Girlfriend leaving but wants half of house

comping_cat

hankc35 wrote:

Why are you assuming this? The OP has suggested that he can look after his son, so yes maybe maintenance is due to him HE may not want to bring HIS child up on benefits, I think that the child and the family home is best left with the OP, and the mother needs to see what child care allowance that she and her new partner can pay to the OP.

But what about the other child? There is a lot more to think of than just 'the father wants the child'. Im assuming the mother also wants the child, and there is another to think of as well.

hankc35

Why are you assuming this, do you know him.

no, if you read the thread its what the OP posted :rolleyes:

hankc35

catowen wrote:

But what about the other child? There is a lot more to think of than just 'the father wants the child'. Im assuming the mother also wants the child, and there is another to think of as well.

I assume "the other child" will become the financial responsability of "new boy friend" I assume he wants the girl and the kid?

marleyboy

I dont think his case is a sexist term, at the end of the day, if the role was reversed, would you be stating the same quote. Basically, she had an affair, whatever the reasons behind that, If it was HIm that had been cheating, would it be a case of, "thats what happens when you play with fire"! typically its always the mans fault. as for him not wanting financial gain, is that a reason for him to accept financial LOSS. Men and Women are equal, i think you should take that into account. I own my house, have a partner and have taken on her children as my own. But you can bet your dollar, she will never get a joint mortgage with me. Mainly because of attitudes like yours, which tell me "Why take that risk, If she wants to go, See ya later". Is that just me being sexist?

redmandarin wrote:

I felt quite sorry for you until you had a go at lisa_75! But now I am compelled to throw in a few suggestions!

This sounds a bit of an arrogant statement for such a "caring" man to make, steve! Maybe she left of her own accord?


Maybe women's attitude will change a little, when men's attitudes changes a lot! teacup is right about the 'this attitude' comment. It is about men in general, but we know that they are not all the same (similar, maybe?;))!



Come on now, seriously? If you're that great, then why did she find another bloke instead of you and why is it that she can't stand being with you to such a degree that she wants to leave you?


Really? Are you sure? Then why not let her and the children have the house?! The fact that you weren't married has everything to do with it, in terms of children. You may regard it a canny move, not being married, thinking that this would mean your partner has no rights to the property, but it actually gives you less in terms of rights to custody of your son. Given that you are very unlikely to gain custody of the child and gain the house, do you really want to try and turf your son (and his half brother) out of it?




She sounds like a women who's had dealings with men to me! The old "woman scorned" chestnut is exactly what men say when they're behaviour or attitudes are challenged by women!

Take advice on it steve, but I don't think you've got much of a leg to stand on here, legally.

And finally, think of the children, first and foremost in all this - and good luck to you all for the future!

Phatmouse

hankc35 wrote:

I assume "the other child" will become the financial responsability of "new boy friend" I assume he wants the girl and the kid?

You assume too much.

Who is to say that he ever meets the kids, they may have just been for a pizza. She may have no intentions of taking it further and may not be looking for another 'dad'. How many dates constitutes 'becoming financially responsible'.

Phatmouse

hankc35 wrote:

no, if you read the thread its what the OP posted :rolleyes:

I did read it, and I feel for them all.

I think this matter may be a bit close to home for you, you seem a little bitter towards her.

Every situation is different.

pink_phantom

maternal instinct is not an outdated concept, it is fact. Women have more nurturing hormones than men as it was and is their role as the carer traditionally, and the mans role as provider. I know that was many many years ago and attitudes have changed but the hormones remain the same.

krisskross

How old are the lads? It may be that they make the decision about who they live with. Certainly their wishes need to be considered. I assume the older of the 2 is a young man rather than a child.

Phatmouse

marleyboy wrote:

I dont think his case is a sexist term, at the end of the day, if the role was reversed, would you be stating the same quote. Basically, she had an affair, whatever the reasons behind that, If it was HIm that had been cheating, would it be a case of, "thats what happens when you play with fire"! typically its always the mans fault. as for him not wanting financial gain, is that a reason for him to accept financial LOSS. Men and Women are equal, i think you should take that into account. I own my house, have a partner and have taken on her children as my own. But you can bet your dollar, she will never get a joint mortgage with me. Mainly because of attitudes like yours, which tell me "Why take that risk, If she wants to go, See ya later". Is that just me being sexist?

I'm not sure about it being sexist, but if your partner will never be able to own part of the home she lives in beacuse of the attitudes of the women you don't live with, its a little sad. Does she shoulder the responsability for all of life !!!!!!!s or just the ones with tits.

pink_phantom

Who said she had an affair? I thought they split THEN she found a new partner.