Nice new house, missus wants to live with parents, baby on way. Advice

pipsta

lynzpower wrote: »

Is she working in Leicester? Is that where she wants to live?

No she is home now, she wants to live near to home.

lynzpower

So do I understand that she inst actually working/ employed at the moment? If this is the case how does she think you both will lbe able to get a mortgage together?

pipsta

mountainofdebt wrote: »

Has her mum got a buyer lined up ?

Her mum has not got anyone lined up but im sure she could sell it quickly.

I have put in oak beams in every room, oak floor, inglenook fireplace with woodburner. I love the place to bits, I have really spent my time on it.

I have no issue selling the house, just want to enjoy the hardwork i have put in, plus get the right price for it plus dont want the stress of moving at the moment.

pipsta

lynzpower wrote: »

So do I understand that she inst actually working/ employed at the moment? If this is the case how does she think you both will lbe able to get a mortgage together?

She works part time together at the moment. my income alone is enough to get a mortgage so not worried about money side of things at the moment.

pipsta

She doesnt like the fact that it is "my" house even though i have asked time and time again for her input, plus she is worried about being in another village to her parents. But hey you got to grow up at some point.

I have no problem with living with parents for a week/month after baby is born but any longer than that i think its important we have our own place. No matter what happens we are going to have her parents constant advice etc ( which is apprieciated) but you know what I mean. And selling up and sorting out getting a new housuse 3 months before birth is not the time to do it!

Any

Does she not like the house????
If she doesn't like the house, that might be the problem.

If she does-why can't she give you the money and you put her name on the deeds? Then the house is both of yours, problem sorted. No reason for anyone to feel like "yours, mine". It's both of you, you both contributed (obviously you already offered to put her name on deeds without the cash, so the only reason I can think of that she also wanted to contribute).

Otherwise - she sounds like a complete nightmare. Spoilt little cow. Probably a bit hormonal with the pregnancy, but because her yummy mummy keeps supporting her in this little game you are going to get nowhere.

Very sorry for you. Good luck.

RAS

Hi

Ignoring the house, does she really want a full-time live-in relationship with you? Have you live together at weekends and in the holidays or has she always run home to mummy and daddy.

lynzpower

pipsta wrote: »

She works part time together at the moment. my income alone is enough to get a mortgage so not worried about money side of things at the moment.

Ive been together with my OH five years, same as you. Id live in a cardboard box with him, end of the earth stuff.

I think she is taking you for a pure mug if you
a) sell your cottage and probably make a loss
b) buy another house with your income only

I can understand that she might feel let down in that you viewed the house without her ( I would be pretty questioning if my OH did this) but I wouldnt hold it against him either which it sounds like she is doing.

I would never choose to live with my paretns over babys father unless there was something seriously dysfunctional going on, but then i wouldn't be in a relationship with someone dysfunctional either.
It is so obviously better for the baby to live with both loving parents.

To me it sounds like she is "nesting" and this can make many women unhinged.

If I were in your shoes I would suggest living there for a bit then considering selling when the little one is school age and you might want to move for schools ( example)

Does she want to live nearer to her parents for childcare support?

Does she drive and have a car to get from the cottage to her parents?

pipsta

lynzpower wrote: »

Ive been together with my OH five years, same as you. Id live in a cardboard box with him, end of the earth stuff.

I think she is taking you for a pure mug if you
a) sell your cottage and probably make a loss
b) buy another house with your income only

I can understand that she might feel let down in that you viewed the house without her ( I would be pretty questioning if my OH did this) but I wouldnt hold it against him either which it sounds like she is doing.

I would never choose to live with my paretns over babys father unless there was something seriously dysfunctional going on, but then i wouldn't be in a relationship with someone dysfunctional either.
It is so obviously better for the baby to live with both loving parents.

To me it sounds like she is "nesting" and this can make many women unhinged.

If I were in your shoes I would suggest living there for a bit then considering selling when the little one is school age and you might want to move for schools ( example)

Does she want to live nearer to her parents for childcare support?

Does she drive and have a car to get from the cottage to her parents?

She has a car so she can drive where she likes.

Her Mum works full time so no childcare support.

Her sister can help but i dont think thats the point. We are having a child,we shouldnt be relying on other people to look after it.

lynzpower

Her sister can help but i dont think thats the point. We are having a child,we shouldnt be relying on other people to look after it.

I completely agree with you.