Daffy's 'a nice cup of tea cheers you up' diary

Pippilongstocking

Big sleep needed for you - and hope things get a bit brighter and healthier tomorrow xxxx

Well done on volunteering for the party - -

Karmacat

What an awful day you've had, Cheery - hope you're getting to bed now, and snuggling in ..... take care

xxx

RubySewSew

Thank you for hugs and support. I wouldn't think for a second that any of you were being smart or insensitive or I wouldn't be here!!

I have set myself a deadline - redemption penalty is up in 3 years. If my situation is still this bad then I will sell and pay off my debts off. I had 5 months off sick last year which made me realise that I would actually be better off on benefits and in rented accommodation. As a self employed home owner I got no support at all whilst I was sick.

The question of choice is a big one at the moment. Being cash poor and time rich allowed me to make some privileged decisions about the future. I have in the last few months pinned everything on training as a teacher. Having spent a few weeks as a Teaching Assistant the reality of it is kicking in and I'm doing a lot of reflection on if this is the best choice for me and for my family. I'm trying to expand that reflection but my biggest concern is how much it is taking away from the rest of my life. What I really want to do is make dresses. So what is stopping me from making dresses?! The thing that appealed to me about teaching was being autonomous and creative. Why not just be autonomous and creative?! I'm with Daffs on this, you can always earn more money but you can never buy back time.

Thank you for keeping me going for the last couple of days x

RubySewSew

get well soon cheery!

*sending you some soup*

missymoo81

hey ruby, sounds like you've had a lot of time to reflect, which we all could do with sometimes, and you're right, you can and should put your dreams into gear and see what you can achieve. And you're so right with the buy back time comment, you and daffs, I realised this and gave up my 12hour a day job/career to spend more time with OH and, it is the best thing I ever did, I've halved my wages but doubled my happiness, so it can be done honeybunch.

Keep smiling, you're positivity is infectious.

x

Karmacat

Ruby, I'm loving your post! But as for being a teacher giving you autonomy - well, its very helpful that your holidays coincide with your children's holidays, so thats autonomy - but, about 90% of my family are teachers, including my sister, and in the state system, there's not that much autonomy around. What did you think of your TA experience?

If you love making dresses, then thats the way to go - good for you! Maybe its not f/t at the mo, but the market for a local ... seamstress? what is the word? .... must be huge.

Mags30

RubySewSew wrote: »

I had 5 months off sick last year which made me realise that I would actually be better off on benefits and in rented accommodation. As a self employed home owner I got no support at all whilst I was sick.

Having spent a few weeks as a Teaching Assistant the reality of it is kicking in and I'm doing a lot of reflection on if this is the best choice for me and for my family

Know what you mean about the benefits, that thought crosses my mind almost every day. In Ireland where I am jobseekers allowance is €196 a week with loads more if you have children + rent allowance, fuel allowance, medical card. A lot of people choose to be unemployed because it's so generous.

What you said about the teaching made me think of something cheery and others were discussing on memorygirl's thread. They were talking about phd's but I think this could apply to any learning situation. They were saying that maintaining the initial interest and motivation can be very difficult when the work involved gets tedious and difficult. Maybe that's what's wrong.

Then there's Hypno who's both a stockbroker and a hypnotherapist. There's no reason why you couldn't be a teacher and a dress designer. You could do both part-time.

Just some things to think about before you go making big decisions.

x

Cheery_Daff

Ooh Ruby, what interesting revalations! Sometimes it really is useful to look at what's *behind* your goals - the autonomy and creativity bit behind wanting to be a teacher, for example, rather than focusing just on 'I want to be a teacher'. Sometimes the reasons *why* can lead you down a whole different and interesting path!

CAn't write much, at work with a lemsip, just about to start cutting and sticking and playing with velcro and felt tips - I love my job

(also trying to avoid common room full of pink and purple sparkly cupcakes :eek:)

RubySewSew

What job do you do cheery that allows you to play with felt tips and velcro?! That's the kind of job I want! There is very little autonomy in the classroom Karmacat and that is the problem. I teach adults as my other job and have complete autonomy. In the school classroom we're told to be reflective practitioners but don't have any opportunity to exercise that. It's frustrating not being able to use the best of my skills because of bureaucracy. As a TA I enjoy begin with the kids but it is physically, mentally and emotionally exhausting. I don't feel like I have anything left for my own kids. Let alone the poor old boyfriend! I have to remember why I settled on teacher training in the first place - because it is 1 year's worth of training doing something I enjoy and at the end of it I could have a career job or a little low key part time job or work overseas or never set foot in a classroom again. I think I have to find a dressmaking course to and you're right - maybe a little p/t operation could be just the ticket! I think I lost sight of things a bit there! Must be the tiredness!

Thanks girls!

MrsMoo2U

RubySewSew wrote: »

What job do you do cheery that allows you to play with felt tips and velcro?! That's the kind of job I want! There is very little autonomy in the classroom Karmacat and that is the problem. I teach adults as my other job and have complete autonomy. In the school classroom we're told to be reflective practitioners but don't have any opportunity to exercise that. It's frustrating not being able to use the best of my skills because of bureaucracy. As a TA I enjoy begin with the kids but it is physically, mentally and emotionally exhausting. I don't feel like I have anything left for my own kids. Let alone the poor old boyfriend! I have to remember why I settled on teacher training in the first place - because it is 1 year's worth of training doing something I enjoy and at the end of it I could have a career job or a little low key part time job or work overseas or never set foot in a classroom again. I think I have to find a dressmaking course to and you're right - maybe a little p/t operation could be just the ticket! I think I lost sight of things a bit there! Must be the tiredness!

Thanks girls!

Sorry to jump in again but just wanted to say that my friend who is very creative and should be an artist/designer decided to do teacher training and eventually began to teach DT. Not wanting to put you off as I dont know what age you want to teach but he has ended up having a breakdown. Lots of reasons but does include the amount of pressure teaching brought. I was wondering, if you enjoy dressmaking, and you are training to teach, could you teach in a College for Design such as stage costumes/dressmaking etc. I think they get paid a fair whack for night school and you could fit your hours around your family. Also how about setting up a weekend class and running it as a little business to run alongside anything else you do.

Cheery - I hope that you are feeling a bit better after the lemsip. If you have some port and brandy in try having them mixed for a nightcap. Guarantee you will feel better in the morning.