am just aware and pleasantly surprised at the amount of peple on this forum who are going to give it a go