My partner has left home with our son

damsidebear

looks like i have no choice, this whole situation is so overwhelming

damsidebear

I just know i'll break down when i see him tomorrow granted i'll be over the moon but it will be a struggle.

think i better try and go for some sleep but i'm not even tired anymore, i honestly thought we could have sorted things out amicably but it's not looking like that now My ex also intimated that if i want to go down the legal route she will also and pursue getting ££ from my house/our home! great........

Kimitatsu

damsidebear wrote: »

I just know i'll break down when i see him tomorrow granted i'll be over the moon but it will be a struggle.

think i better try and go for some sleep but i'm not even tired anymore, i honestly thought we could have sorted things out amicably but it's not looking like that now My ex also intimated that if i want to go down the legal route she will also and pursue getting ££ from my house/our home! great........

You might want to try posting on the CSA board......they are a knowledgable lot and can help you with applying to the family court etc if you are concerned about costs. You can do it by yourself you dont have to use a solicitor, and there are organisations such as families need fathers who offer someone to come with you as a Mackenzie Friend.

Were you married to your partner? If not and the house is in your name then I think she will find it difficult to make any claim on it at all, although she will be able to make a claim through the CSA for a percentage of your earnings.

I am sorry you have had such a rough call - I think you need to look at getting your son home so that he can come back to nursery and so onto school. His stability and welfare need to put above anything else.

Bloomin_Freezing2

The guy I know had a free one hour with solicitor, then the application was made for an emergency court hearing (re the child). That court hearing hapened by the end of the following week. The child was back at the fathers house, and back attening the normal nursery.

If this is the way your ex wants to play things it's up to you to decide what you want to do and what you can manage. But you have to decide fast if you want to take a similar route.

I wish you well, what a terrible situaion. x

damsidebear

I really do want my son to continue to go to his existing nursery as he is very settled there, i now need to find a family solicitor in my area some time today and get advice, I am going to visit my son today but i will hate leaving him up at her familys house i'd rather he came home with me.

Kimitatsu

damsidebear wrote: »

I really do want my son to continue to go to his existing nursery as he is very settled there, i now need to find a family solicitor in my area some time today and get advice, I am going to visit my son today but i will hate leaving him up at her familys house i'd rather he came home with me.

You can find a solicitor here:

http://www.communitylegaladvice.org.uk/en/legalaid/calculator.jsp

They will be able to tell you if you are entitled to legal aid, and how best to go about making an application to the court. From what you have said you would have a strong case as your son is settled at nursery and your Mum cares for him whilst you are at work. An emergency application can be made to the court and you could have a hearing within 24-72 hours so your son could be back in nursery next week.

BF2 - the emergency application to court makes sense as to why the police and social worker were involved! Thanks for that

donnaessex

Damsidebear I just wanted to post and tell you that my reaction is complete and utter horror for you. I can't imagine how difficult this must be for you coming home and finding your partner and son are not there - it would utterly break my heart. I couldn't imagine my husband running off with my two babies and I would NEVER do that to him either - he's their dad and they love him!

You have been given lots of good advice here and I hope you manage to sort out a solution quickly and amicably for all of your sakes. Good luck and keep us posted.

Donna xxx

Bloomin_Freezing2

BF2 - the emergency application to court makes sense as to why the police and social worker were involved! Thanks for that

You're welcome :beer:

sp1987

Do you know what it is that made her leave? Was it just the arguments, do you both not want to be together anymore, etc? Was she stressed and didn't feel you helped enough (even if you did and she was being unreasonable to think so)?

If she left because of arguments, she may not have wanted your son to witness them and go through that in his childhood. Certainly not the right way to go about that though. The child must be utterly confused as to why their routine and living situation has been completely changed.

From an emotional point of view you need to ascertain to yourself exactly what has gone wrong in your relationship, as you have two different losses at the moment. The one relating to your child has a route to fix that you can concentrate on but you need to know for yourself why the relationship has failed in order to move on and concentrate on your son.

MadDogWoman_2

Damsidebear,

I had a family member go through very similar, wife left taking the children, she'd arranged new schools and everything for them in the new area, my family member got a prohibitive steps order from the court so the children had to continue going to the same schools etc.

Fast forward 18 months, family member given main residence with mum having contact.

2 of the children were of an age to express their wishes which were taken into account.

Many years later sadly the children (their choice) have no contact with mum, they've been too hurt by her.