I am a Bridezilla and my confession is....



  • purple_butterfly28
    purple_butterfly28 Forumite Posts: 119 Forumite
    Thank you so much whoever started this thread I am desperate need of a rant, before I turn all bridezilla on my Aunt via email!

    So my Aunt as far as I new growing up was a Vegan, sent out the invites in October, with an RSVP data of 30th January (long I know but the wedding isn't until May and wasn't doing Save the dates).

    Very end of December have an email from my Aunt and Uncle that they cannot get on the wedding website, so I helped them through that and turns out their mac book and iphone didn't like the website, but they got on it a different way. I know they had been on it previously as well as the website records the name of people who have been on it and when :whistle:

    Next day have an email back from my Aunt that she can't eat anything on the menus, due to her dietary requirements.
    Ok I say well I know that you are a vegan, but let me know your dietary requirements and then I will pass them onto the venue and get back to you, then give you contact details so you can confirm the menu they are planning for you. (this bit is in bold for a reason)

    So she then sends through a really long ( 3 pages) word document, with all her banned foods, ok foods, ok in small amounts foods and a small section on menu ideas.

    This document is all over the place as some of the banned foods aren't written in the first section but are put in the ok foods in brackets ie all vegetables except (onion family and aubergeines). Now onion family was written in first section but no mention of aubergeines.
    There are also lots of contradictions like she can't have any biscuits, cakes made with butter, but then in another section can eat crumpets with a small amount of butter and a small slice of sponge cake or fruit tart.
    No citrus fruits but drinks lemon and ginger tea.
    Can eat red, yellow and orange peppers but not green.
    Plus several others so it seems as if it is made up/ she just doesn't like the foods.

    Oh and she isn't Vegan as eats, fish (only certain ones though), shrimps, prawns, eggs, and greek yogurt and semi-skimmed milk.

    SO... I put the whole document into a much easier to read spreadsheet, with tabs for banned foods, ok foods and menu suggestions (risotto with no onions, no oils/butter, no garlic, no stock cubes... doesn't sound very tasty)

    I then emailed her to say I'd done this and could she check it(as it had been 2 weeks since emailed last). I then also said to update that I was waiting for the RSVP's to come back in case there were other dietary requirements (know there are 2 vegetarians and a gluten allergy).

    I also told her in the email that I have worked out which meal option could be adapted from my original 3 options to work for her. (which she said all sound fine, so she just wants people to work around her and make a special meal, as she didn't even make any suggestions just gives a list of what she can and can't eat)

    She then e-mails back that she'd contacted the venue with her word doc list, but they had emailed back saying they were very busy with their year end accounts. She then said in her email that they stated they couldn't organize food the night before unless there was a big group booking ( I had explained that I would try to help her with this, but would need to speak to the venue). Also she stated she informed them of the RSVP deadline as she needed to hear back before then.

    I don't know quite why but I just got sooo angry :mad:
    She has been emailing the venue, bothering them and it seems trying to prioritise herself when I've said that I would get back to her with meal suggestions. I didn't give her an email address so she must have researched and contacted them.

    Luckily I have found out from her that it was my wedding co-ordinator she has been emailing. Now I feel like I have to apologise to her for my pushy aunt with all her food preferences.

    As I said to the OH I feel like just giving her a plain jacket potato with beans.

    I had to go have a shower and wash my hair to calm down before I emailed her back.
    I did but politely asking her to send her queries to me in the future so that the venue doesn't get confused... (ie filter mad aunts etc :rotfl:)
    She said sorry for her confusion but she thought I'd told her to contact the venue as well with her list. (now remember the bold part, no I didn't!!!)

    So this evening I'm going to have to email my wedding co-ordinator and apologise for my aunt, god knows what they think of us now. :eek:
    My OH just thinks it's funny, until I pointed out he'd be the same if it was his relative!
    Engaged 25/12/2013 :T
    Marrying my gorgeous fiance 30/05/15 :D
    Saving for the Wedding and Honeymoon :j
  • Andy_89
    Andy_89 Forumite Posts: 245 Forumite
    As a groom to be this thread is priceless. I now know what to look out for!
  • dundeediva
    dundeediva Forumite Posts: 413 Forumite
    Oh my word! I'm can feel my bridezilla-ness erupting!!!

    Three things crop up in as many days!!

    1. A very good friend of mine and oh is invited to reception. We've all worked together for the past 6 years. The issue is that this is my uncles ex. He's kicking off big time, saying unnecessary and nasty things about her and the wedding. Imo he shouldn't have said anything, he should've been an adult and just dealt with it, after all it's my wedding and it's only for a few hours !!!!!!!!!

    2. Friend who is invited all day has just reconciled with her ex who seems to have invited himself to the wedding. Can't stand him at all, neither can oh. Told her no but her response was "may is ages away, watch this space"??!!

    3. Bridesmaid and best man are a married couple. They've been really excited about it and kept saying they couldn't wait to get their ds (3) his kilt for the day etc. After looking around, they've discovered it'll cost about £40-50 to hire said kilt and all of a sudden now want him in more "casual and comfortable" clothes. Bit of background, because of their roles, we've paid for the dress, shoes, jewellery, hair, kilt for bm, night before the wedding for her and night for them both the night of the wedding. We went for the best options available so there is plenty of food and drink all day, I'm not having hen/stag dos (not our idea of fun) so they have nothing to pay for. I don't know whether it's to try to get us to pay for it or whether they're just being difficult.

    Why does everything happen at once? One drama at a time please people!!!!!!
    Saving money like a trouper...
  • stewby
    stewby Forumite Posts: 1,206
    1,000 Posts Combo Breaker Debt-free and Proud!

