Any termination threads on here?

louise3965

Abortion isnt a dirty secret, its a medical procedure that's been legal for 40 years and I think the more people like the OP talk about it and bring it out into the open, the better. I had one about 15 years ago and though it wasnt exactly a party, it was the right decision.

I had the medical sort though, so dont really remember much of the actual procedure, just remember crying for weeks but not knowing why really. But time heals and if its the right decision, and you have support, it's likely to be fine. Much love xxxx

rachfriar78

I have never been in your stuation Icey I just wanted to send hugs and hope everything goes ok for you x

Please try and ignore the few negative comments on this thread as they aren't very helpful. I think you are very brave for bringing it to light as it is still such a taboo subject when it shouldn't be. People will always have different opinions on it though. I think there needs tto be more women like you that sspeak up on it.

There is a website called netmums and they have a section on abortion you might want to read. In general its a very supportive site x

Triangle

Hello Icey

I am happy to share my experience with you. As another poster has noted this is still a taboo subject, despite being legal for 40 years, and whilst senstivity is needed due to the emotiveness of it, I do feel that that it should be talked about openly.

I had a termination five years ago in my final year of university. It was totally the wrong time for me. I was very early on, 6 or 7 weeks. I was given the first set of pills at the hospital on a wednesday then went back on the friday for the second, in from 7am until 4pm. I was treated with respect and not at all judged - something which I hope will be repeated on this thread. I personally did not feel regret nor deep unhappiness and had the support of a couple of fantastic friends and feel lucky I live in such a time and place where this can occur safely.

Wishing you all the best, take care
T

heretolearn_2

Don't be so frightened. Of course we all feel fear of the unknown, but this is quite a simple procedure and not too terrible! I haven't had this but a couple of friends have - it'll be like a very heavy period, so get the paracetamol in, loads of night-time sanitary towels, and be prepared for an uncomfortable time. But it's not so bad. Do you know those stick on heat pads they sell for period pains, that you stick to your stomach? They helped my friend a lot.

Re the feelings side - I've got two points to make:
1) Don't forget you have been pregnant, then you are not, and that sends your hormones flying. It's normal to have a few 'odd' days or be tearful - same as new mums get the hormonal baby blues for the first couple of days. It's just your hormones and doesn't mean you'll feel the same way a bit later on.
2) While abortion is something women are jumping for joy at the thought of doing, it needn't be a big trauma either. I think there's a lot of subtle pressure to feel 'sorry' or 'regretful' or 'guilty' about having an abortion (not from the medical practitioners, don't worry about that, I mean from society in general). Although some women do feel that way, there is nothing wrong with just feeling relieved and having no issues with it. Plenty of women never look back and have no problems at all. So don't feel that you have to be expressing anything you don't really feel, or that there is something wrong with you if you just pick yourself up and carry on. That's the best possible result!

Britwife

Icey77 wrote: »

Please read my first post, this is exactly why I have not posted on the Miscarriage support thread, because I do not belong there.

I appreciate that everyone has their views on this subject and I'm glad that so far it hasn't decended into a full scale war of Pro Life vs Right to chose.

Again, I must say thankyou to you all for you good wishes and your support. It really is good to know that there are people out there in the ether that will do their best to help by giving the benefit of their experience or simply their hugs, which can never be underestimated!

I will be keeping up with the thread and I will come back after the event. I'm sure there will be other women in my position that are reading the thread and I promise to do my bit to help them should they ask.

G'night peeps x

Why would you refer to this as an event? Why not use the actual term or a form of the term? This just comes off cold.

brians_daughter

Icy, the only advice i can give you is this... if you are 100% certian of your decision then everything will be ok in the end.

I am not going to speak of the medical side but the afterwards - which a lot of ppl cant begin to think about in such a difficult time, You have your BF and his support which is an important factor. If you are 100% on your decision and have his support then you will work through it. Many women go through the what ifs, regret etc. This is a perfectly normal reaction, You may not grieve your decision but you may be upset that 'things will never be the same again' They will, it takes love, time and talking to get it all out of your system. The clinic should offer a councelling service. Please ensure you take advantage of this - even if you dont think it is appropriate at the time take the details - you never know if/when you may want to talk. If you dont need it then great - but if you do you have the means to contact them. On th eother hand you may simply feel relief at the fact it is all over. You will probably feel teary a few days afterwards, this is hormone related and will pass. Just keep strong, keep talking and let us know how you are going on

I wish you hugs love and prayers at this terrible cross roads in your life. There is a forum on 'ehealth' all about medical terminations and may answer some of your questions

Person_one

Britwife wrote: »

Why would you refer to this as an event? Why not use the actual term or a form of the term? This just comes off cold.

Why would you pick on the OP's choice of word? This just comes off as unnecessarily mean and picky.

peachyprice

heretolearn wrote: »

2) While abortion is something women are jumping for joy at the thought of doing, it needn't be a big trauma either. I think there's a lot of subtle pressure to feel 'sorry' or 'regretful' or 'guilty' about having an abortion (not from the medical practitioners, don't worry about that, I mean from society in general). Although some women do feel that way, there is nothing wrong with just feeling relieved and having no issues with it. Plenty of women never look back and have no problems at all. So don't feel that you have to be expressing anything you don't really feel, or that there is something wrong with you if you just pick yourself up and carry on. That's the best possible result!

Very wise words from heretolearn, and I agree wholeheartedly, don't feel bad if you don't feel bad Icey.

I haven't had a medical termination, only a full on surgical one so can't help on the 'what will happen' front. But afterwards I felt total relief that it was over and haven't regretted it for a day since, which instills the fact that it was abolutley the right decision for me.

Take care of yourself. ((((()))))

peachyprice

Britwife wrote: »

Why would you refer to this as an event? Why not use the actual term or a form of the term? This just comes off cold.

Oh for goodness sake, it's a turn of phrase. What a petty thing to pick up on.

Person_one

peachyprice wrote: »

Oh for goodness sake, it's a turn of phrase. What a petty thing to pick up on.

Britwife seems unable to either put aside her own feelings about abortion and actually support/help the OP or recognise that this thread is not for her and leave it alone.