Help please

lloydlf

Just another thought my Dad was a painter and decorator for many years and would come home covered in paint surely you would have noticed if he was sparkling clean everyday ??

gratefulforhelp_2

northernrocknufc wrote: »

Im getting some where. A local solicitor that works of a Sunday. They have emailed me back and offered to see me on Tuesday.

Well done. This is good for now, ultimately you need a solicitor experienced in family law.

Its a good question, was he painty when he picked you up every day?

If so, I'm thinking he's heading you off to try to convince you not to claim for child support.

eta changing the barrel of the lock is a good idea. Keep the old one and replace it when you leave. Would your Dad do it if you're not sure how? (don't mean to be sexist, its just I wouldn't know how).

thatgirlsam

i too think he has been working and claiming

would he even have been able to get finance if unemployed?

and also, if he wasn't working but you say he said he was a painter and decorater,,, how comes you didn't notice no-one was ringing him for jobs or that he didn't advertise anywhere?

i know i am suspicious and might have got this all wrong but i get the impression you were fully aware of the fact he was claiming and you were working and now you have split up you are 'testing' this story to see how beleivable it is

i sincerely apologise if thats wrong, just how its coming across to me

jackieglasgow

I can see why you see it like that, thatgirlsam, but I know someone who was claiming disability benefit for four years whilst working on a self employed basis, and his partner had genuinely no idea it was going on. He was claiming council tax benefit too and when she was giving him money for the mortgage and council tax bills he was gambling it away, she had no idea until the benefit investigators came knocking on the door asking for him and she said he was at work! That relationship didn't last very long after that.

thatgirlsam

jackieglasgow wrote: »

I can see why you see it like that, thatgirlsam, but I know someone who was claiming disability benefit for four years whilst working on a self employed basis, and his partner had genuinely no idea it was going on. He was claiming council tax benefit too and when she was giving him money for the mortgage and council tax bills he was gambling it away, she had no idea until the benefit investigators came knocking on the door asking for him and she said he was at work! That relationship didn't last very long after that.

yeh i know it does happen

just how can someone who was supposedly self employed as a painter and decorater pull that off for 11 years?

why weren't people phoning for jobs

why didn't he advertise

why didn't the OP meet one person he worked for or with for 11 years.. or anyone he had ever done a job for

and as someone else pointed out were his clothes covered in paint at the end of the day?

just sounds like the OP might have known what was going on to me

sorry OP

January20

thatgirlsam wrote: »

ynt at the end of the day?

just sounds like the OP might have known what was going on to me

sorry OP

Did you really have to post this unhelpful and quite nasty comment?
You DO NOT have enough details from the OP's post to say that she knew what was going on! Nothing like kicking somebody when they're down hey?

thatgirlsam

January20 wrote: »

Did you really have to post this unhelpful and quite nasty comment?
You DO NOT have enough details from the OP's post to say that she knew what was going on! Nothing like kicking somebody when they're down hey?

i didn't mean it to be nasty

the OP has my sincere apology if i got it wrong

i said it SOUNDS like she MIGHT have known

thats all, no need to jump down my throat!

something just doesn't seem right to me

vaio

thatgirlsam wrote: »

....... i get the impression you were fully aware of the fact he was claiming and you were working........

the other alternative is the husband has told her a pack of lies to try and convince her to leave her home and hand over a wedge of cash for the car

thatgirlsam

vaio wrote: »

the other alternative is the husband has told her a pack of lies to try and convince her to leave her home and hand over a wedge of cash for the car

of course that could have happened

the problem is also if the husband was claiming housing benefit while she was working then she might have to prove she didn't know what he was doing

nattyt

Oh goodness i really really feel for you. Sometimes things go on right under our noses and we genuinely have no idea. Not the same but years ago my ex-boyfriend used to say he was going to work but went clubbing and stupid stuff like that. Took a loan out for him which i then paid back...god i was thick!! As for the house thing if it is as he says all in his name and hes claiming benefits and you live there then hes in BIG trouble. Especially after 11 years. You need to write everything down, save things from PC, print it all off etc. I wouldn't let your daughter see him until you know where things stand. This is a man who has had no regard for her. Saying about taking the car and you having to leave your home is disgusting. That is your childs roof over her head, her sanctuary. The housing may even allow you to stay as you have a child and realistically they are going to have to house you anyway. Good luck.Please keepus posted.Big hugs and i'm thinking of you. xxxx