Intentionally homeless - what are the options

RX-78

kate252 wrote: »

enabling someone and lendng someone sensible support so that they arent alone in life are two different things!!!
enablers dont address issues they just cover them over and they feed into a persons bad behaviour
people who have the strength to support can do this without doing everything for them
i had a housing support worker fr a while- now i dnt see him as debts and housing issues have been resolved- but my support worker was very big on promoting self reliance and independance- he said if he did eveything for me ultiately he wouldnt be helping- this is true- thank goodness he hasnt pandered and molly coddled- as i wouldnt be as independant as i am now with things- however- he stll cae out to see me and still was there for me over many issue enabling and supporting are different

I think the problem is, from the OP's partners comments it sounds very much like the son will just be bailed out, not supported to improve his life. TBH, it sounds like they have tried all the encouragement & support and this person still didn't listen.

p.s. if an adult uni student isn't intelligent enough to be self sufficient in this greatly over welfared cushy country, then there is something seriously wrongly with standard of our higher education.

TwistedPsycho

RX-78: Your "PS" certainly raises an interesting point slightly aside from the OP's situation. The sheer numbers of young people heading to universities, increasing year on year over recent decades, must surely mean that the educational bar to entry is much lower. I actually believe that if I was 5 years older I would not have had the A-Level grades to get into university at all.

I know that this is probably for a different thread; but I question whether teenagers, like our OP's son, head towards university with the pretence that it is a few more years of education whereas in reality they should be looking at going straight into hard labour or apprentiships.

donny909

Are we missing some relevant information from the op here or have I not read it?. The op has said about the son having left full time education in Jan 10?!. And futher more he has fallen behind with his rent arrears?. By the way how does rent get paid to the landlord while at uni?, via the grant or part time employment via the student?. Also before or after this period he went on an expensive trip with "m8's" to New York or something?.

I'd firstly ask does uni grants not get paid every term or for every 12 months seeing as there can never be any certaincy that any single person will see there first term out?.

Also seeing as he seemingly walked out of uni jan 10. Would not his privliages for being a member of higher education have been stoped at the same time seeing as assumingly the uni would have blocked all his payments from that point onwards?.

So what has he been doing for income fore the last 7 months?. He'd assuminglt not be getting any more grant payments?, the bank would have assuminglt have blocked his bank account in this time?. As he is still seemingly falling behind on a weekly basis with rent arrears are we to assume therefor he has no official income?.

Has he not signed on for JSA in the last 7 months?. In fact what has he been doing for an income for the last 7 months?.

TwistedPsycho

donny909 wrote: »

Are we missing some relevant information from the op here or have I not read it?. The op has said about the son having left full time education in Jan 10?!. And futher more he has fallen behind with his rent arrears?. By the way how does rent get paid to the landlord while at uni?, via the grant or part time employment via the student?. Also before or after this period he went on an expensive trip with "m8's" to New York or something?.

I'd firstly ask does uni grants not get paid every term or for every 12 months seeing as there can never be any certaincy that any single person will see there first term out?.

Also seeing as he seemingly walked out of uni jan 10. Would not his privliages for being a member of higher education have been stoped at the same time seeing as assumingly the uni would have blocked all his payments from that point onwards?.

So what has he been doing for income fore the last 7 months?. He'd assuminglt not be getting any more grant payments?, the bank would have assuminglt have blocked his bank account in this time?. As he is still seemingly falling behind on a weekly basis with rent arrears are we to assume therefor he has no official income?.

Has he not signed on for JSA in the last 7 months?. In fact what has he been doing for an income for the last 7 months?.

I can't imagine that anything has changed, but when I was at university back in 1999-2004, I would pay my rent out of my student loan which was paid every semester (I realise that recently the Loans administrators have been less than prompt in paying!). I would then use my part-time employment to fund most of my living and social life..... or rather my credit cards and loans (hence my signiture). The Student Loans system back then was nothing to do with the University and I doubt it does now either.

IF this gentleman simply never turned up then I would suggest that it will take a while for the university to catch up wth him. From experience, the university I went to rarely took roll call in lectures and although they sometimes did in the smaller "study" sessions, you could easily miss a few and not have any consequences. The university considered me as in charge of my own education - so to speak.

I would imagine when it came to the annual renewal then the university says "This guy never took his end of semester exams" or something, but I have no knowledge of that.

It is entirely plausable that this gentleman received his spring and summer grants. The latter more certainly as he only left in Janurary and I do not get the impression that it was a planned departure that he informed the university about.

Hope this clarifies things.

harz99

Just to bring everybody back on track as a lot of posters are not quite seeing the correct picture:-

The OP is a woman; the child is an adult male, who is NOT her child; the OPs partner is the adult male child's father.

If you doubt me read post 1 on this thread, and look at her posts in other threads.

HTH

deborahdee

I have been this year on january i gave up my course as i got myself into rent arrears... then came the eviction notices.. then came the court dates... all i should say is try and put yourself in his shoes.. i am only 19 and i feel i sacrificed alot as i didn,t meet bursary requirments as they think that under the age of 21 my parents have to fork out for me as they both worked and everything is means tested, although in reality it is a diffferent situation.. so giving advice from college i got told to leave and financially stable myself with benefits.. witch leaves me with no job or home and no help ... and not a good future for myself. All i wanted to do is better myself and i coudny even do that.. so basiclly help him as much as you can
giving lectures dont work!!

i am intentially homeless and due a mental breakdown because of the situation i am in and to be quite honest !!

poet123

Jowo wrote: »

But how does the mother feel about his exclusion from your joint home? Is the son counting on her hospitality, hoping to walk away from his self-inflicted problems?

Sounds like he may have an AST in which case he can stay in the property until the landlord gains a court order after proper notice has been served but really none of the forum members can advise you without knowing having further specific information.

As well as urging him to contact an organisation that can give him free expert advice, get him to look up the local council website to see if they offer a deposit guarantee scheme for tenants on low income/in housing need. His additional problems will include finding a landlord that will accept a tenant on benefits and/or one with a poor credit history and/or one with a bad previous landlord reference.

viewings wrote: »

a - Probably annoyed, but I made my feelings clear months ago and if that was not communicated to him or he chose to ignore that then thats not my fault
b- I would imagine so

I have my own problems which means I would not find it easy to have him here. As I say, if this was a crisis like his accommodation caught fire and he was working, had shown he can plan and stand on his own feet, then I would feel confident that it would be temporary and he would sort himself out. But this is not the same thing, he has shown no effort whatsoever to find work, to manage his money, to take on the seriousness of the situation. He sounds bored whenever he is told what he needs to do, but he can find the money to go to New York (last year), buy this gadget, that gadget etc, so I have no confidence that if he was helped out, he would learn to take responsibility.

I have asked him to find out what friends can let him stay for the odd night, he says he doesnt want to do this

harz99 wrote: »

Just to bring everybody back on track as a lot of posters are not quite seeing the correct picture:-

The OP is a woman; the child is an adult male, who is NOT her child; the OPs partner is the adult male child's father.

If you doubt me read post 1 on this thread, and look at her posts in other threads.

HTH

The above posts would suggest otherwise, when asked about his mother and their joint home, the answer was that the op had communicated with her about it.

clairehi

viewings wrote: »

My partners adult son was at university. He stopped attending in Jan 10

Is he still officially a student or not? it is August now so presumably he has not sat his exams etc this year - I would have thought that if he has not yet been kicked out, then he will not be re-registering in Sept/Oct time. At which point he will be unemployed and entitled to housing benefit and income based JSA if they still call it that.