MSE Pregnancy Club 19

Krystaltips

My Mum is one of those people that acts the business in front of others and couldn't do enough for you if it makes her look good, but once the novelty wears off then you don't see her for dust...

I think if you recognise that side of their personality and know that you can't rely on them then you just begin to accept that is the way they are and unfortunately you can't change them...

It also helps me that my MIL is so despicable she makes my Mum look like Mother Theresa! Hubby isn't talking to her at the moment and it makes life so much more peacefull when she's not in the background manipulating him...

rach

Thanks for the birth plans, CAFCs is similar to the outline I want I think, as you say fuzz i will do bullet points too. just want to get something done for mw appt tomorrow so I can discuss with her. Consultant appointment now next thurs when I will be 38+5 so it may all change then anyway.

tinkwings

Hi - is it just me or does anyone else feel shattered at the moment?

At 29 weeks i assumed I would be full of beans but I am so tired all the time it really frustrates me :mad: I hate not being able to get on and do things and when I try to get on with things I pay the price and feel totally wrecked :mad:

I am such an independant person and hate asking for help or to have people do things also doesn't help that I am a control freak and feel that if I don't do it it won't be done correctly

How do you cope with being tired???????????

hngrymummy

Great news Giz

Got more pills. Yay. :j I can have a life again, and hopefully lose the lovely red spots around my eyes. I did assure the Dr that I wouldn't take them all the time - only when I needed them.

Finally got through to the scan department (I'm sure that's not it's real name). Got a scan next Wednesday. I had hoped for the following week, but they were adamant that it had to be at 20 weeks, and they're fully booked for a couple of weeks anyway, so I got the last appointment.

Hope everyone's having a good day. x

rach

Ok, this is where i've got to, happy to have any thoughts or point out anything I've missed. I know it's possible that things will go way differently but it's really just helping me think through it all

Would like my medical issues to be foremost in mind of staff at all times:
1. Born with Congenital Dislocation of the Hips (on abduction frame and then frog plaster when 6 months old)
2. History of hip pain in recent years, though have been very keen walker
3. Developed SPD in mid pregnancy, now on crutches and very immobile. Very concerned about any permanent hip or pelvis damage during labour as job and recreation relies on large amounts of long distance walking.

Preferences for labour and delivery:
Above all the main concern is that the baby is delivered safely. I would like to be fully informed of what is happening to me and the options available to me. I want all procedures explained to me if possible first.

• · Birthing partner is husband. I would like him to be with me through all procedures if he is comfortable. Please be aware he is uncomfortable in hospitals and very squeamish therefore is there to support me rather than be at the business end of things! If I have to have an emergency c/section and my husband is not comfortable coming in, stand by will be my mum or mother in law if my mum if one of them is there.
• · If i do need an emergency c section I would like this to be clearly explained to my husband.
• · Would like to use TENS machine in first stages (have my own maternity TENS machine)
• · Would like to have the option of part labour in water, be it pool, bath or shower for relaxation. I do not plan to birth in pool as my husband is uncomfortable with the idea.
• · Would like to use birthing ball if possible
• · Happy for heartbeat to be monitored via belt, I am unlikely to be able to be very mobile anyway
• · Prefer gas and air as pain relief but if I’m struggling/look like I’m struggling would like staff to suggest further options. Would like to avoid pethedine if possible as I understand it can cause feeding problems for the baby.
• · If epidural is given it is imperative that someone is aware of how far I can comfortably open my legs due to SPD and that this is monitored at all times.
• · Immediate skin to skin contact, before the baby is cleaned up or the cord cut. Husband does not wish to cut the cord.
• · Happy for the baby to receive vitamin K injection
• · I am happy to receive the injection to speed up delivery of the placenta
• · Intend to breastfeed and will persevere. I would like staff to help me with this if necessary. No formula or bottles to be given unless medically indicated and agreed by me first.

sweaty_betty

That sounds like a sensible birth plan Rach.

I'm not bothering with one, I've been booked in for induction a week on Monday (at 38+1 - so will be queue-jumping by a couple of weeks), with pretty much everything laid out in front of me (series of gels/pessaries, then breaking waters and using drip - then an emergency c-section if things don't progress). Anything else I have no preferences for. Although they did say I'd have to decide beforehand if I was going to have an epidural or not - how am I going to know that before I know how much pain I'm in??

