Leaving your affairs in order..

Savvy_Sue

Errata wrote: »

Although it seems sensible to leave one's affairs in order, I must confess on a bad day I'm inclined to leave them in a mess leaving those who will inherit to put some spade work in to 'earn' what was my hard earned money that they will be left.

As a joint executor for my Dad, my Mum's response was that the hard work was about to begin, but that hers would be even worse. It's not so much that things are in a mess, but they're complicated, and they just have so much STUFF!

Dad must have had over 100 ties and shirts, some of which had never been worn. There is a small wardrobe full of jackets and coats which I haven't even looked at yet. I have two bin bags of thermal underwear to sort through because my brother might want some although I don't think most of it will fit - I can't just hand over the bin bags because he doesn't usually drive to visit.

Mum is convinced that one of us or our families might want some of these clothes, despite being told that everyone's been asked, everyone's had a chance to take a look, and everyone's wardrobes are bursting.

And what DID he want with an old gramaphone motor?

But of course we can't throw anything away ... I usually come away with my car boot full to bursting, and head off to the charity shop next day. I've checked, they don't mind rags, which means I don't have to obsessively re-sort everything.

pollypenny

I agree with Sue. It was a job and a half to clear my parents house ( bags of wool, anyone?)

But our parents did not one quarter of the stuff that we have accumulated! There's no room for kids in our house now, we've just expanded to fill it!

mommame

As I have a habit of taking off rings/bangles/earrings etc when on a night out and shoving in my handbag/pocket etc I have told my sons to search every pocket and handbag before donating anything.
I have given my sister some old handbags before and she rang to say she had found a gold cross and chain in the little pocket at the back of the bag.
Just a gentle reminder to anyone chucking anything out.

Also I was throwing out old work jeans and just stuck my finger in the tiny pocket that sits above the proper pocket at the front and found £60 in 20s folded so small I almost missed it,oh kept money in the little pocket as emergency money in the event of engine trouble etc.

Be_Happy

Another thing to watch out for is those books that are actually hollow inside and are for use as safes. (I think you can also get 'safe' tins that look like grocery tins eg beans.)

We didn't know that my mother had one and only found out when we were clearing her house after she died. When taking books off the shelf one of them rattled and turned out to contain some of her more valuable jewellery. This could so easily have ended up in the charity shop.

If you have one of these 'safes' do let your family know.

Savvy_Sue

pollypenny wrote: »

I agree with Sue. It was a job and a half to clear my parents house ( bags of wool, anyone?)

Oh, a whole bath full! (They did have another bath and shower and Mum has finally cleared it.)

pollypenny wrote: »

But our parents did not one quarter of the stuff that we have accumulated! There's no room for kids in our house now, we've just expanded to fill it!

Yes, it ought to have inspired me to have a clear out, but it hasn't, yet. With us, it's the books ...

Newly_retired

After I had cleared out my parents house when they died I vowed that I would not let my house get as full as theirs for our children to clear, but now I reckon it is even fuller. I keep trying to get rid of stuff but what goes out is a drop in the ocean.
I have a whole filing cabinet full of financial files, but I have done a summary which should make that side of things easier.

Errata

Anyone who has to clear a parents house can get a pretty loud wake up call. I'm lucky because a wise old aunt told me many years ago 'one in, one out' so my house since then has been pretty clutter free. I cleared my parents house :eek: and I have no idea why my ma had an electric kettle and two spares :rotfl:

pollypenny

I try to impose a 'one in - one out' but it's not very effective.

If I raise my eyes as I'm sitting here , I see 9 books on various aspects of teaching English, in addition to 5 poetry books. Now, I wouldn't part with the poetry, but why the heck am I keeping the text books!!!!

They can go. I'm offer them to a lovely young ex-colleague who is coming for lunch. Will log off and bag them NOW!!!!

Savvy_Sue

Errata wrote: »

I cleared my parents house :eek: and I have no idea why my ma had an electric kettle and two spares :rotfl:

Because you can't throw things away even if they're not working properly / not as nice as another one you have, BUT in those days we couldn't freecycle everything ...

But I'm still awaiting suggestions for why my dad had a gramophone motor. In case anyone's not clear, this was a wind-up gramophone ... and just the motor!

Merrywidow

I have been facinated by all your comments. My mother moved 20 times in her married life with my Policeman father and had conditioned herself to chuck everything on a regular basis. Nothing remains of my school time and growing up or anything else for that matter apart from photos.

When my Father died his desk was organised and everything in order - apart from 10 unsigned credit cards!!!!!

When I moved my mother down to live near me, clearing out her stuff was a doddle and the move was faultless. Oooppss I forgot the attic. Discovered she had no Christmas Decorations a few months later. I often wonder what was stored up there.

There was some humour to all of this. Mum mislaid her visa credit card whilst out with the family. When I tried to cancel it they told me It didint exist as it was cancelled when my father died. Mum had been using this card to buy everything as she understood it went straight off her bank account. When I checked she had no statements, bills, or any deductions on her bank statements. She had been happily spending on this card for several years and made large purchases as well as small. What a pity she mislaid it. She found it in her luggage when she got home but as it was now registered as cancelled her spending days were over.