    I admit it. I might be a wee bit of a bride-zilla.

    I am like a few other people on here (only read a few pages so far) and am not into the whole centre of attention thing so discussed with OH and thankfully he feels the same.

    Our wedding is many years away (2018) so planning is ongoing but not much bought.

    * Our venue (already booked) is a beautiful hall and we are going for the whole weekend. Very immediate family (+ a cousin who is my BM) only which has caused a few rows.
    I think most people have come to accept it now (a year down the line).

    * My SIL was driving me nuts. She had butterflies for her wedding so wanted me to have the same. After having a chat with OH, we are having stars, SIL has been informed after she offered me her old wedding stuff.

    My main bridezilla issue is that shortly after we got engaged, OH's sister got engaged (which is great). However, because hers is before ours I am now really concerned that she has the same sort of ideas as me.
    I think she feels the same as she won't discuss the wedding with me or in front of me.
    I really want to tell her that it is highly unlikely things will be the same as we are two completely different people.

    My parents are being really well-behaved but I think they are just worried that I go back to the original idea of wearing trainers under the dress.

    I dare say I will be back with more bridezilla-y stuff. 2018 is a long way away.
    Mortgage: £0/£80,329.91
    Savings: £0/£6400
  • littleme27
    littleme27 Forumite Posts: 1 Newbie
    I'm a Bridezilla and my confession is that I reallly dont want to invite the best mans (grooms brother) best friend and his wife (and their child who will be born by then!). He's alright but I've never quite seen eye to eye with her and she just annoys me! (But apparently we have to because their the best man best friends and we got invited to their wedding-we didn't go!)

    I'm also a Bridezilla because I just don't understand how hotels can charge such astronomical prices. How are we EVER going to afford this?!
  • stewby
    stewby Forumite Posts: 1,206
    1,000 Posts Combo Breaker Debt-free and Proud!
    I am glad someone else is worrying about cost.

    I'm a bridezilla because there is so much lovely stuff but none of it is cheap.
    I saw these beautiful cake toppers on the internet... £195 for one. For a cake topper!!

    But you are right... everything is just crazily priced the minute the word wedding is put near it.

    Better get saving...

    On the plus side... the bridezilla from the other day has calmed down a bit as my OH spoke to his sister and she is not having stars as her theme.
    Mortgage: £0/£80,329.91
    Savings: £0/£6400
  • redfragglebiker
    redfragglebiker Forumite Posts: 856
    Stoptober Survivor
    I am a bridezilla because I swear I will end up murdering one of my parents before we actually get wed!
    Date is all set for June this year. Mum has been difficult and pushy trying to dictate what we do and don't have (we're paying for it ourselves btw so no vested interest there) Finally got her to calm down and she's been lovely and really on board. So now my Dad decides to start up. He's decided he hates his suit and was very vocal about it. No tact, no querying if there's an alternative just "I think it looks cheap and crap and nasty and I don't like it at all" He's said he'll wear it if that's what I want but he's also made it very clear it's under sufferance.
    Suit hire place has requested 12 weeks before the date for booking. We're at 16 weeks so basically I have to try and get a new suit option for Groom, Best Man, 2 ushers and 2 dads within 4 weeks and they all live in different areas of the Country!
    My H2B has been great and has said he'll try some other options on so he can see if there's one he likes equally that might be better for my Dad but TBH I'm more upset about how he spoke to me. He approached it with all the tact of a brick and didn't really seem to care that he was basically slagging off a suit that both me and H2B really liked.
    Upshot of it all is that I've told H2b that if he prefers the original suit to any of the new ones he's going to try on then we'll stick with that and my Dad can lump it!
    GAH! Wish we'd eloped!
    Everyone has a dark side... apparently mine is called Harold?!? :huh:
  • stewby
    stewby Forumite Posts: 1,206
    1,000 Posts Combo Breaker Debt-free and Proud!
    Oh.... that absolutely sucks redfragglebiker.
    I can't believe after your mum finally calming down, your dad has now started up and about something as simple as the suit.

    Fingers crossed you can get it all sorted. How lovely of your H2B to be so considerate and caring. Not everyone would try to be so accomodating.
    Mortgage: £0/£80,329.91
    Savings: £0/£6400
  • redfragglebiker
    redfragglebiker Forumite Posts: 856
    Stoptober Survivor
    Aww thanks for the support Stewby. It's actually really out of Character for my Dad not to have any tact so I don't know if he'd just had a bad day or what but he really got to me. OH has now booked appointments to try on the alternative suits but I have made sure he knows that it is 100% down to him to choose his favourite!
    I've also asked my sister to go to a second try on with my Dad so she can honestly tell me if it does look bad or if my Dad just isn't used to how a fitted suit sits on him!
    Everyone has a dark side... apparently mine is called Harold?!? :huh:
  • masterofnumbers
    masterofnumbers Forumite Posts: 26 Forumite
    I'm a Bridezilla because.....

    My BM is driving me INSANE because she is so self conscious about her dress (which looks lovely) no you don't look huge, no you don't need to lose 2 stone so you look like the other 2 BM'S and please stop complaining that your boyfriend is sitting apart from you, you have been together 5 mins your lucky he's even invited!

    3 of my guests are now pregnant and have happily told me that their babies will be at the ceremony and reception - couldn't they have ASKED me about this? I love kids but screaming babies isn't ideal plus I want people to be admiring me not the newborn babies

    9 months to go and my mother who bless her wants to make the cake is having a meltdown over the fact that I hate fruit cake and want sponge

    Hen do - no I don't want to go out with inflatable willies and L plates I want to go to winter wonderland, if you wont do what I want for the hen do then please don't bother coming

    Am I beginning to sound unreasonable yet??
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