my gf is totally unrealistic! what do i do?

shebrett

If you do stay together I hope it all works out but my advice would be to think about whether you really want to continue in this relationship. To put in my two cents, her unrealistic expectations are not the problem here. The problem is that for all this time she has not thought it wrong for you to pay for so much of the bills or to give her money/gifts/cheap cars without being as generous to you in return. Look at it another way, if a mate did that to you would you still be friends with them? This is someone you are planning to stay together with I presume and you should have a serious think about what kind of life you will have with someone who puts their needs before yours. Good luck whatever you do.

Googlewhacker

tawse57 wrote: »

Didn't Labour change the law on co-habiting couples in the past year whereas a woman who now shares a home with a man for several years has the exact same claims on the property as if she was married to him?

I seem to recall Harriet Harman talking about this and I thought they had brought it in? Anyone know?

I think this is more for SAHM's not cohabiting couples

sonastin

tawse57 wrote: »

Didn't Labour change the law on co-habiting couples in the past year whereas a woman who now shares a home with a man for several years has the exact same claims on the property as if she was married to him?

I seem to recall Harriet Harman talking about this and I thought they had brought it in? Anyone know?

I'm pretty sure they didn't - certainly wasn't the case 12 months ago when my bf kicked out the sponger who was living off him. If it wasn't for the timing being wrong I'd say she moved on to the OP after she was dumped

olly300

Googlewhacker wrote: »

I think this is more for SAHM's not cohabiting couples

I heard stories from people I worked with who were in their 40s about friends of theirs, male and female, whose cohabiting partner managed to get a claim on their property. They had no children with that partner.

The best advice for the OP has already been given. Go into a pub and talk to some older men. They will set him straight.

Caroline_a

No idea why she needs the gym membership - when did that become a necessity??

catflea

OP

to be absolutly frank, it sounds very much to me like you are being taken for a ride.

if you can genuinely afford the house on your own (factoring in rises in interest rate down the road) then buy it and move in alone - ditch the sponger & her dog.

I'm sorry if that sounds harsh, but I was in a similar position with my ex. The money inequality will just eat away at the relationship and you will be a heck of a lot worse off the further down the line you go.

catflea

Caroline_a wrote: »

No idea why she needs the gym membership - when did that become a necessity??

She may not need it, but once you've signed up gym memberships can be a nightmare to escape.

MobileSaver

olly300 wrote: »

cohabiting partner managed to get a claim on their property.

This may well be true (and indeed perfectly fair) if the cohabiting partner was contributing to the mortgage and/or upkeep of the property.

That's not the case with the OP however. In my opinion the girlfriend needs to either pay her fair share or else take a hike. No brainer really and hear endeth the sermon.

hbklea

just been to have a look at the house and area on a friday night, no gangs of kids about, no muggins going on. just a normal quiet road. now, after speaking to a friend, she seems keen and wants to have another look. my friend who is an estate agent lives in the nxt rd and says its a bargain. but my gf seriously needs to sort out her finances. my mortgage on the property would work out at 375 pm, which i can afford. even at worst my mortgage allows me to swap to an interest, but thats if things got desperate.
i feel i'm doing the right thing in selling the flat, so i just need to work out what i want to do for the future.
thanks to everyone for your advice, its greatly appreciated! :T

neverdespairgirl

I'd wait until she can manage her financial affairs. Otherwise you're heading for a whole world of trouble.