How do I move on from a relationship break-up?

hieveryone

AlwaysWorking, my heart goes out to you as I know exactly what you are going through Lots of other people do, and it just goes to show you are not alone in this feeling.

What you are also not alone in is the fact that we have all survived it and come out the other side stronger. I was with someone for 5 years and adored the ground he walked on. I was absolutely devastated when he left me, lost a lot of weight like you said, and looked like !!!!!! in general for a good 3-4 months.

Some of my friends now joke that I'm too independent - I won't let someone take away my power and put me in that position again, and that's a good thing. I know in myself that I can be happy alone, or with someone, and that it's my choice - not theirs.

Good luck, I hope you feel better soon.

BitterAndTwisted

AlwaysWorking: I'm ASTOUNDED at what you appear to have achieved in just one afternoon. If you carry on like that you'll be running the country in no time.

Good work, lady! Making plans and getting things done is a perfect way to make you feel like you're the one in control of your life. Well done

AlwaysWorking

BitterAndTwisted wrote: »

AlwaysWorking: I'm ASTOUNDED at what you appear to have achieved in just one afternoon. If you carry on like that you'll be running the country in no time.

:rotfl:I guess that would sort out my housing problems...a relocation to Downing Street may take my mind off things!!!

Today is Day 2 of getting over the ex fiance! So far this morning I've only cried once, which is a huge improvement for me! I've also resisted the temptation to phone or text him. A poster earlier recommended a site called soyouvebeendumped and it talks about 'NC', no contact. The site has actually helped, as reading through other people's stories has made me realise that I'm not going mad, a lot of my emotions and reactions are completely normal. It says you should ask yourself WHY you want contact. If you text the best that can happen is that s/he will text back, but it is unlikely to work miracles and make them come back.

I've also replied to all the emails/texts I've gotten from friends over the last couple of months. I've apologised for not getting in touch sooner and explained that things have been hard, but I'm trying to help myself move on and would love to meet up for coffee or whatever to catch up properly. Given the hours I work, my availability is rubbish, but at least I'm making contact with the outside world again!

I've also made an appointment to get my hair cut. I was growing it for the wedding...but there is no need now and if I get it cut, it'll prevent me from scaping it back into a ponytail that really does nothing for me! I've deleted the 'Wedding' file on my email account and cancelled all the wedding emails I was receiving from sites. I'm not yet at the stage where I can delete all of his emails. I've deleted most, except the ones when we first met as they're so special to me. All in time!

I hope everyone is having a lovely morning, and thank you all for your support so far!

xxxx

Redman30

Brilliant, keep it up!

whitewing

AlwaysWorking,

Haven't got time to post really, but wanted to say well done, and agree totally with the 'no contact'. I speak from experience, even nice guys break your heart, and it's somehow worse as you don't see it coming and then you can't quite let them go.

The sooner you can manage - a clean break is for the best. Good luck.

deedee71

Well done, you're doing great!

Fuzzy_Duck

Blimey you've been busy! Keep it up, you're doing amazingly well. Have fun at the hairdressers- you deserve some pampering and as silly as it sounds looking good on the outside does give you a lift.

AlwaysWorking

Thank you everyone for taking the time to reply. It's like ripping a plaster off - some of these things I have to do quickly and not think about it or the flood gates will open again! I've just closed down the email account I had set up in my married name...that was sad as it's admitting to myself that it is never going to be my name.

One of the friends I replied to has just had a baby and has suggested meeting up. I'm dreading that as I am soooo broody...ex and I had talked about starting to try for a baby as soon as we got married and I was very excited...we both were. We'd talked about it loads and on the day he left me we'd been in a shop that had some toys...he'd picked up a cute one and said we would buy things like this for our daughter.....

This is soooo blooming hard!

jackieglasgow

No reminiscing on this thread!!!! Break the cycle. So, you won't have a baby with him. Just as well, what if he'd decided he didn't want you after the wedding and the baby? Where would that have left you. Concentrate on being a great "auntie" to your friend's baby until your life turns around. The joy from a baby can be almost as rewarding as a close carer than a parent. Glad to hear you sounding so strong, apart from this wee blip, it sounds as if you are really starting to turn your thoughts around. Have a hug to get you through the day. {{{}}} X

deedee71

I hope you are slowly coming to terms with the fact the sun does not shine out of this man's a%%e!!!

No wonder you are having trouble coming to terms with his actions. What a piece of work he is.