my gf is totally unrealistic! what do i do?

smiler92

Hi

You sound like you are being reasonable. its so easy to get in over your head. If you can afford the house on your own I would say buy it solely in your name. If then your girlfriend decides she cant 'lower' herself to move into the property - then I think you will have your answer!

Not all women are like that I should add. Im not - Im realistic what I can afford - thats why Im in a rabbit hutch :rotfl:

But its far better to find out now than when you are married and perhaps have children. Sorry if this seems harsh but it does sound as though she has a very unrealistic view of 'affordability' and you may end up with a joint mortgage and maybe thousands of pounds of debt if she gets carried away.

Good luck with your decision making :beer:

tawse57

smiler92 wrote: »

Hi



Not all women are like that I should add. Im not - Im realistic what I can afford - thats why Im in a rabbit hutch :rotfl:

Marry me!? :rotfl:

Errata

i want the house, but she doesn't. i can afford the house by myself so i am in 2 minds whether to buy it myself. i dont want to do this, but i'm not prepared to pay rent for the nxt 10 yrs.
thank you for all your responses

I'd say go for it. There's no guarantee that you'll still be together in 1 year, 5 years or 10 years time whatever each of you may feel for the other right now.
If she's clueless about money, and it sounds like she is, take the opportunity of a new house to set some new financial ground rules that she will agree and stick to. Get yourself a good solicitor to make sure she can't have a grab and run raid if you split up.

smiler92

tawse57 wrote: »

Marry me!? :rotfl:

You made me smile :beer:

RAS

hbklea wrote: »

thanks for all your replies, and i'm glad you all dont think its me. i've tried sitting down and working out her finances with her, and she agrees that the £30pm phone and gym membership each are too much. but she's got 1 yr left on the phone..

She can haggle this down if she wants to

hbklea wrote: »

i've cut the gas and elec bill by a 1/4 pa by changing what company she was with. and as she cant control her spending the 3 monthly bill never worked. however this month i have just had to pay it as she says she couldn't afford it. i feel i'm banging my head against a brick wall..

You are because she is nver going to grow up until the crap hits the fan. If she cannot afford to pay the utilty bills, she needs to move out.

hbklea wrote: »

she took out a 4k loan 2 yrs ago which in total will cost her 6k. she says she can afford it, but all that happens is i pay more, more and more. .

Which is why you need out mate.

hbklea wrote: »

i take way 1200pm, compared to her 900pm..

So she needs to pay 42.85 percent of the costs of living in the flat, rent, Ct, utilities, managment charge, food etc.

hbklea wrote: »

i thought her parents would understand about stepping up the ladder, as it was only 5 yrs ago they moved into their ideal property. she's told them she was out of debt, so i may have to go round and speak to them.

No let her explain to them herself that she lied to them.

hbklea wrote: »

i want the house, but she doesn't. i can afford the house by myself so i am in 2 minds whether to buy it myself. i dont want to do this, but i'm not prepared to pay rent for the nxt 10 yrs.

Can I suggest that you take a little time to think this through. Rather than rushing into buying this house because you saw it together, stop for a month or two.

Give 2 month's notice to your illegal tenant, wait a month, then give one month's notice or whatever is need on the rental property.

Move back into your old flat, then think about whether you really do want that house. If you do, then sell aND BUY THE HOUSE FOR YOURSELF. aLSO think about getting a lodger as the income is tax-free.

tawse57

smiler92 wrote: »

You made me smile :beer:

Oh good - that is not an outright rejection then. I won't have to cross another woman off my list... Right, I've run out of brylcreem so it is spittle for hair gel.

Glad I made you smile smiler :T

smiler92

tawse57 wrote: »

Oh good - that is not an outright rejection then. I won't have to cross another woman off my list... Right, I've run out of brylcreem so it is spittle for hair gel.

Glad I made you smile smiler :T

:rotfl:

Sorry OP for hi-jacking your thread - but a marriage proposal needs serious consideration.


Now where is that brochure for the 19 bedroom mansion I had my eye on

tawse57

smiler92 wrote: »

:rotfl:

Sorry OP for hi-jacking your thread - but a marriage proposal needs serious consideration.


Now where is that brochure for the 19 bedroom mansion I had my eye on

I am happy with the 19 bedroom mansion as long as we can have a leather and rubber dungeon as a play-room.

Right, let me know when you have won the lotto

giddypenguin

You say she can't control her spending??? That's crap and you know it. Tell her to grow up and sort herself out. If you can't afford it, don't buy it - simples.

smiler92

tawse57 wrote: »

I am happy with the 19 bedroom mansion as long as we can have a leather and rubber dungeon as a play-room.

Right, let me know when you have won the lotto

:eek::eek:

:rotfl: