I am a Bridezilla and my confession is....

findingmyownway

Thats terrible Becca - as if people would think its ok just to turn up for the free food!!!

I would tell your friend that either his gf comes for the whole thing, or just the evening do. Deffo not reception without ceremony.

Mojisola

becca0417 wrote: »

A friend of my OHs has told us that his gf is not coming to the ceremony just to the meal and reception after. Now neither of us are happy with this ... how do we deal with it? Don't want the friend to be upset but I think this is rude!

It depends what her reason is - working, child-care problems?

becca0417

If it was that, there would be no issue! She doesnt like churches....

mandragora_2

So a question of personal creed. I think that's quite valid, myself, and would understand it. Each to their own.

duchy

I'd just smile sweetly and tell him you understand completely and have taken her off the day list and will look forward to seeing her in the evening.
I think it's her absolute right to avoid churches if she chooses BUT she shouldn't be expecting to be invited to the wedding breakfast if she chooses to do so . It's your call if you are understanding enough of her rejection of your beliefs to welcome her to the meal (eg I come from a religiously mixed background and some (not all) relatives wouldn't be comfortable attending the religious part -and I'd respect that and invite them to the meal but just "I don't like churches" wouldn't cut it for me-I'm asking you to come and share our union not blinking well convert !!). I've attended weddings which were faiths I don't believe in -I went because I wanted to share the celebration of the marriage-and let the religious bit drift over my head.

This thread is always good for reminding me how socially clueless some people are-if you are invited as a guest you don't get to choose which bits you want to attend sheesh

NoAngel

It's a difficult one. It does seem quite rude to not come to the ceremony. But she may have some real reason that she doesn't want to go to a church and feels uncomfortable there. I'd just let her do as she pleases - after all, you're going to be far too preoccupied to notice whether or not she's there anyway.

9ja4life

Got an RSVP back today. The invite was sent to 1 person. RSVP had 6 names on it!:mad: Initially, I thought it was a joke and then decided to call him.

Me: Thanks for the RSVP but who are all the other pp on it?
Him: Oh, it's my mum and siblings

!!!!!!???? Don't know them, have never met them... 5 extra people! I was so cross I said to him, there's no space for them ad it's ok if you don't want to come as well.

He then said, ok I'll discuss it with them and get back to you as I wanted to use it as a family holiday!

Arrggghhh...it's my wedding not your family's holiday! I'm tempted to call him and tell him not to bother coming at all!

johannalf88

9ja4life wrote: »

Got an RSVP back today. The invite was sent to 1 person. RSVP had 6 names on it!:mad: Initially, I thought it was a joke and then decided to call him.

Me: Thanks for the RSVP but who are all the other pp on it?
Him: Oh, it's my mum and siblings

!!!!!!???? Don't know them, have never met them... 5 extra people! I was so cross I said to him, there's no space for them ad it's ok if you don't want to come as well.

He then said, ok I'll discuss it with them and get back to you as I wanted to use it as a family holiday!

Arrggghhh...it's my wedding not your family's holiday! I'm tempted to call him and tell him not to bother coming at all!

Wow! Totally justified and not at all Bridezilla! My OH also agrees....

wanchai_2

sugarwalsh wrote: »

Wanchai - Maybe you should forget the birdcages and go for hamster cages???

MEgan

Lol!!!!!!!!! :rotfl:

To thOse with the last minute RSVP from the MIL, the 5 extra guests (!) and the girl who doesn't like churches but will come for a free dinner, I feel your pain!!!!! !!!!!!! :eek:

Jewelleryfan

I had my first bridezilla rant to OH the other day :mad:

I'd gone to visit a close friend and was chatting about the wedding. She then double checked she had written the date on her phone which she had. We were talking about the order of the day or the day and evening guests and she was very excited about being a day guest we then got on the topic of guest list, numbers and plus ones and I explained as we both have large family/friends we can't invite everyone's plus ones and this would include her.
When we got engaged and planned out numbers she was single and had just split up with a guy who she planned to move to Canada to be with. That all fell apart just like all the relationships before and I thought she was single again. She told me how she has met a 41 year old man (she is 30) and he has 2 children. They have been together for 2 months but she had kept it secret.
Anyway she asked if he could come to the wedding, it's not for over 18 months yet so I said we had reached our limit in numbers and were not inviting plus ones. She then said that she didn't really want to go without him :eek: this really hurt me, she is one of my closest friends and to make a comment like that really upset me were paying about £65 per person for the day and to be honest if I'm paying that I want our friends and family to be there not someone's plus one. She will know plenty of people there so it's not like she won't know anyone.
As the wedding isn't for ages yet we will have to see nearer the time, maybe they both just come to the evening bit instead but I really did want her there
I had made it quite clear about only her coming on the save the date and when we have spoken but now she has met him.

Anyway that's my first rant over :rotfl: