Is this a strange request?

Tropez

Well, I think it is kind of strange...

My partner has been living here for a few months now and last night she asked if we could move bedrooms to the upstairs room. I live in a dormer bungalow, so all but one of the rooms are on the ground level, including the current bedroom which is at the back of the house, facing out towards the garden.

The upstairs room has barely been used since I moved in. In fact, it has nothing in it but various bits of junk I've been too lazy to sort through. It is big enough to be made into a bedroom, although it would certainly require redecorating and there is a lack of light in that room, although this may not be an issue. The one thing that could be a problem is I have an existing injury which means my movement is somewhat limited when I initially wake up (after exercising it a little it is fine, just clamps up when I've not moved in a while) which means that I would have to have a bathroom installed upstairs if that became the bedroom because trying to tackle stairs first thing could lead to a trip to the A&E

Now, obviously, this would cost some money, particularly as where DIY is concerned I'm about as proficient as a lobotomised lemming.

I don't necessarily mind spending the money for it as I've been saving up to get the driveway done sometime next year so I could just postpone that and put the money towards sorting the upstairs room but I'm just not entirely sure what the issue is with the current bedroom. My partner said that she just found it difficult to sleep well there but when I asked her why exactly (was it bird noise or something for instance?) she just said it didn't feel right to her. :think:

pulliptears

could be a number of reasons. For me personally I couldnt sleep in a downstairs bedroom because I have the window open all night and Id be terrified of burglars.

Have you lived there long? Maybe she feels that she wants a room thats exclusive to the two of you and not somewhere where you have perhaps taken ex girlfriends?

Personally I think its a nice idea, you can both choose the decor and she can have a room where she feels comfortable and she has perhaps made her own mark on it?

Tropez

pulliptears wrote: »

could be a number of reasons. For me personally I couldnt sleep in a downstairs bedroom because I have the window open all night and Id be terrified of burglars.

Have you lived there long? Maybe she feels that she wants a room thats exclusive to the two of you and not somewhere where you have perhaps taken ex girlfriends?

Personally I think its a nice idea, you can both choose the decor and she can have a room where she feels comfortable and she has perhaps made her own mark on it?

Hi, thanks for the response.

Without wishing to tempt fate I don't think a burglar could get in; not there at least. It is next to impossible to get into the back garden due to the layout of the street and plot although with the way my luck is going lately the gods will now be conspiring to make me eat those words! :rotfl:

I bought the house while I was with her, so ex-girlfriend thing shouldn't be a problem. We started seeing each other while I was in the process of moving as it happens, two/three weeks before the day the house became mine I think.

If she really wants to start using the upstairs room then I don't mind so much, I just really want that driveway sorted...

JoJoB

Does she realise that you would need to put in a bathroom? Maybe she doesn't actually realise the cost and effort involved in moving upstairs and just thinks it's a lick of paint job. Also how long have you been together? I think this has a bearing on whether requests of this nature are reasonable or not!

As for the idea in itself - I think it would maximise the space in your bungalow and add value. Would be much nicer to have the room in proper use than just full of junk. Then it frees up a room downstairs for a study or dining room or guest room. Overall it could be a very nice arrangement.

pulliptears

Tropez wrote: »

Hi, thanks for the response.

Without wishing to tempt fate I don't think a burglar could get in; not there at least. It is next to impossible to get into the back garden due to the layout of the street and plot although with the way my luck is going lately the gods will now be conspiring to make me eat those words! :rotfl:

I bought the house while I was with her, so ex-girlfriend thing shouldn't be a problem. We started seeing each other while I was in the process of moving as it happens, two/three weeks before the day the house became mine I think.

If she really wants to start using the upstairs room then I don't mind so much, I just really want that driveway sorted...

have you asked her why she doesn't feel comfortable? She's probably got some mad reason why (we are women, we think strangely hehe)

My best friend lives in a dormer with a gorgeous big bedroom and en suite upstairs, but still sleeps downstairs. Even if the windows weren't an issue for me I think I'd still be happier up there. See, women. Odd

Tropez

JoJoB wrote: »

Does she realise that you would need to put in a bathroom? Maybe she doesn't actually realise the cost and effort involved in moving upstairs and just thinks it's a lick of paint job. Also how long have you been together? I think this has a bearing on whether requests of this nature are reasonable or not!

As for the idea in itself - I think it would maximise the space in your bungalow and add value. Would be much nicer to have the room in proper use than just full of junk. Then it frees up a room downstairs for a study or dining room or guest room. Overall it could be a very nice arrangement.

We've been together coming up to about four years now and she's been living here since around June/July time (she'd kill me if she knew I'd already forgotten the exact date :rotfl:).

I assume she knows that I'll have to get a bathroom fitted but I will clarify that with her.

January20

I can understand her request. I couldn't sleep well in a downstairs bedroom either. I too sleep with the window open, but even with the window shut I would feel safer upstairs. Also, the position of the bed is important, so that might have something to do with it?

It's a shame to have a room upstairs big enough to be a bedroom with a bathroom and not use it really.

Tropez

pulliptears wrote: »

have you asked her why she doesn't feel comfortable? She's probably got some mad reason why (we are women, we think strangely hehe)

My best friend lives in a dormer with a gorgeous big bedroom and en suite upstairs, but still sleeps downstairs. Even if the windows weren't an issue for me I think I'd still be happier up there. See, women. Odd

Her current reasoning is it "just feels weird" or various other phrases along those lines with the exact same meaning. She does make me chuckle sometimes.

I know better than to say that women are odd, even if they're the ones making the statement first... it leads down a bad road.... :silenced:

SugarSpun

I hated sleeping downstairs in my old ground floor flat and didn't have a full nights' sleep till I moved out. She might be the same way.

Talk to her about the cost involved, maybe?

Tropez

January20 wrote: »

I can understand her request. I couldn't sleep well in a downstairs bedroom either. I too sleep with the window open, but even with the window shut I would feel safer upstairs. Also, the position of the bed is important, so that might have something to do with it?

It's a shame to have a room upstairs big enough to be a bedroom with a bathroom and not use it really.

I should have clarified; while the upstairs room is big enough for a bedroom, once a bathroom has been added, even trying to keep things very minimal it will still be much smaller than the current main bedroom and unfortunately it is quite narrow.

birduk

I am the same! I find it very strange sleeping downstairs- just because I think that bedrooms are 'meant' to be upstairs. It is the psychological effect of going upstairs to bed maybe- a different place. It is the same reason I refuse to let my boyfriend eat in bed!

However, he has a flat with a bedroom on the same level as everything else and grew up in a bungalow- he loves it. I find it really hard to sleep in his flat though. Not really any sane reason I suppose, but it is always easier to break into a downstairs bedroom. It is also the same reason I HAVE to have the bedroom door shut- in case I wake up to find someone stood in the doorway. Yup, I know I am bonkers and paranoid!