I am a Bridezilla and my confession is....

PPtobe

Thanks for the reply! Its a hard one to explain - its not that we don't get on really, they are just really rubbish at making an effort for anybody. Its always a matter of people calling them, going to visit them etc rather than vice versa!

We have assumed that this would be far too much effort for them, but I really really hope that they prove us wrong. The only family I have invited are my parents and brother and I would love him to be there, I really would! Its not just the day itself, everyone is basically going on a big holiday together, I would like to share that with him also!

We are trying to look on the positive side though.... less people = more vino for those who come!!

Birdie85

White_Sapphire wrote: »

Birdie, I think you're quite right to not go to this other bride's hen do, after the way she's treated you. If I were in the same boat I'd want to resign as bridesmaid and just not go to her wedding, because it sounds like she's putting a higher priority on outdoing you than on your friendship. It's just such a shame that weddings can sometimes bring out the worst in people, when they buy into the culture of bigger, better, more expensive etc.

My OH wants me to resign but I'm too nice to do it, I don't like upsetting people! Especially as she's already bought my (non-returnable and currently too small!) dress and shoes and she made a point of telling me how expensive the dress was. She has massive self esteem issues so she does have to outdo everyone; when OH and I got engaged we did so because we loved each other and it was the perfect timing for us. She got insanely jealous and for the next 4 months she pestered her OH (who is younger than us and wasn't actually ready to get married) until he caved and bought her a ring, then once he'd bought the ring he then had to propose properly over a candlelit dinner so she'd have a good proposal story! :doh: Oh and since I got a limo on my Hen Party guess what she has to have now?! Everything to do with the wedding is about being 'better' than every other wedding she's been to, it's exhausting! I upset her a little while ago because she'd put something on Facebook about the 'Wedding of the Year' and I commented saying, 'How nice of you to mention my wedding, not long now!' :rotfl:

PPtobe wrote: »

We are getting married abroad in August & my brother and his girlfriend have just booked a holiday for September! We have always thought they wouldn't make the effort to come to ours....considering he is unemployed I cant see how very can afford both!? Not sure if this makes sense but if they didnt come to ours and claimed they couldn't afford it then I could deal with it. However, if they now say that and then go away the following month its a direct snub!

I've been through this too with OH's best/oldest friend. We told him when and where we were getting married as soon as we decided on it even though we couldn't book it. As soon as we booked it we sent him an invite and OH told him he was best man. He said nothing for months then told us that he was going to Florida with his new GF last summer and we got a bit worried because he hadn't booked for our wedding and we know how much a holiday to Florida costs (we're going in September!)... then just before Christmas he told OH that he's really sorry blah blah blah he can't afford to come to our wedding. OH is really upset; like you say, if it was the case of not being able to go on holiday full stop, fine. But to choose another holiday over your wedding is hurtful!

White_Sapphire

Ah, well if he's just being thoughtless (I have two brothers who are a bit similar and have to be sort of shepherded about when it comes to family gatherings, although I think they will pull their fingers out when it comes to my wedding ) then would there be any benefit in being clear with him how important this is to you? If he's not big on marriage himself (completely guessing here) he may not have considered that for him not to be at yours is a big deal. Could either of your parents help things at all? I hope it all works out with the minimum of stress either way

x

PPtobe

White_Sapphire wrote: »

Ah, well if he's just being thoughtless (I have two brothers who are a bit similar and have to be sort of shepherded about when it comes to family gatherings, although I think they will pull their fingers out when it comes to my wedding ) then would there be any benefit in being clear with him how important this is to you? If he's not big on marriage himself (completely guessing here) he may not have considered that for him not to be at yours is a big deal. Could either of your parents help things at all? I hope it all works out with the minimum of stress either way

x

Thats the funny thing - they recently got engaged!! I've asked my parents to have a word with him for me so hopefully all will work out fine!! Thanks for the advice x

Morty_007

if it was the case of not being able to go on holiday full stop, fine. But to choose another holiday over your wedding is hurtful!

I kinda get where you are coming from but how about this....what if they can only afford one holiday a year....and they don't actually want to go where you are having your wedding...I know thats hard to imagine. If my best friend in the world was getting married, i'd move heaven and earth to be there with her...unless she decided to go to America to get married. I don't want to go there. I never have, I never will....not even for her. I'd want to spend my holiday money on a holiday of my choosing over somewhere I DON'T want to go.
Just another point of view x

becca0417

I love this thread. I haven't been too bad so far but good to know its here for future!

bubbles0169

from the begining ive been thinking id get save the dates from vista print, couldnt wait til the time comes to send them as its like the first official announcement of our wedding
now im thiniking about all the people i have to invite and all the people who i cant because of cost and numbers allowed
im wondering whether to send STD's at all and 'spring' the wedding on them in the hope they wont be able to make it:o;):rotfl:

sammy_wheeler

im a bridezilla because:
i dont wan hats at my wedding. i really dont like them and dont want any of my guests to wear one.
im having a photo with every single one of my guests in- and i dont want hats lol!
Can i put this on the invites? haha!

MissPixie

I don't want hats either! I think they look silly and most people can not pull them off lol

laurarobby

im not a hat person but my mum is and she always looks awesome in a hat so its not to bad! i dont think MIL will ware one she may look silly in a hat lol!

im a bridezilla because i ive invited my friends & cousins but not there blokes to my wedding & breakfast (they can come to night though) i cant afford to feed them plus i dont really know them!