Had an interesting conversation with the obs drs - they said I could choose between c-section and induction, I said I didn't really like the idea of either, they asked me how I'd like to give birth, I said I'd like to either wake up and the baby would be there, or have it beamed out of me - like on star trek... Surprisingly that's not an option .

Am a bit fed up about it all - as I said last night, going to look around the delivery really freaked me out as it was so cold and clinical looking, then going to look around the birthing suite (which was so much nicer) knowing I'd never be allowed in it just left me feeling really miserable and dreading it all. I know that I should be pleased that I have a date for induction and so a general idea of when the baby will arrive, so I'll be spared the long wait a lot of other people have had, but at the moment I'm desperate for labour to start on it's own and progress really quickly so I'm in hospital for the absolute minimum amount of time.

And on top of that they said I had excessive amniotic fluid, so am at increased risk of prolapsed cord when the waters go.

Sorry to have a moan, just feeling a bit fed up with being pregnant, but at the same time dreading the delivery!

Make-it-3

Moneysaver12 - Sorry your mum is mucking you around and this is typical behaviour from her. I guess its best to follow your own advice and not let her get to you. Expect nothing, then anything that does come your way either in gifts/or attention is a bonus.

twoflower169

Hi all,

I haven't read back properly but I do know from lurking that its congrats to courgette and gena on the births of their babies!

I have had a day of it with my ds (he is 2 and a half) when I picked him up from nursery yesterday they told me he had been hair pulling and hitting, which they were as shocked as me about this as we have never had this before! AArRrrrggggHHH. On top of this, the last week he has been a real pain in the butt, crying moaning, whinging, throwing himself down, at everything! I had to take him clothes shopping as he needs some trousers that are not ankle swingers! He didn't want to walk, can't carry him now at 23weeks very far, definitely not round shops! He cried, moaned, laid down on floor and was just a general pain and very embarrasing! When we had done in the 1 big shop I said he could have a toy, but he misbehaved so badly whilst picking something I refused to buy anything. I was then goign to treat us both tokunch in costa, but he played up so bad when I said he had to have a sandwich as well as some cake that I picked him up and walked out, because he cried and shouted at me because I said no to just cake! Very embarrasing everyone staring at me, and probably thinking "cant control the little brat, and look she's pregnant again"! Not one other mother gave me a look of support, which I always try to do as I know its horrid!

Anyway, moan over, I only hope it improves as we are away with friends this wend who have never met ds so hoping their first impressions are not awful!

Meanwhile, baby on board certainly knows how to use his/her feet and hands! Sitting down quietly is not an option thats when I get battered! But hey I now only have 10weeks left at work (only work 2days) well 9 actually as I have some leave to take!

Hope everyone else is ok, will read back when ds finally goes down for the night! Sorry to have rambled and moaned the whole way through post!

LilacPixie

Rach looks fine.
My only thoughts were episiotomy, if you need one do you want them to just do it or do you want told about it first? Forceps/vontuse how does that tally with your pelvic issues? would you rather they took you for a c/s if delivery looks to be problematic or would you go the forceps option. scalp monitoring of baby? does your OH want skin to skin. Do you or OH want to see head crowning? Do you or OH want to see the placenta? Do you want to keep the placenta? Who wants to find out the sex? do you want OH to announce it to the room? WHat will you be delivering in? What do you want to happen to it? Do you want a catheter? I said no both times then had issues so I needed one both times and TBH after giving birth, dodgy pelvis and little to no mobility I feel it was a good move 18 hours before i needed t get up and have a pee.

I opted to deliver in a hospital gown with DD2 and then changed when all over with. DD1 i delivered in my own nightshirt and heamorraged and told them to just send it to the incinarator.

Preference for hospital stay? I personally wanted up and showered asap. My hospital gives tea and toast for afterwards so I popped in I take milk and two sugars please

I personally would say would like to use G&A for pain relief and will indicate if i require anything more. in my experience some MW's are opiate happy. One during DD2 induction said i'll just go get you some pethadine umm no you won't i'm fine as I am.

rach

Thanks Lillac, really helpful. I'll add some of those bits in..will speak to DH about them tonight. Need to read a bit more about forceps/ventouse.