Clearmydebts - new chapter to becoming debt free before moving home

Dinah93

I'm really sorry to hear about your friends baby, that's awful news.

starnac

Dinah I've just noticed you got married on our wedding anniversary. How lovely.

Glad you had a lovely time CMD. Awful news about your friend though. I can't even begin to imagine what that must feel like. Try not to think about it too much though. I missed most of being pregnant with DD due to worrying about what could go wrong. I just wished every day away and didn't enjoy it at all.

Hope you are keeping well

tirlittan

Hi CMD.
Glad you had a lovely holiday in Portugal,it must of been lovely.
Don't stress too much about the debt. Just make a realistic plan to get rid of it whilst being able to live and you'll be fine.
Sorry to hear about your friend, that must devastating. But don't let get to you. Enjoy.

savingholmes

tirlittan wrote: »

Hi CMD.
Glad you had a lovely holiday in Portugal,it must of been lovely.
Don't stress too much about the debt. Just make a realistic plan to get rid of it whilst being able to live and you'll be fine.
Sorry to hear about your friend, that must devastating. But don't let get to you. Enjoy.

I agree with Tirl.... Your debt is a lot better than it has been. We all struggle with over-spending from time to time or we wouldn't be on here in this part of the forum so we understand. As Tirl says - try to come up with a realistic plan to move forward step by step rather than expecting huge leaps forward and one day you will get there...

I am so sorry to hear about your friend = I am sure its devastating for all concerned. It is so horrible to hear news like that when you are pregnant yourself too... Hugs.... Really hope everything is okay with you and that you can support your friend while looking after yourself.... and Max of course

clearmydebts

Hi all,

Thanks for the supportive words. They are OH's friends so I can't really support them by ringing or pop into see them (as they live in Ireland) but they know we are thinking of them and we will send them a card and something to put on the grave in a few weeks time when it seems appropriate. I have been thinking of it but TBH hae put it to the back of mind so I don't get too upset.

clearmydebts

I know some of you know that I was having a hard time at work when I started. A combination of a micromanager and my hormones. Well everything was fine but it seems to have flared up again.

I am really annoyed at my boss. She contacted me several times (via text) yesterday (on my day off) to ask me to ring her asap, or failing that when it is actually my day to work (i.e. tomorrow) about non-urgent things that can easily be left until tomorrow. I am annoyed that she is so unprofessional as to text me on my personal mobile and I want to say something but I am afraid I will blow my top.

She also has unrealistic expectations about things that I am setting up in work, and when I had to cancel some things (due to lack of interest) she is making a huge deal out of it and making me feel like I have personally failed. I have spoken to other workers and they have experienced this in the past so it's not just me! With regards to having to cancel something, I know I have put the work in trying to promote it but I can't physically make people sign up to doing a voluntary thing. Some people are just away on holidays and can't make it. It's a fact of life. I don't like cancelling things either and I am missing a very important family occasion in Ireland because I thought I would be working.

I am so so mad. I know I am working hard but the reality is that this is a full-time job packed into part-time hours. I am having to look at my emails and respond on my days off (as well as working some weekends) and am building up TOIL very quickly. Yet, when I take TOIl then I am falling behind and am made to feel like I am not working hard enough.

clearmydebts

I am also worried about several things at the moment which is isn't helping the work situation.

I am so homesick and am sick of living in limbo. I do know people over here but can't be bothered to go and meet them at the moment. I just want to move home

I am also worried about going into labour before my Mum comes over (she is due over 3 days before I am due) and that OH will have to mind Max and I will be left in labour on my own. I am also worried about getting to the hospital as it is quite a bit away and we will have to get a cab there but sometimes it is really busy and you can get turned away to a hospital way futher away.

I also worry about how I will cope with Max and the new baby. He is up at 6am every morning and if I haven't had much sleep how will I function. There is no-one I can call on to take him out for a walk and give me a few hours sleep. I have friends here but my good ones are male and have no babies and the one that has a baby is due another one a few weeks after me and doesn't live near me.

I am just fed up.

wendz86

That sounds horrible CMD, not what you need when you should be relaxing for your baby. How long do you have left there before you go on leave?

Could you speak to someone higher or HR or someone about her contacting your private mobile about non urgent matters and the fact that you are doing a full time job in part time hours as that isn't fair. I know might make things awkward with your boss so depends how you feel really, is a tricky one!

clearmydebts

wendz86 wrote: »

That sounds horrible CMD, not what you need when you should be relaxing for your baby. How long do you have left there before you go on leave?

Could you speak to someone higher or HR or someone about her contacting your private mobile about non urgent matters and the fact that you are doing a full time job in part time hours as that isn't fair. I know might make things awkward with your boss so depends how you feel really, is a tricky one!

Thanks Wendz. I know I am not the only one which makes me feel slightly better about it. I am going to leave at 34 weeks which is 6 weeks time (so not long). It just doesn't help that I feel upset and rubbish in general anyway.

I was thinking of maybe speaking to my boss first off. I was wondering if it is better to frame it in an email so I have it as eveidence. I am not sure.

Tete_en_l'Air

CMD, you can only do what you can do. Yes we all have busy times at work when we might stay late every night for a week to get things done but it shouldn't be the norm. If it's a full-time job packed into part time hours then that's her problem as your manager not yours. She should NOT be contacting you on your days off - just as an example, I was off on Monday not doing anything special, just at home. One of the venues I deal with called my colleague about something relatively trivial and asked for my personal mobile number to call me on my day off to go over it, to which he replied "absolutely not!" and that's how it should be.

Please try not to let work stress you, it's not important. Really will anyone die as a result of one thing not being done? No. Some things are trivial enough to just not be done.

Could you ask to meet with her formally to express concerns over your workload? And if this fails, go on the sick with stress and then she'll realise how much you DO do! (very NIM-esque!)