Baby sleeping help - at our wits end!

Savvy_Sue

I don't know if this would count as controlled crying or not, BUT when DS2 was born someone gave us a musical cot toy which played Fur Elise or something for 10 minutes if fully wound up.

So we used to set this going when we put him down, either at the start of or in the middle of the night, and steel ourselves NOT to go back until it stopped. If he was still crying when it stopped, then obviously there was a problem.

He was very rarely still crying when it stopped, and it helped having something 'fixed' to concentrate on. "I don't have to go back yet, the music is still playing".

Happynewmum

Read this thread and I could relate to some parts.When my son was born I put him in his moses basket.I was so knackered though and found it alot easier to breastfeed him in my bed so he ended up sleeping with me.He would only have naps on me and would fall asleep using me as a dummy.He would be glued to me til bedtime.Then I tried putting him down in my bed on his own for his daytime naps ( obviously making sure he couldnt roll off! ) and that worked BUT i didnt put himdown when he was awake only when he was asleep which some say is a no no.Anyway-it got to a stage where I just wanted him out of the bed because he was getting very restless and kicking me so started putting him in his cot for his naps to get used to.Took him afew weeks and loads of crying but got there.Then I started at nighttimes.....HORRIBLE!Loads of screaming and crying.Didnt let him stay in it all nightjust increased the amount of time per night.To me there were 2 problems-one, him not being with mummy for comfort and two, not knowing how to fall asleep himself.Anyway, hes nearly 11 months old and he sleeps in his cot for naps and at nighttime.He was still crying abit when I put him down but he settled himself.A week ago I put him in his own room which he seems ok about it.What I have found over the last 2 weeks is I put him in his cot, he sits up, then lies down himself, makes afew movements and afew minutes later hes asleep.Never thought that would happen!Only moans if hes really tired and even then doesnt do it too long.Hes come along way so patience is the ley.BUT he still wakes up a good 4-5 times a night, leaving me completely knackered. I give him a little feed ( I know hes not thursty but used me more as a dummy/comfort thing ) then he gets put bac in his cot.This is the next thing I need to sort out but wanted to him to get used to his own room first ( which I think he has ) but now I'm ill through being run down so mentally and physically not ready for it but it will be done!Good luck to anyone who has any of these problems on this thread.Before you have kids you have no idea what you let yourself in for.x

Curious_George_2

angelfairy wrote: »

i did use some of Curious George's advice and kept moving myself closer to the door. i do not know how many times i laid her back down saying 'it's time for sleep'. must have been well into the hundreds.

fingers crossed for a good night. i'm going to try they moving closer to the door thing during the night also, even though it will be dark, but it will also help me with her separation issues of me leaving the bedroom day or night if she is in it alone.

hope everyone else has some progress tonight. not sure what we have is progress, but it's a start xx

you did really well
How old is she?
if shes still in a cot then dont keep going to lay her down, do as i said and stand at the door and turn your back until she sits down, make it clear thats what your doing and she will soon get it... my DS was only just 2 when i did this ad he got it by the 2nd night,
also if your already at the door its less sneaking off! lol

emsywoo123

This thread has terrified me............I have a DD (nearly 7) and am pregnant and freshly single.... :eek:
DD was a fabulous sleeper and always has been, but the broken sleep for feeds is slowly coming back to me............What if bump is a non sleeper :eek::eek:

Ho hum...........It doesn't go on forever........does it :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

angelfairy

Curious_George wrote: »

you did really well
How old is she?
if shes still in a cot then dont keep going to lay her down, do as i said and stand at the door and turn your back until she sits down, make it clear thats what your doing and she will soon get it... my DS was only just 2 when i did this ad he got it by the 2nd night,
also if your already at the door its less sneaking off! lol

she is 13 months.

i faulted somewhere in the hour of 2am though as i brought her in with me. to be honest, i dont know why i did, i think i was half asleep and it was just the 'usual' thing for me to do. she has a cold so is very snuffly and i worry about her breathing so i think this had something to do with it. i was so cross at myself this morning though.

good thing though is that she sleep from that bit before 8am to somewhere in the hour of 2am which is brilliant for her. when she was in bed with me, she woke again around 5am i think, had a little drink and then back to sleep until just after 7am.

Curious George - re 'dont keep laying her down' ... she was sitting herself up as i didn't let her get to the 'standing up' stage. perhaps i should? she will reach out for things to grab when she stands up that's all.

i am going to try it again tonight... been looking online at the blackout blinds as i couldn't get any of the ones that suction cup to your window in town.

will also try and do it when she wakes and not bring her into bed with me

Glamazon

AF - ditto! At 3am he woke up and I just picked him up - it was when I put him down in the spare room I thought !!!!!! am I doing?????

We had a much better night though - just that one wake at 3am and then he slept til 8am :j admittedly in bed with me but that is the first time he's not been wide awake at 6.30am for weeks!

2 nice long naps today so hoping this is the start of something good

tarajayne

This was my little girl until a month ago. She always went to sleep in my arms then would wake in the night and end up in with us. I read that if you are with them when they fall asleep they cry when they wake as they wonder where you are. One month on, (she's 9mths) she goes down at 7.30pm, will stir maybe once or twice but ususally goes off on her own with her dummy. Sometimes she doesn't stir at all for 12hrs. The 1st time I put her in awake she cried for 90mins, it was awful, I went in every 5mins, put her dummy in and walked straight out. The next night was 10mins, then 1min, now usually nothing. Daytime naps are the same. I take her up, low voice constantly talking to her, read a little story and lay her in with her FP Seahorse.

Good Luck. X

Curious_George_2

angelfairy wrote: »

Curious George - re 'dont keep laying her down' ... she was sitting herself up as i didn't let her get to the 'standing up' stage. perhaps i should? she will reach out for things to grab when she stands up that's all.

i am going to try it again tonight... been looking online at the blackout blinds as i couldn't get any of the ones that suction cup to your window in town.

will also try and do it when she wakes and not bring her into bed with me

just remind yourself she is safe in that cot, is it possible to move the things she grabs when stood up? do you mean like the curtains or just toys?

i know taking them into your bed seems like the easy way to get some sleep but the longer that goes on the harder the habit will be to break, and who wants thier kid in bed with them on a long term basis? not me! noisy little beggars they are! duvet stealing hot bodies!

keep it going... you and Glamazon are doing well,
be strong! a couple of hard nights will be worth it in the long run xxxx

helphelphelphelp

Hi there

Am with you on this one! My daughter is nearly one and has only been in her room for a couple of months. She used to wake every couple of hours so thought it would be easier for me to have her in with me if I was getting up every couple of hours. By 9 months I was done in as I hadnt had more than 4 hours full sleep in one go so put her in her own bed in her own room. And she slept til 6.30!

Ok, that was a one off and she was waking at 4 or so which is when i took her back to my bed but am now at the stage when I am leaving her in her own room til 6, and if she wakes, just letting her cry in the hope that if there is nothing worth waking for, she will actually sleep.

It is really hard listening to them cry and for a long time I couldnt do it, but got to the stage of complete exhaustion that I had to, and to be honest she actually sleeps a lot better away from me.

Could you not have your son in your room for a few nights while she gets settled into her own bed without you?

Hope you get it all sorted

Glamazon

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