Help seeing a male's point of view?

misgrace

sandraroffey wrote: »

my exhusband always kept me short of money. i had to ask for every single thing. right down to personal items. if he said no, i didnt get. they dont change you know. and you grow to hate them!!!!!!!!!!

its their way of being in control.

I had a friend who was in the same position, they had 3 kids, and he didnt want her to work, but she had to ask him for everything, the most embarressing one was she had to ask him for tampons :eek:, he would even try and tell her her how long a packet should last for!!!!
She had to ask him for nappies, baby stuff, as well as the usual food money, its unbelievable in this day and age that some men like to control thier partners, but in doing so, they are controlling thier kids too:mad:.

donnaessex

Brilliant take on the situatuon thistledome - a different way to read things for sure.

donnaessex

mikey72 wrote: »

She's 35, she's read all the posts, I think she knows what she's doing by now.

Not sure she does, thanks.

mikey72

donnaessex wrote: »

Not sure she does, thanks.

Why on earth are you thanking me?
I was pointing out how condescending and arrogant you are.
Badgering her by pm doesn’t really answer what she asked.
Or do you really think running her life over the internet is actually what she asked for.

sharnad

74jax wrote: »

But of he lived in his appartment he'd be paying less. He doesn't have a mortgage or have to pay for heating as it's so well insulated. Really all he paid for was his tv and internet. So in a way he is also worse off living with me, which I think is why we decided on a 50/50 split.

So he didnt have gas or electric in his house pay council tax have a phone line water rates house insurance

feel like im forgetting something

GEEGEE8

mikey72 wrote: »

Why on earth are you thanking me?
I was pointing out how condescending and arrogant you are.
Badgering her by pm doesn’t really answer what she asked.
Or do you really think running her life over the internet is actually what she asked for.

What's up with you!? :eek: did I miss something, apart from her saying she PM'd the OP. What's wrong with that?

Fang_3

sharnad wrote: »

So he didnt have gas or electric in his house pay council tax have a phone line water rates house insurance

feel like im forgetting something

To read the thread? She's already answered all that.

Fang_3

misgrace wrote: »

I had a friend who was in the same position, they had 3 kids, and he didnt want her to work, but she had to ask him for everything, the most embarressing one was she had to ask him for tampons :eek:, he would even try and tell her her how long a packet should last for!!!!
She had to ask him for nappies, baby stuff, as well as the usual food money, its unbelievable in this day and age that some men like to control thier partners, but in doing so, they are controlling thier kids too:mad:.

Did she lose the ability to work? No one can control you unless you allow it.

misgrace

Fang wrote: »

Did she lose the ability to work? No one can control you unless you allow it.

OUCH! Fang by name and Fang by nature :eek: No she did not lose the ability to work, I said that he did not want her to work, she had 3 kids under the age of 5, anyhoo, why I am explaining this to you?, you always come across as tunnel visioned anyway....:(

sharnad

74jax wrote: »

He is a grown man and can buy for hwo he choses. In the past he has said is there anything she wants etc. and will give me £20 or so buy something. Like I said he makes sure at Christmas she has all the uptodate games etc. This year for her birthday I just didn't ask him. It wasn't deliberate or anything i just didn't. You're right, to me this isn't a big deal.

I just find it really weird that you have been in a relationship for 5 years and he doesnt by a birthday present for your daughter

How old is she, if I was your daughter it would make me feel pretty !!!!!!