I Don't Have Kids Why Pay For Someone Else's?

Zaine_UK

tinkerbell28 wrote: »

Life is not fair, the clue is in the word WIFE. Whatever happened she got the house presuming as she had kids.

You think you are going to fare any better as the boyfriend who is not actively interested in the kids as "dad".

What do you think you would be entitled to exactly. If you are scared your gf is going to cheat again, so you want dibs on the house to screw her over, walk away and think of those kids.

Well don't you at least understand my worries? Anyway no matter what you lot think of me your wrong. It was just a bad choice with the thread title. im going to say to her tonight that i'll pay all her mortgage every month (so she will be mortgage free) and that should make up for the lost £135 when i move in (Oh and btw i don't want anything back from her, or to be on the mortgage).

But i refuse to pay for everything with her kids. The kids dad can do that.

Zaine_UK

I'm done... thank you.

tattycath

Zaine_UK wrote: »

Well don't you at least understand my worries? Anyway no matter what you lot think of me your wrong. It was just a bad choice with the thread title. im going to say to her tonight that i'll pay all her mortgage every month (so she will be mortgage free) and that should make up for the lost £135 when i move in (Oh and btw i don't want anything back from her, or to be on the mortgage).

That's good.

But i refuse to pay for everything with her kids. The kids dad can do that.[/QUOTE

You should make sure you tell her that bit too!!!!

tinkerbell28

Zaine_UK wrote: »

Well don't you at least understand my worries? Anyway no matter what you lot think of me your wrong. It was just a bad choice with the thread title. im going to say to her tonight that i'll pay all her mortgage every month (so she will be mortgage free) and that should make up for the lost £135 when i move in (Oh and btw i don't want anything back from her, or to be on the mortgage).

But i refuse to pay for everything with her kids. The kids dad can do that.

Do you not see how you are setting yourself up for a massive fall? You WILL be the childrens STEPFATHER you will have responsibilities to them, if you can't take it stick to living apart.

You seriously are going to sit back and watch your gf struggle for shoes/trips/clothes, kids are expensive you know, coining the phrase they are not my kids.

I give it a month and tbh, it's no wonder the kids don't like you if that's the attitude they get from you, they are children, they see you interested in the mother but they get sidelined as they are not yours, very damaging indeed to a child. The mother, I give her a month of living with you before the lust wears off.

C_Mababejive

Zaine_UK wrote: »

I know someone who saved for a 4 bedroom house for years. Him and his wife moved in. His wife had an affair. Now he lives in a one bedroom bedsit and he goes around to see his wife (Still in the 4 bedroom house) and see's her lover mowing the front garden. Is that fair?

OK I'll fess up...I do mow the lawn but her husband didnt. She tells me he was hopeless round the house (and in bed). When she gave him a list of jobs he would just have a huff and sit watching football or go down the pub. All she wanted to do was have him do his jobs then she could feel all happy and secure inside,make him his tea and then ease his aches and pains with a nice massage at bedtime.

I gave her the attention that he didnt.

A few jobs now and again is a small price to pay for this nice detached house i now live in.

tattycath

C_Mababejive wrote: »

OK I'll fess up...I do mow the lawn but her husband didnt. She tells me he was hopeless round the house (and in bed). When she gave him a list of jobs he would just have a huff and sit watching football or go down the pub. All she wanted to do was have him do his jobs then she could feel all happy and secure inside,make him his tea and then ease his aches and pains with a nice massage at bedtime.

I gave her the attention that he didnt.

A few jobs now and again is a small price to pay for this nice detached house i now live in.

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

tinktinktinkerbell

tbf i can totally see why he wont pay for the kids, they arnt his and they arnt his step kids either so why should he, the REAL DAD should pay for them

jackieblack

Zaine_UK wrote: »

I've choosen not to have kids.

But you've chosen to date a woman who has them
as others have said, they're a package

kerry13238

Zaine_UK wrote: »

Well don't you at least understand my worries? Anyway no matter what you lot think of me your wrong. It was just a bad choice with the thread title. im going to say to her tonight that i'll pay all her mortgage every month (so she will be mortgage free) and that should make up for the lost £135 when i move in (Oh and btw i don't want anything back from her, or to be on the mortgage).

But i refuse to pay for everything with her kids. The kids dad can do that.

i have been in this situation as the woman with the kids and have a mortgage after 7 years of being together and me having a house with around £85,000 of equity we deciede to buy together and when we did he signed a decloration of trust which ment the £85,000 i put in if we ever split up and sold the house then the first £85,000 would be shared. maybe suggest that after a year of living together if things have gone well look at getting you added then. however if you did spilt up you couldnt get any share or ask her to leave unless the kids are over 18 or she moves someone else in.
when you say about losing the tax credits and why should you pay her mortgage try and look at it this way if you were renting you would have 2 lots of bills ect.
i do agree with other posters about the kids part if my partner spoke about my kids as if they were a inconvineince or a compromise i would leave him

dmg24

tinktinktinkerbell wrote: »

tbf i can totally see why he wont pay for the kids, they arnt his and they arnt his step kids either so why should he, the REAL DAD should pay for them

What if dad can't/ won't pay - why should the children suffer because of selfish adults?